CrisPDuk

Jehovah's Witnesses, Christian Scientists, and the rest of you fundamentalist nutters. Why will you not take no for an answer When I say I'm not interested, I do mean F**K OFF!

What do I need to do? paint an inverted pentangle on my door

OllyK

Invite them in, that usually stumps them

PG

Then you come on here and get it from the Muslims

gsm1

Place a sign outside your door...a polite one.

richs2891

I have a camera above the front door, so if they look dodgy ie jehovos I dont bother answering the door, Saves loads of effort arguing with them

Richard

CrisPDuk

That sounds like a good idea, I can get one of them signs like they have in A & E receptions so I can tell them to F**K OFF form the comfort of my armchair

richardg

add a water squirter and make sure you can record what the camera sees...

turboman786

PG......'the Muslims' rarely if ever try to propogate the religion on here, usually they post to simply address matters that others have raised on here. Besides which its hardly analogous to knocking on your door, you do have a CHOICE on scoobynet, should you wish not to read the posts.

Abdabz

I dont answer the door unless Im expecting someone - most of my mates know to call me on the mobile before they knock...
It pisses the window cleaner and milkman off sometimes though when they come to collect their cash - Normally pay them for four weeks at a time, but in my two years living here its only my brother (and housemate) who's had valuable minutes of his life wasted by talking to brother *** and brother cheese from the jesus later christ day saints church folk!!!!
Chuffin nutters!

PG

And that is what I do. Any thread that looks to be going that way I do my best to avoid especially those which involve the usual suspects.
Now that we are on the subject I will no longer read this thread

Jerome

I gather that telling them you are a devout catholic does the trick.

M444GY

iTrader: (72)

lock and load tell them that u are a gay crack smoking satanist and they will leave pretty sharpish!

workshy_fopp

Just say "No thanks, I'm a theodolite" gets them every time. Works well on street canvasers types too.

scoobydood

Ex girlfriends father got sick of them too.. so when they next knocked on the door he opened it just wearing a towel. As they talk to them he lets the towel drop further and further until he is showing his orange pubes.... They run for cover. Never seen them since...

IPKIS

Just tell them to F**k OFF and shut the door




works for me

Jerome

He should be careful. I'm sure that would be classed as possession of an offensive weapon.

ThrustSSC

Tell them you're a Prospective Parliamentary Candidate for the Liberal Democrats and invite them in for a chat. That should do the trick.

Alas

I introduce them to my friend.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6.../ossiesnow.jpg

They usually leave pretty sharpish. Especially when I kid on I can't hold him much longer. Ever seen a Jehovah hurdle a 5ft gate

ScoobyDriverWannabe

My cousin is the only person I know of who actually enjoys Jehovah witnesses knocking on his door.

He always has one of those lucky man hats next to the door.

When they nock on he opens shouting "do you have no respect for my religion interrupting me during my prayer time".

He then tells them to kneel down in middle of garden and beg to Allah for forgiveness.

fast bloke

I love bible bashers calling to the door, but then I am the sort of saddo that converts America Life telesales people to normality when they try and sell me something. Score so far is FB 6, America Life -2, Jehovas -1, three fruits in suits on the train to Dublin once -3

I find that a well structured argument works, and if it doesn't, kidnap them and torture them until the renounce religion

scoobchrissy

iTrader: (1)

Just tell them to f**k off....

paulwrxboro

just tell them your just on your way to give blood

fast bloke

just tell them your just on your way to drink blood

NotoriousREV

Just answer the door masturbating, it tends to get rid of most people.

Alas

PMSL

Jamo

iTrader: (23)

they only ever came once to my house, they do tell each other to steer clear, so when you tell them your not interested make sure you get the point accross propperlly.

jamo

Chelspeed

What you need to remember is your next door neighbour may be more vulnerable than you are. If you drive them away in short order (eg f**k right off, or some of the more extreme forms above!!!) they will go next door and may finally manage to convert someone to their nasty, exploitative, fundamentalist, god-squad habits.

So as a confirmed atheist (ie person with more than half a brain cell) it is your DUTY to your local area, your neighbours and indeed to society as a whole, to invite them in, engage them in conversation, pretend to be interested, pretend to be on the verge of conversion or whatever it takes to keep them in your house for as long as humanly possible.

Theoretically.




I just don't answer the door......

Scoob99

iTrader: (1)

Had this years ago, guy knocked started blah blah blah, sorry not intrested I go to shut the door and he put his foot in it, I said listen mate you have 10 secs to get your foot out of my door otherwise the dog gets you, Well you should have seen him run with Max on his ar$e, brifcase went one way he went the other with Max in toe, and my neighbour stood there nearly wetting himself laughing........RIP Max
Cheers
Colin

sti-04!!

I used to do this as a part time job, had loads of fun, got paid really well !

I just dont understand why people just cant give you a few minutes of your time, after all time is free

paul-s

just as bad as window salesmen