The Dogs B******s

Have you p*ssed in the wrong place?

g7prs

iTrader: (5)

Do you mean the bedroom cupboard and the likes?

s70rjw

iTrader: (2)

You went over your 2 pint limit Neil. Look on the bright side, at least you didn't dream you were a chicken laying an egg and Sh*t the bed.

addi monster

iTrader: (6)

i had a mate that used to **** in his suite case when we were working away, fpmsl, he would have to borrow clothes that didnt fit him, he did it about 3 times lol

The Dogs B******s

Yes

wrxcook

In the girlfriends mums kitchen bin, infront of her mum atleast I lifted the bin lid though, it gets brought up every Christmas now, I'll live and learn

The Dogs B******s

Have you been in that situation Bob?

oldsplice

Someone I knew years ago, stood up and did it on the sitting room carpet. Still asleep. In front of everyone.

FitnessFreak83

iTrader: (2)

HaHa, this question brought back a funny memory for me!!...

Round a girls house getting quite drunk, then for some reason i left the room and mistook the corner in her hallway as a toilet....





I still woke up with her naked bod cuddled up to me in bed the next morning i might add!!!LoL

kingofturds

iTrader: (1)

A few years back my Mum woke me up just before I was about to take a **** in her wardrobe Worst thing was I wasn't even drunk, just sleep walking.

The Dogs B******s

I've done it a few times now,but only when drunk. Glad its not just me.

s70rjw

iTrader: (2)

Do you really think if I had, I'd admit it?

(No is the honest answer, by the way)

bioforger

iTrader: (1)

Yes bollocks, I was out on the **** with some mates in Paris, got the metro (tube) back, stopped half way for a top up, downed it all, bursting for a waz and then realised there were NO bogs anywhere. But we found a cubby hole somewhere n pissed into that. Seemed fine, no mess. Unfortunately the station master's office and desk were right opposite the hole. 30 mins later we got arrested by the gendarmerie Now the French cops carry, so when 4 of them turned up we kind of shat ourselves to lul.

ditchmyster

iTrader: (7)

Big posh house in kensington christmas party, pulled the posh bird whose party it was, apparently she liked a bit of ruff woke up or not more to the point and pissed on a very very expensive chair, she was not very happy, but i made it up to her in the morning

Luminous

iTrader: (3)

Was walking home from the local with a good group of friends. Was desperate for a pee, so ran ahead and did it behind a tree....

....well in my head it was a tree, to everybody else it was a tiny sapling of a thing, with no leaves, and left me full frontal to friends and all passing traffic

wayne9t9

Wasn`t there a joke about a gold plated toilet and a trombone........

RobsyUK

iTrader: (2)

Am I the only person who mummy an daddy taught very well on how to use a toilet?

The only story I have about toileting is: After a flight back from the USA I needed a number 2 and thought I could hold until I got home. (50min drive) the M25 was at a stand stilll and I was proper touching cloth. Some extream pain and about 2hrs later we found this dirty nasty cafe with the heavenly word Toilet... I waddled round pushed the door open and saw a hole which I can only describe as the train spotting toilet. You know the one he climbs out.

I had to use it. it was the sickest thing I've ever done. 20mins later I had some relife but felt so nasty. Almost *** ****ed. I got home and scrubbed!

CREWJ

One of my mates back home used to do it all the time. The amount of TVs/Hifis they went through was hilarious.

The last straw was when he pissed on his mum when she was sleeping. Needless to say he got kicked out after that.

The Zohan

Moral of this story - Stop sleeping with you mum!

Gear Head

iTrader: (2)

When I was in my teens, I had a habbit of pissing in the corner of whatever room I was sleeping in. Never did it at home, only at mates houses!

TinyTim

iTrader: (3)

I've got a mate who poos in his garden when he's wasted. He is ginger though.

pslewis

I regularly pee on my lawn and plants ..... not when drunk - it just does wonders for the foilage ..... really does, try it. BUT, not if you are female as female pee scorches the lawn and leaves!

I only ever pee'd where I shouldn't when on holiday ... and drunk ... one morning I got up and got dressed, only to squelch my foot into a boot full of pi55!! I had pee'd in the night, into one of my boots!! (at least I guess it wasn't my girlfriend of the time!).

CREWJ

Oh that's ok then since he has no soul.

Luan Pra bang

I had a friend staying in my house while on a visit back from Australia. One night my girlfriend woke me up to point out that the friend had walked past the bathroom outside his room door and walked into our ensuite to have a sit down ****. At the time I told her to shut up and let me sleep. After much joking the next day he explained he sat down to pee so the noise would not wake us up, he could not really explain why out of 4 toilets in the house he had to pee in my bedroom.

Leslie

Hoist by your own fergibbler then!

Bet there aren't many who haven't had a similar experience under the right circumstances though!

Les

peter zippy reid

iTrader: (25)

i went out with my father inlaw when me and my ex wife stayed with them i was about 20 when my wife came home i was on my back on the living room floor with my trousers at my ankles next morning my father inlaw went to put the stereo on and it would seem i pissed on the carpet next to the stereo

urban

iTrader: (1)

Couple of times.
Once at a small party at a mates house
Apparently I entered the bathroom(which was good at least), but my target I'm told was purely the mat in front of the bath - soaked it good ans proper.
Wondered why mate wouldn't really speak with me at work on Monday!.

Confronted him, was then told of my antics and that after I'd finished I tried to get into bed with his sister (who was about the same age)


Another funny story.
Long long time ago, a few of us called to see if a mate was going out.
He proceded to say that he didn't think it was a good idea as the GF was huffing with him because he pissed his trousers.
I said, it not that bad really.
He proceded to say that he actually pissed 7 pairs, as they were all hanging up in the wardrobe at the time

markb_s1

not too bad compared to some of these stories.

a few years ago my ex wife was awoken by the sound of water (or in this case ****) hitting somethign hard.
turns out i'd got up, walked round to her side of the bed, sat on her bedside cabinet and was pissing on the book she'd been reading.
at least i didn't take a dump!