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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:13 PM
  #31  
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Originally Posted by Apparition
FCD : "This has always been my theory in that women transfer all their attention and love on to the baby which if you are as selfish as me is a big no, no. "

Yes it's true it seems that way to many men.
But it doesn't last forever.
The man soon becomes an indispensable DAD and plays as big a part in their child's life as MUM.
Yve
It doesn't 'seem' in some cases, without doubt it is reality.

Some men don't seek attention, far from it in my case. However every waking moment can't be 'baby, baby, baby if you are to keep your sanity.

If your idea of fun is talking to other new parents about baby grow styles and nappy contents then it's OK. I personally found some 'new friends' complete wets that I wouldn't have otherwise given the time of day to, but because you were now a member of the 'new baby club', thanks to your partners pre and post natal classes, you didn't want to appear the Victor Meldrew in this new found way of life.

I have friends on the other hand that can continue with all their pre- child lifestyle (within moderation) because they both understand how important it is to their relationship.

That's a quality my ex never had and of course you don't know this until it's too late unfortunately.
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:28 PM
  #32  
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I have friends on the other hand that can continue with all their pre- child lifestyle (within moderation) because they both understand how important it is to their relationship
A relationship has to adapt surely? Why need time to act as though you don't have kids? Am i just being extremely naive? Having a child together has added to my relationship not destroyed it......Personally i can't think of anything worse than going out to get drunk and stumbling back home in the early hours and my friends of the same age are all for it (no kids). Spoon you sound bitter about having children, which is not good for the kids is it?
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:34 PM
  #33  
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Exclamation

Originally Posted by Norman D. Landing
Bollox ! Since Kids, my wife is a cow !
Does she sit on your bonnet often?
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:38 PM
  #34  
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Have to agree with Weapon.... Spoon, you had a bad experience didn't you ?
Well try being the mother and not being able to relate to the child for the first year of its life, try being nearly driven insane with guilt because of this, when everyone is telling you how lucky you are????? Post antal depression is a sod to deal with. Luckily, I came out of it with help. It left scares which, have only been healed with the arrival of my grandsons, they have given me a second chance.
Spoon, every experience is different. I hope you have a good one before your time is up matey.
Yve
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:41 PM
  #35  
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Originally Posted by weapon69
A relationship has to adapt surely?
Errr that was my point, and for that it takes two.
Originally Posted by weapon69
Why need time to act as though you don't have kids? Am i just being extremely naive?
No need to act at all. Integration is the key.
Originally Posted by weapon69
Having a child together has added to my relationship not destroyed it
Good, I'm pleased for you.
Originally Posted by weapon69
......Personally i can't think of anything worse than going out to get drunk and stumbling back home in the early hours and my friends of the same age are all for it (no kids).
Nobody even hinted on this, let alone suggest it.
Originally Posted by weapon69
Spoon you sound bitter about having children, which is not good for the kids is it?
Oh dear, I tell you of my experience and get diagnosed, which incidentally is way off the mark.
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:42 PM
  #36  
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Originally Posted by OllyK
Get a dog, you can always take that to the RSPCA if you can't cut it.
Sometimes Olly, I think you've borrowed my brain
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:44 PM
  #37  
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Originally Posted by Apparition
Have to agree with Weapon.... Spoon, you had a bad experience didn't you ?
Well try being the mother and not being able to relate to the child for the first year of its life, try being nearly driven insane with guilt because of this, when everyone is telling you how lucky you are????? Post antal depression is a sod to deal with. Luckily, I came out of it with help. It left scares which, have only been healed with the arrival of my grandsons, they have given me a second chance.
Spoon, every experience is different. I hope you have a good one before your time is up matey.
Yve
From what I am reading, you too had a bad experience so how you can agree with Weapon is slightly confusing.
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:48 PM
  #38  
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Originally Posted by sti-04!!
Why care ??

Gives us men plenty of time to continue in what we do best

Play fifa, champ manager, watch footie on the telly, go to the pub & wash our cars

Suits me

This happened with the last one & will probs happen with the next
I get to do all that but I also have someone who can and wants to have a good time without the burden of kids plus have an awful lot more money to spend on ourselves.
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:49 PM
  #39  
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Originally Posted by Spoon
From what I am reading, you too had a bad experience so how you can agree with Weapon is slightly confusing.
Spoon - After everything you've been through you're still trying to understand women.

Save your sanity and don't try .

ps I'm not diagnosing you as clinically insane
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 04:51 PM
  #40  
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Originally Posted by Reality
Spoon - After everything you've been through you're still trying to understand women.

Save your sanity and don't try .

ps I'm not diagnosing you as clinically insane
The only predictable thing about women is their unpredictability. The sooner blokes know this the better.

Wibble
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 05:43 PM
  #41  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by weapon69
......Personally i can't think of anything worse than going out to get drunk and stumbling back home in the early hours and my friends of the same age are all for it (no kids).

Nobody even hinted on this, let alone suggest it.
err where have i said i am referring to you? just an example of how motherhood has changed my opinion on my friends lifestyles.

Originally Posted by weapon69
Spoon you sound bitter about having children, which is not good for the kids is it?

Oh dear, I tell you of my experience and get diagnosed, which incidentally is way off the mark
Glad to hear it! Having kids was worth it all then wasn't it?

Women are very strange when they have a new toy!!
I just thought it was abit strange to refer to your child as a new toy that was all....

Last edited by weapon69; Sep 21, 2005 at 05:49 PM.
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Old Sep 21, 2005 | 07:23 PM
  #42  
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Originally Posted by weapon69
err where have i said i am referring to you? just an example of how motherhood has changed my opinion on my friends lifestyles.
You didn't but you'll find I never said you did either.

Originally Posted by weapon69
Glad to hear it! Having kids was worth it all then wasn't it?
No it wasn't worth it all.

Originally Posted by weapon69
I just thought it was abit strange to refer to your child as a new toy that was all....
The word 'toy' wasn't to be taken literally although having said that it is a very close analogy, believe me.
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