CONDESENDING - MSPs
26 January 2000, 06:09 PM
#1
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So I go into a wheel place - that comes recommended...
Two nurds behind desk
...yeah love - whadda want???
I have an Impreza and I
...glances exchanged
.... yeah yeah you want the wheels done gold...
Well no actually I was thinking in terms of black or dark blue....
....look love ... they all have em done gold... what sorta blue do you want...
Well dark metallic blue - I suppose....
....love... please... they all have em done gold....Imprezzzaasss.....gold love....
shall I bring the wheels in then....
.... sure... love.... you do that - (could almost feel the pat on the head).... - glance glance - grin grin...... what colour you gonna have.....Gold
No blue....
....look love - we're busy - you wanna come back with your husband when you make up your mind.....
SCREAMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!
Two nurds behind desk
...yeah love - whadda want???
I have an Impreza and I
...glances exchanged
.... yeah yeah you want the wheels done gold...
Well no actually I was thinking in terms of black or dark blue....
....look love ... they all have em done gold... what sorta blue do you want...
Well dark metallic blue - I suppose....
....love... please... they all have em done gold....Imprezzzaasss.....gold love....
shall I bring the wheels in then....
.... sure... love.... you do that - (could almost feel the pat on the head).... - glance glance - grin grin...... what colour you gonna have.....Gold
No blue....
....look love - we're busy - you wanna come back with your husband when you make up your mind.....
SCREAMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!
26 January 2000, 06:47 PM
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Penni,
You should definately post up where/who this company is, these people have to learn.
Companies like this are almost certainly the same ones that lack customer care in other areas.
If they are part of a chain or a franchise we could get them into serious s**t.
You should definately post up where/who this company is, these people have to learn.
Companies like this are almost certainly the same ones that lack customer care in other areas.
If they are part of a chain or a franchise we could get them into serious s**t.
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26 January 2000, 08:57 PM
#11
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It's taken half an hour to click but I now know what a MCP is, in fact I think I might be one!
If you think this is funny then you may be one too!
With the arrival of the new "drive-thru" cashpoint machines,customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.The following recommended procedures have been drawn up.
MALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to the cash machine
2 Lower car window
3 Insert card into machine and enter PIN
4 Enter the amount of cash
5 Retrieve card,cash and receipt
6 Raise window
7 Drive off
FEMALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to the cash machine
2 Reverse back to align car window to the machine
3 Restart the stalled engine
4 Lower the window
5 Find handbag,empty contents on to passenger seat and locate card
6 Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear-view mirror
7 Replace contents of the handbag
8 Attempt to insert card into machine
9 Open car door to reach machine due to excessive distance from car
10 Insert card
11 Re-insert card the right way up
12 Re-enter handbag to locate diary with PIN on inside back page
13 Enter PIN
14 Press cancel and enter correct PIN
15 Enter amount of cash required
16 Re-check make-up in rear-view mirror
17 Retrieve cash and receipt
18 Empty handbag again,locate purse,place cash and receipt inside
19 Drive forwards two metres
20 Reverse back to cash machine
21 Retrieve card
22 RE-empty handbag ,locate card-holder,place card in slot provided
23 Re-check make-up before attempting to move off again
24 Restart stalled engine and pull away
25 Drive three to four miles
26 Release handbrake
PS No offence Penni (although I think it might be to late)
[This message has been edited by AndyMc (edited 26-01-2000).]
If you think this is funny then you may be one too!
With the arrival of the new "drive-thru" cashpoint machines,customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.The following recommended procedures have been drawn up.
MALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to the cash machine
2 Lower car window
3 Insert card into machine and enter PIN
4 Enter the amount of cash
5 Retrieve card,cash and receipt
6 Raise window
7 Drive off
FEMALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to the cash machine
2 Reverse back to align car window to the machine
3 Restart the stalled engine
4 Lower the window
5 Find handbag,empty contents on to passenger seat and locate card
6 Locate make-up bag and check make-up in rear-view mirror
7 Replace contents of the handbag
8 Attempt to insert card into machine
9 Open car door to reach machine due to excessive distance from car
10 Insert card
11 Re-insert card the right way up
12 Re-enter handbag to locate diary with PIN on inside back page
13 Enter PIN
14 Press cancel and enter correct PIN
15 Enter amount of cash required
16 Re-check make-up in rear-view mirror
17 Retrieve cash and receipt
18 Empty handbag again,locate purse,place cash and receipt inside
19 Drive forwards two metres
20 Reverse back to cash machine
21 Retrieve card
22 RE-empty handbag ,locate card-holder,place card in slot provided
23 Re-check make-up before attempting to move off again
24 Restart stalled engine and pull away
25 Drive three to four miles
26 Release handbrake
PS No offence Penni (although I think it might be to late)
[This message has been edited by AndyMc (edited 26-01-2000).]
