Nymphomaniac Conference
29 July 2010, 12:49 PM
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Nymphomaniac Conference
A man boarded an aircraft at London's Heathrow Airport for New
York, and taking his seat as he settled in, he noticed a very beautiful
woman boarding the plane. He realised she was heading straight toward
his seat and bingo - she took the seat right beside him.
'Hello', he blurted out, 'Business trip or vacation?'
She turned, smiled enchantingly and said, 'Business. I'm going to
the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States.'
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever
seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for
nymphomaniacs!
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, 'What's your
business role at this convention?' 'Lecturer,' she responded .'I use
my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.'
'Really', he smiled, 'what myths are those?'
'Well,' she explained, 'one popular myth is that African-American
men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American
Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth
is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of
Greek descent. We have also found that the best potential lovers in all
categories are the Irish.'
Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed. 'I'm sorry,'
she said 'I really shouldn't be discussing this with you, I don't even
know your name!'
'Tonto,' the man said. 'Tonto Papadopoulos, but my friends call
me Paddy.'
York, and taking his seat as he settled in, he noticed a very beautiful
woman boarding the plane. He realised she was heading straight toward
his seat and bingo - she took the seat right beside him.
'Hello', he blurted out, 'Business trip or vacation?'
She turned, smiled enchantingly and said, 'Business. I'm going to
the annual nymphomaniac convention in the United States.'
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever
seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting for
nymphomaniacs!
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, 'What's your
business role at this convention?' 'Lecturer,' she responded .'I use
my experience to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality.'
'Really', he smiled, 'what myths are those?'
'Well,' she explained, 'one popular myth is that African-American
men are the most well endowed when, in fact, it's the Native American
Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth
is that French men are the best lovers, when actually it is the men of
Greek descent. We have also found that the best potential lovers in all
categories are the Irish.'
Suddenly the woman became uncomfortable and blushed. 'I'm sorry,'
she said 'I really shouldn't be discussing this with you, I don't even
know your name!'
'Tonto,' the man said. 'Tonto Papadopoulos, but my friends call
me Paddy.'
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29 July 2010, 06:22 PM
#8
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I said to my wife as we were sitting watching TV the other day....Babe tell me something that will make me happy and sad all at the same time......
She said...you have the biggest **** out of all of your friends.....
She said...you have the biggest **** out of all of your friends.....
29 July 2010, 06:32 PM
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29 July 2010, 07:10 PM
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couple of old ones.
A couple are celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary and manage to book the very same resort, even hotel room, that they used on their honeymoon.
Deciding to give her husband a little treat, the wife slips off into the bathroom while hubby's watching TV to slip on the negligee that she wore that first night together.
She opens the bathroom door, and her husband looks over. "What were you thinking 30 years ago, darling?" she asks.
"I was thinking," he replies, "that I'm going to suck your ***** dry and **** your brains out."
She smiles. "And now?"
He replies, "I'm thinking I did a pretty good job of it."
wife" my **** are saggy, i'm ugly and i'm fat. Say something nice about
me"
husband "your eyesight is spot on"
Deciding to give her husband a little treat, the wife slips off into the bathroom while hubby's watching TV to slip on the negligee that she wore that first night together.
She opens the bathroom door, and her husband looks over. "What were you thinking 30 years ago, darling?" she asks.
"I was thinking," he replies, "that I'm going to suck your ***** dry and **** your brains out."
She smiles. "And now?"
He replies, "I'm thinking I did a pretty good job of it."
wife" my **** are saggy, i'm ugly and i'm fat. Say something nice about
me"
husband "your eyesight is spot on"
29 July 2010, 07:27 PM
#11
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Big gay simon goes to the doctors to get his test results the doc says I'm sorry Simon but you've got aids.
Simon is devasted and asks the doc what to do.
The doctor says eat 1 sausage, 1 head of cabbage, 20 jalapeno peppers. 40 walnuts. 40 peanuts. half a box of all bran cereal and top it off with a gallon of prune juice. Will this cure me asks Simon.
NO said the doctor but it'll give you a better understanding of what your fvckin **** is for........
Simon is devasted and asks the doc what to do.
The doctor says eat 1 sausage, 1 head of cabbage, 20 jalapeno peppers. 40 walnuts. 40 peanuts. half a box of all bran cereal and top it off with a gallon of prune juice. Will this cure me asks Simon.
NO said the doctor but it'll give you a better understanding of what your fvckin **** is for........
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