Bamba

... my previous thread.

However, I cannot remain taciturn on the subject of my TVR experience. To say such cars are a handful is as much an understatement as saying George W Bush is a touch on the dim side.

Picture - if you can - a portly, reserved gentleman donning his best pair of pince-nez and squeezing into the driver's seat of a TVR Chimera. Picture the care with which said gentleman tucks in his carvat, fastens his safety belt, adjusts the seat, starts the car and ...

... screams away in a smoking cloud of burning rubber, taking the first corner with the rear of the car at 90 degress to the direction of travel, like some tweed-clad maniac who had all the look of a man who has recently smoked a quick kilo of Arabia's best marijuana.

I fear this is not what the owner had in mind when he cautioned that I should 'take it steady'. I had no idea that such cars were so powerful.

Needless to say, I have crossed the TVR off my list. They look jolly nice but (and call me picky if you must) I have a medical aversion to being overtaken by my own rear axle and I will get a doctor's note to prove it if I must.

Anyway, I hope this finds you all in good spirits - I merely popped in to bring you up to date with my car hunting exploits.

Kindest regards,
Bamba (one man who recently nearly added incontinence to his list of driving woes)

banshi

May I extend a heartfelt welcome back Bamba. I am advised that dementia plays havoc with ones ability to recall the minutia of the recent past.

Suffice that you are still able to recount your experience of TVR automotive design and engineering. I fear that once again a less than optimum course was chosen, the vehicle that should have been selected from the fourcourt was the Griffith 500.

The Chimera is a mere apology for the tradition of the hairy chested Blackpool Sports cars. But as you have already dismissed the product intended to keep the little lady amused whilst away from houshold duties. There would be but little benifit derived from further itimacy with the marque.

Worry not about incontinence my dear fellow. It is an ailment that all will experience when their ambitions exceed their abilities.

I wish you well with your venture and await further information upon your quest.

Sincere felicitations.

Dave T-S

Banshi, regrettably I must admonish you in your well meaning suggestion of a Griff 500 to Bamba.

Bamba
I hope this finds you in good spirits (in my case, to be completely accurate, under the effects of Rosemount Chardonnay rather than spirits - I hope you will forgive me for imbibing fermented grape products from the colonies rather than distilled grain from the highlands).

Undoubtably, if you require to be overtaken by your own rear axle in the shortest possible space of time, the only TVR to carry out this fruitful exercise in (apart from the Tuscan) has to be the Cerbera.

Your laundry bill will, unfortunately, increase at the same rate as your sphincter muscles contract.

By the way, if you make your way to the top right of the page where it says select posts from *X* amount of days and select 20 days or thereabouts, with a bit of searching your previous thread will reappear as if by magic.

Happy car hunting and greetings of the season!

[This message has been edited by Dave T-S (edited 10 August 2001).]

boomer

Bamba,

have you ever considered a "Vanquish" (see the "General Questions" edition, under the Topmost Gear column, circa elevenses this morning).

Seems pretty adequate!

mb

banshi

Mr T-S Sir,

Whilst I will readily yeild to your superior intellect, impecable taste, razor sharp wit and unbounded automitive knowledge.
I would respectfully draw attention to the following critereon.

The Cerbera does inded fulfil the primary requirements specified. However I note it is lacking in some respects. From my best recollection this is a vehicle comprising a fully enclosed cockpit. This removes the wind in the handlebar moustache format that has for decades been a benchmark of the Gentleman Driver. It also obviates the need for that cornerstone of good grooming, the copious application of Brycream. Whilst I accept the the aforementioned toiletry may still be utilised, one would be considered something of a pretender in Society Circles.

Last and by no means least the vehicle in question appears to provide accommodation for FOUR persons. Having identified a surfeit of seating only the most outrageous bounder would profess such to be a true sports car.

Dave T-S

Banshi
You raise valid points

Bamba
Good morning sir. I trust the day finds you well albeit it being a somewhat precipitous outlook on the metereological front.

My colleague Banshi raises some important issues.

If it is a closed gentlemans sporting carriage that you are seeking then a gentleman of your standing can only be looking at a Bristol.

Should, as Mr Banshi says, you wish for an open carriage so you may experience the delights of the wind in your toupee, insects in your teeth and the delightful aromas of the countryside (pig farms and suchlike), then it has to be a Morgan.

[This message has been edited by Dave T-S (edited 12 August 2001).]

astraboy

Is it me, or does everyone suddenly become a lot more articulate when Bamba comes on the board?
Bamba,
Stop messing around and get yourself a mans car. Get yourself a Cossie.
astraboy.

LEE P

Thats right astraboy! get a cossie and start reading max power and watching men and motors after elevensies. P.s loose th cravate its the 21st century. only kidding Bamba, keep up the good work, them dictionarys sure are chewy! Lee