eClaire

Before your kids were born did you lie in bed at night and think:

'**** - this is it; the end of my life as I know it' and 'How the hell am I going to look after it?'?


Other half is excited - it's me thats freaking out!

OllyK

I'm before kids, I intend to stay that way and I have very little stress in my life.

The Zohan

Yes, similar. Had our first when i was 38, now 41 so getting on a bit and i was not very maternal or interested in children.

It all changed the first time i held Ayla in my arms (like someone threw a switch) and the positives of parenthood soon outweigh those thoughts or misgivings.

Hope this helps

oh and,
Now got two of 'em, Olivia is just 3 months old.

Would not change things for the world.

except the early morning feeds maybe

Paul

sti-04!!

Come out with me on saturday night & i will make you forget about it all

eClaire

Bit late for me to think that way Olly Due in 10 days!

That helps a lot Paul I thought this would be the case - I don't suppose there is anything as life changing as having children. I suspect even the most maternal people get worried.

I will just miss things like cuddling up every morning eating breakfast in bed together Or cuddling up on the couch with a good film and a curry.

eClaire

I'd rather not. Thank you anyway

Hanslow

I'm with OllyK on this one. Your life is now over

Given that kids can't flee the nest until they are about 40 you are now stuck with them, even if you don't like each other. Still, that's the joy of parenthood with all that worry, finance, priorities on the kids, etc.

At least you enjoyed a few years before

sti-04!!

eClaire

Additional post:

Don't get me wrong - I love my bump to bits!

eClaire

HANSLOW!!!

You have kids - don't you?



Even though I am only 22 , I have done a LOT of things. Things I am glad I did, but even more things I regret and still cringe about to this day. I have done things some people don't get round to doing until they are in their 30s. Thinking about it this way I don't know what I am worrying about

OllyK

2 bumps on the front of a woman is just fine, no need for a third

eClaire

LOL


The third often has a positive impact on the two bumps you refer to I have been VERY lucky - I just hope it stays that way!!

Hanslow

LOL what makes you think that? Is it that obvious?

My sister has two little 'uns and I've just seen her life go to pot and know full well that it isn't for me.

I'm sure you'll love it when they are writing all over your walls, being stubborn, having temper tantrums, getting pregnant at 12, etc.

Seriously though, if it's your thing, hope it all works out for you

ajm

Your life is ruined. You are into mitigation now.

eClaire

Nothing a spanked erse won't sort!

Hanslow

Tut-tut

Now you know you're not even supposed to look at your child the wrong way or the PC brigade will be down on you like a ton of bricks, child in care, mother dragged through the papers as a bad parent, etc. etc.

Or was the spanked **** for you

Big Den

Just wait until they get to the teenager stage - then you'll really know you fooked up!

I'm with Olly - just wish I'd stuck to it all those years ago!!

It's not all negative though eClaire - don't let us cynical folk spoil it for you.

Den

eClaire

Not for me Hanslow

I suppose thats another topic for discussion; spanking your kids - never done me any harm


Hmmm, Den, I think I will just keep on rereading Paul's post

NotoriousREV

Now matter how life changing you think it's going to be, you've underestimated the effect

But I mean it in a good way (mainly).

No sleep for 9 months so far and counting...

Spoon

Doubts before are easy. The aftermath is the killer.

Hope it all works out for you chocolate.

In my case it completely destroyed an otherwise excellent relationship. I wouldn't go there again for all the marmite in Geneva.

Women are very strange when they have a new toy!!

eClaire

The sleep thing is an issue for me, REV - I can be a total bitch at the best of times


Thanks Spo I know hubby and I will be ok; it will be hard but we will get there. I am sorry to hear it wasn't what everyone makes it out to be for you

I don't blame you not wanting the marmite though - it's rubbish

Spoon

Most people say what they think people want to hear!! Ask the same people after the event.

Flatcapdriver

This has always been my theory in that women transfer all their attention and love on to the baby which if you are as selfish as me is a big no, no.

This results in major down turn in the rooting department coupled with a massive hike in the responsibility stakes which is not what I signed up for and despite friend's protestations that it won't change their lives one bit, once the baby is born you hardly ever see them.

I've left it to others.

sti-04!!

Why care ??

Gives us men plenty of time to continue in what we do best

Play fifa, champ manager, watch footie on the telly, go to the pub & wash our cars

Suits me

This happened with the last one & will probs happen with the next

weapon69

Aww mate... I'll get my life back when Jacjac goes to school (only 3.5 years to go )

weapon69

Glad it was a positive experience

Apparition

Just recently had a conversation about all this with my brother who is now 42 and embarking on what could possibly be a baby making relationship.
I'll tell you what I told him.
It impinges greatly on one's life. It's a one way ticket, no returns. You have to sacrifice a great deal if you're going to do the job correctly.
I sadly, suffered Post natal depression for 2 years after my Ben was born. I resented his demands on my time.

BUT I would never ever turn back the clock if I had the chance. He and his sister are the most precious things in my life and they have and are still bringing me so much pleasure,(including 2 soon to be 3 brilliant grandchildren!)

So, yes, its a life changing experience, but for the good.
Yve

OllyK

Get a dog, you can always take that to the RSPCA if you can't cut it.

Apparition

FCD : "This has always been my theory in that women transfer all their attention and love on to the baby which if you are as selfish as me is a big no, no. "

Yes it's true it seems that way to many men.
But it doesn't last forever.
The man soon becomes an indispensable DAD and plays as big a part in their child's life as MUM.
Yve

Norman D. Landing

Bollox ! Since Kids, my wife is a cow !