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I've been receiving, on average, one *****-enlargement spam per hour per e-mail address, for the last two weeks.
So if I took them all up, (from only one address) my ***** would have grown three inches per hour, or 72 inches per day, or 504 inches per week, over two weeks, making me a dazzling 1008 inches longer. 84 feet of manhood...
I wouldn't have to go to the bathroom! I could just duct tape the end of that thing onto the urinal and sit right here at my desk.
(Then the copier paper delivery cart rumbles in ... ouch ouch ouch ouch!)