f1_fan

iTrader: (9)

Rape victim meets her attacker in prison to forgive him

There are some extraordinary people in this world and Katja Rosenberg is among them.

Yes she needed some closure as they call it, but to consider his situation, forgive him and give him an overall positive message for the future.... not many people could do that!

JTaylor

Top woman!

ditchmyster

iTrader: (7)

She's a better man than he is that's for sure!

I think she should have introduced his private parts to an axe.

thenewgalaxy

And to think that the thought of plunging a knife inbetween his ribs would be so much more satisfying. I even feel like doing it on her behalf, that poor woman.

I don't think I could forgive someone who had done something so bad to me as that. But I hope that with time I would be able to if it did.

More class and dignity than the majority of people that have ever walked this earth, let alone are on it at the moment.

The Trooper 1815

iTrader: (31)

+1 .

AndyBaker

+2

I wonder if he knows what it's like to be violated after spending some time in the showers there.

RobsyUK

iTrader: (2)

After raping her he raped another woman.. Wonder if she knew this

Ellie*

He was a 16yr old boy though.

I wonder if she'd still feel so forgiving had he been a grown man, not a child who was struggling to live with whatever happened in his childhood?

I also think her maturity and her age (in terms of having a more secure sense of self and esteem) may have helped her to deal with it and be able to let go of the anger and obviously sympathise with him?

Tony Harrington

iTrader: (8)

True forgiveness fully releases the victim, until that point is reached the offended rather than the offender is imprisoned sometimes for life unless they experience breakthrough

pimmo2000

iTrader: (6)

Outstanding and good to know the ****er got a sentence and not benefits.

john banks

Christian teaching suggests unforgiveness is harmful to the victim. Other than anecdote, or reference to the bible, is there any good quality independent evidence to support the dogma, or could it pressurise victims to forgive?

Saxo Boy

Forgiveness is a word...how do you feel forgiveness. I don't think this women ever 'forgave' this man, rather, I think she never internalised feelings of hate and dispair and has effectively been at peace (relatively speaking) with the whole thing. Strong women like.

JTaylor

There's some research here, Dr. Banks:

http://learningtoforgive.com

http://www.forgiving.org

john banks

Both links show an illusion of research to back up their preconceived mandates, rather than trying to prove the null hypothesis. The exclusions, lack of proper controls and dubious endpoints, or just reporting a research protocol do not provide evidence of effect that is robust.

For example, if you perform an intervention on one group and nothing on the control group, then you do not show that forgiveness based techniques are superior to other techniques. If you exclude victims of crime or abuse, then you cannot draw conclusions about the use of the intervention in victims of crime or abuse.

Ellie*

That was kind of my train of thought.
In that situation she is a mature woman, he was a child. I think she may have had the strength and understanding to not let what happened rip her apart and so she is able to forgive.

When that is reversed, it's usually a different outcome.
As a young and/or psychologically vulnerable person who is maybe still developing their personality and confidence, to have an adult do that to you, it really ****s with your mind too much to even contemplate the other side of the equation, nevermind forgiveness.

Ellie*

Also, some people don't deserve forgiveness.

The victim can still come to terms with it, and hopefully move on, but I'm not convinced they should be expected to forgive.

Alan Jeffery

It's certainly one means of taking control. Magnaminity can be very useful in a whole lot of situations where you really are the better person.
Revenge can have a bitter aftertaste, unless you've just won an argument by force of reason.