bubblegum

Bit morbid this one
but someone I know has suffered a sudden death. Following the autopsy which could not determin the reason for their Death, the Coroners office has opened and ajourned an inquest, why they wait for the results of tests being carried out.


We have to wait untill nearly the end of April for the inquest to be re-opened in the meantime I am left wondering why my eldest brother who was 36 has died. Does it really take so long for the results of the blood and I presume tissure tests that they are doing to be finalised.


Any light someone could through on this whole process I would be very grateful for.

bubblegum

BeverleyM

Bubblegum,
Sorry, I can't answer your question, but just wanted to send my condolences. I can't imagine how you must be feeling. I hope you get the answers you are looking for, and wish you all the best.
Good luck.
Beverley

bubblegum

Beverly thanks for the kind words. I was a bit aprehensive of posting as non scooby related is becoming a bit chockabloc of threads like mine of late. Words can not describe how numb I feel inside, knowing that I will never see him again is painful enough without the extra burdon of not knowing what happened to him.

bubblegum

BeverleyM

Bubblegum,
I've been through something very similar, so I can empathise.
You are very welcome to mail me.
All the best
Beverley

brendy

Just a few words to help explain the process. Often a post mortem does not give an indication of the cause of death. If this is the case the coroner can choose to keep the case open to allow all information to become available before making a decision.
If tissue has been sent for genotyping for diseases with a genetic basis it may take some time for all the results to be ready. More than likely given that it was a middle aged man the cause of death was cardiac and sudden cardiac arrest in adults can occur with no obvious cause. The question that you have to think about - is there a family history of sudden death?
Often familial hypercholesterolaemia and certain cardiomyopathies can run in the male members of families. IF you are worried about this talk to you GP who can arrange screening via a cardiology out-patient clinic.
Hope this is of help - not trying to be a smart **** just give some relevant answers.

bubblegum

Beverley if it is ok, I will send you an email in a couple of days?
Brendy thanks for the info, it is very much appreciated.
bubblegum

RB5320

my condolences. I dont want to go into too much detail here, but a few years ago my wife died very suddenly, aged 27. Was put down to Sudden Adult Death syndrome, which is more common than most people realize.

As for the inquest, dont get too concerned about this. In my case we had to wait nearly 5 months and the inquest eventually lasted about 15 minutes. It is just a formality and they go out of their way to make it as painless as possible.
Feel free to mail me as per profile if you want to ask any questions in private. I will try to help.
All the best.

Steve

red_dog104

I'm sorry. I have been a 'witness' at coroners court and it was a trauma but it didn't take long and it was nice to finally get some kind of closure so I could mourn the loss of my boyfriend. It did seem kind of pointless to me as we knew what the cause of death was (suicide) but as he was only 17 I guess they had to go through it. Anyway, if you need to know anything, then I will try and help as much as I can. Take care.

BeverleyJM

Bubblegum
No problem

58GT

Total bummer. Went through something similar last year. I think though that if it had been cardiac arrest the autopsy would have found it. I'm not a doctor though.

I'm afraid this won't get easier for you real soon. Condolences.

bubblegum

Yesterday his Cremation took place and now I am left with my life turned upside down. I had so many plans for the future which now seem pointless. I have lost all motivation and can not see the point in doing anything any more. I am left with a large gaping hole where he use to be.

red_dog104

Death is never easy to cope with at any age. You may benefit from seeing a berevement councellor. I know I did. It helps put things in perspective. Just remember, it's early days and it's perfectly natural to feel as you do.

Mail me if you want to talk.

RB5320

I agree with red-dog. It is very early. There isnt a quick fix. What you are feeling is natural. Lack of motivation is a fairly typical symptom of depression. It WILL get better.
Everyone reacts differently to a loss such as yours. You say that all your plans now seem pointless but I think deep down you know this is not the case. Having suffered a similar loss, my long term plans and ambitions have become much more important. Not necessarily careerwise, more the things that I have always wanted to do, places to visit etc. For example, for years I thought about walking the Inca Trail in Peru. After losing my wife I decided to finally do it. I cannot describe the feeling when I finally did it. Sure, it was emotional, but good emotions. I felt like I had achieved something. I am sure you must have similar things that you have always thought about doing. Start planning. This in itself will give you a distraction. That is what you need - something positive to take your mind off things, even if only for minutes at a time. These minutes will then start becoming hours and you will start to come to terms with it.
Its not an easy thing to cope with but as I said above, things will get better. Your friends will support you and you shouldnt feel bad about leaning on them. That is what they are for. Above all, be as positive as you can.
Feel free to mail me if I can help.

Steve

Chrisgr31

I think you have to consider what the person who has passed away would have wanted. In the vast majority of cases they would of wanted you to get on with your life, whilst remembering them. Maybe taking up an interest which was close to their heart that you can pursue in their memory.

If I was to pass away tomorrow I wouldn't want my parents fiancee etc to feel that they had nothing to live for, I'd want them to pursue some of the projects I am working on, seeing them through to completion etc.

Its also worth considering that they say that grieving is a 12 month progress as you always have anniversarys that are the first without someone.