26 January 2000, 09:38 PM
#12
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Penni,
Organise an meeting for the lads here and we will go round and have a word in the p*****ks
shell like for you managment style !
(i must be ill ,night in shining armour mode!!)
oh well.
mike
Organise an meeting for the lads here and we will go round and have a word in the p*****ks
shell like for you managment style !
(i must be ill ,night in shining armour mode!!)
oh well.
mike
26 January 2000, 11:15 PM
#13
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Penni,
Despite moving from cave to house and from beating with club to spouting crap , man has not developed much.
Ignore them and paste them next time you pull up next to their Nova at the traffic lights.(Nova undoubtedly with 18" rims and wide rubber to harness all 995cc.)
Touche
Ed
[This message has been edited by EdwardH (edited 26-01-2000).]
Despite moving from cave to house and from beating with club to spouting crap , man has not developed much.
Ignore them and paste them next time you pull up next to their Nova at the traffic lights.(Nova undoubtedly with 18" rims and wide rubber to harness all 995cc.)
Touche
Ed
[This message has been edited by EdwardH (edited 26-01-2000).]
27 January 2000, 12:23 AM
#14
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I posted the story - not so much because I'm pissed off - but because it's a constant source of entertainment - some men not being able to accept -
....love drives 'im presss 'za..
Iron bars too good for them, and funny thing there was a Nova fitting that description in their forecourt..
I just love it... lol
P
27 January 2000, 08:45 AM
#15
Dear Penni,
I know its cruel, but I had to laugh at your story, not because of how you were treated, but becuase of how I imagined your blood must have been boiling! All I can say is - lucky for them you didn't have a tyre iron in your hand!
I now have this wonderful picture in my mind of you taking back with you all these kind men who are offering, with them all dressed in black, wearing sunglasses with slicked back hair (about five should do!), all standing behind you in total silence with their hands clasped in front of them (a la "the management" style!). And you saying "About those wheels, now what colour was it that I wanted...?"
LOL
Mike
Andy,
That was v. funny, will print that off to show my mates!
LOL
Mike
I know its cruel, but I had to laugh at your story, not because of how you were treated, but becuase of how I imagined your blood must have been boiling! All I can say is - lucky for them you didn't have a tyre iron in your hand!
I now have this wonderful picture in my mind of you taking back with you all these kind men who are offering, with them all dressed in black, wearing sunglasses with slicked back hair (about five should do!), all standing behind you in total silence with their hands clasped in front of them (a la "the management" style!). And you saying "About those wheels, now what colour was it that I wanted...?"
LOL
Mike
Andy,
That was v. funny, will print that off to show my mates!
LOL
Mike
27 January 2000, 09:07 AM
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Penni,
If it happens again calmly place both hands on the counter, lean forwards and say:
"Is this some male c*nts joke us female c*nts don't get? 'Cos I'm not ****ing laughing!"
Lock Stock, quotes can me adapted for every situation in life....
If it happens again calmly place both hands on the counter, lean forwards and say:
"Is this some male c*nts joke us female c*nts don't get? 'Cos I'm not ****ing laughing!"
Lock Stock, quotes can me adapted for every situation in life....
27 January 2000, 11:34 AM
#17
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Hi Penni
Here's what you should've done: offer to take them for a "brisk" spin around the locality. They might have realised that being an Impreza enthusiast isn't a function of chromosome-count.
Better luck next time
-= mike =-
Here's what you should've done: offer to take them for a "brisk" spin around the locality. They might have realised that being an Impreza enthusiast isn't a function of chromosome-count.
Better luck next time
-= mike =-
27 January 2000, 11:32 PM
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AndyMc...
sorry to be a pedant but most cash tills have logic inbuilt that will not dispense the cash/receipt until the card is first removed - still very amusing though...
...endured a comparable incident recently at local
'safeburys' - person concerned was confused as to why the machine kept refusing the in-store loyalty card that was being shoved in instead of a cashtill card - I tried not to look impatient while standing behind - why do such people always finish one transaction, let the machine give the card back, and then insert it again to do the next transaction?
next prejudice - grannies who go to the post-office at lunchtime and hold up all the people who are on their lunch break... since incontinence forces them to get up at the crack of dawn, why the heck do they have to collect their pensions at 12:00 ???
cheers,
Paul W, in intolerant mode
sorry to be a pedant but most cash tills have logic inbuilt that will not dispense the cash/receipt until the card is first removed - still very amusing though...
...endured a comparable incident recently at local
'safeburys' - person concerned was confused as to why the machine kept refusing the in-store loyalty card that was being shoved in instead of a cashtill card - I tried not to look impatient while standing behind - why do such people always finish one transaction, let the machine give the card back, and then insert it again to do the next transaction?
next prejudice - grannies who go to the post-office at lunchtime and hold up all the people who are on their lunch break... since incontinence forces them to get up at the crack of dawn, why the heck do they have to collect their pensions at 12:00 ???
cheers,
Paul W, in intolerant mode
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