Abdabz

South Parks Timmy is to sign for Liverpool today!

In a show of the clubs true ambition the tourette infested wheelchair bound chap has been signed to score more goals for the club.
Over the past few years (since series 7 of South Park) Timmy has changed his name by deed poll and spent 8 hours a day on a rack being stretched.

Coach Rafa Beneathus admitted he wished to achieve a safe mid table position this coming season having signed 6 players all rated internationally as "very average"... "I errr want to errr fineesh eeen ze top 10" he said when being interviewed at a local police station when bailing out Stevee Gerrard last night...

Fans of other clubs are ringing in sick all over the country suffering from horrendous stomach cramps due to too much laughing at this latest summer signing from the club spiralling into mid table anonimity...

TIMMMY!

Pabs

Funkii Munkii

Looks like he wants to stick with that long ball game introduced so successfully by Houllier

A waste of £7m IMHO, why not have paid £8-£10m for AJ at Palace, you'd get more goals for your money and a far better all round footballer rather than a giraffe!

al3x

Dad and I were just discussing this (as Arsenal supporters), Why do Liverpool need an average player like Crouch?. Didn`t they do the same thing with a player called Heskey?!. And they want to sell Baros, I think he is a much better player.

RLE

iTrader: (2)

I must admit I have some apprehensions of the Crouch signing as a Liverpool supporter. Does give them a different dimension but whether he gets the goals we'll have to see. I fear the fans may get on his back pretty quickly which wont help his confidence and I'd have liked to see the signing of a top striker to signal our intent but finances appear to dictate otherwise.

Baros has the ability but seeing him week in week out frustrates the living daylights out of me. He's been given his chance but didn't take it in my opinion. I'd love to see Morientes flourish but I think he'll have another season where he fails to deliver. Hope I'm wrong as the guy is a great talent. Likewise Cisse has the pace and the instinct but he seems to struggle with his touches. Maybe his sharpness will come in the coming months.

Garcia and Alonso were supposed to be average international signings but look at their impact last season. I figure they'll progress even further.

Top three may be out but they need to vastly improve. 37 pts behind Chelsea was a joke and the Champions League success merely covered the cracks.

Fingers crossed............

rizla06

Nobody seems to give credit to Baros that he struggled as a lone striker for a large part of last season. No Morientes until January, Le Tallec was out on loan & called back but hardly made an appearance, Mellor & Pongolle injured. It might have been a different story if Baros & Cisse had been able to strike up a good partnership. Benitez just wants rid of him for what has allegedly gone on behind closed doors and a £5.5m offer for him from a team who is destined for the drop again next season is an insult for a player of his calibre who won the Golden Boot at Euro 2004. Liverpool buy players at silly prices & nearly always end up selling them for far less than they paid for them.



The £7m for Crouch & £21m by Chelsea for Wright-Phillips is nothing short of making a mockery of a player’s worth. I hope both teams get stung for it for wasting money. If Crouch is that good, why weren’t Southampton flooded with offers from mediocre teams who could afford the over-inflated price of £7m?