joke
23 May 2002, 04:18 PM
#1
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A new employee is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory. The
personnel Manager explains her duties, and tells her to report to work promptly at 8am. The next day at 8:45am, there's a knock at the personnel manager's door. The assembly line foreman comes in and starts ranting about this new employee. He saysshe's incredibly slow, and the whole line is backing up. The foreman takes the personnel manager down to the factory floor to show him the problem. Sure enough, Elmos are backed up all over the place.
At the end of the line is the new employee. She has a roll of the material used for the Elmos and a big bag of marbles. They both watch as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles, and starts sewing the little package between Elmo's legs. The personnel manager starts laughing hysterically. After several minutes, he pulls himself together, walks over to the woman, and says, "I'm sorry, I guess you misunderstood me yesterday. Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.
personnel Manager explains her duties, and tells her to report to work promptly at 8am. The next day at 8:45am, there's a knock at the personnel manager's door. The assembly line foreman comes in and starts ranting about this new employee. He saysshe's incredibly slow, and the whole line is backing up. The foreman takes the personnel manager down to the factory floor to show him the problem. Sure enough, Elmos are backed up all over the place.
At the end of the line is the new employee. She has a roll of the material used for the Elmos and a big bag of marbles. They both watch as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles, and starts sewing the little package between Elmo's legs. The personnel manager starts laughing hysterically. After several minutes, he pulls himself together, walks over to the woman, and says, "I'm sorry, I guess you misunderstood me yesterday. Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.
23 May 2002, 04:26 PM
#3
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Little Johnny and his family move over from New Zealand to
Australia and Johnny starts school in Grade 2. After the first day he comes home proud as punch.
"M'm, M'm, we dud counting tuday und I counted ull the way tu wnh'ndred. N'ne uv the uther kuds gut p'st twunty"
"Thet's b'cus y'r frum New Zulland, Johnny." says Mum.
The second day Johnny comes home with a smile from ear to ear.
"M'm, M'm, we dud the ulphabit tuday und I wint ull the way from Ay to Zid."
"Thet's b'cus y'r frum New Zulland, Johnny." says Mum.
The third day Johnny comes home and says to his Mum,
"Tuday I was heving a p'ss aginst the wull wuth the uther kuds
und I noticed that my wully uz a lut b'gger thun the uther kuds. Uz thet b'cus I'm frum New Zulland, M'm?"
"No, son. Thet's b'cus yure 18."
Australia and Johnny starts school in Grade 2. After the first day he comes home proud as punch.
"M'm, M'm, we dud counting tuday und I counted ull the way tu wnh'ndred. N'ne uv the uther kuds gut p'st twunty"
"Thet's b'cus y'r frum New Zulland, Johnny." says Mum.
The second day Johnny comes home with a smile from ear to ear.
"M'm, M'm, we dud the ulphabit tuday und I wint ull the way from Ay to Zid."
"Thet's b'cus y'r frum New Zulland, Johnny." says Mum.
The third day Johnny comes home and says to his Mum,
"Tuday I was heving a p'ss aginst the wull wuth the uther kuds
und I noticed that my wully uz a lut b'gger thun the uther kuds. Uz thet b'cus I'm frum New Zulland, M'm?"
"No, son. Thet's b'cus yure 18."
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