Lost my hero yesterday
11 April 2012, 12:09 PM
#1
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Lost my hero yesterday
Phone call at 5:30am yesterday
My grandad had passed away
He went in with a infection in his foot which ended in it being amputated, then he had a cardiac Saturday, but he was critical but stable.
Then he slipped away early hours Tuesday.
I'm totally gutted, to me this guy was a proper legend and I looked up to him so much.
I've had deaths in the family before but this has always been the one Ive had nightmares about and thought he'd be around much longer (65)
I'm coping all not that well have no need to eat or go out and spending most of my day sleeping to stops thinking about it
Sorry for the boring post I know it's not exactly thrilling.
My grandad had passed away
He went in with a infection in his foot which ended in it being amputated, then he had a cardiac Saturday, but he was critical but stable.
Then he slipped away early hours Tuesday.
I'm totally gutted, to me this guy was a proper legend and I looked up to him so much.
I've had deaths in the family before but this has always been the one Ive had nightmares about and thought he'd be around much longer (65)
I'm coping all not that well have no need to eat or go out and spending most of my day sleeping to stops thinking about it
Sorry for the boring post I know it's not exactly thrilling.
11 April 2012, 12:14 PM
#2
Mate, you need to look after yourself, sounds like your becoming depressed and it's a slippery slope.
Get out and see your family, 65 is no age at all, but it sounds like he was a good guy, memories will last.
The pain will always be there, but it'll get easier to deal with.
I'm truly sorry for your loss.
Get out and see your family, 65 is no age at all, but it sounds like he was a good guy, memories will last.
The pain will always be there, but it'll get easier to deal with.
I'm truly sorry for your loss.
11 April 2012, 12:31 PM
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Sorry to hear of your loss. Time is a great healer and you'll eventually think of the good times more than the pain you're suffering now. Go out with a mate or two and have a few beers for him.
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11 April 2012, 01:41 PM
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Ant,
Condolences mate: never nice to lose a cherished family member, especially one you'd identify as being a formative influence on your life, but his passing doesn't mean you lose that - you keep it; that's part of his legacy! A period of shock followed by a period of intense sadness is perfectly normal. Don't lock yourself away though, take advantage of your mates and family - let them help you though it and if you find yourself feeling too sorry for yourself just try and remember that your grandad wouldn't want you to be miserable and would expect you to get on and enjoy life to honor his memory!
Feel better soon!
Ns04
Condolences mate: never nice to lose a cherished family member, especially one you'd identify as being a formative influence on your life, but his passing doesn't mean you lose that - you keep it; that's part of his legacy! A period of shock followed by a period of intense sadness is perfectly normal. Don't lock yourself away though, take advantage of your mates and family - let them help you though it and if you find yourself feeling too sorry for yourself just try and remember that your grandad wouldn't want you to be miserable and would expect you to get on and enjoy life to honor his memory!
Feel better soon!
Ns04
Last edited by New_scooby_04; 11 April 2012 at 01:43 PM.
11 April 2012, 01:42 PM
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Sorry to hear about your Grandad.
I'm not sure you ever really get over something like this, lost my Dad early this year (74) and I still think about him a lot but don't really grieve as such just try to remember good times. I glad we we're able to give him his first grandson before he died, such a shame though as they seemed to have a close bond from the outset but he will not remember him as he's only coming up for one now, only what we tell him, photos, etc.
It gets better with time is all I can say.
I'm not sure you ever really get over something like this, lost my Dad early this year (74) and I still think about him a lot but don't really grieve as such just try to remember good times. I glad we we're able to give him his first grandson before he died, such a shame though as they seemed to have a close bond from the outset but he will not remember him as he's only coming up for one now, only what we tell him, photos, etc.
It gets better with time is all I can say.
11 April 2012, 01:54 PM
#18
Sorry to hear that ant. Its gonna be hard but you need to talk to your closest friends mate and share your pain. In a short time you will be ok mate when you think of all the good times. I lost my grandad 4 years ok now but in my mind hes always there for me
Good luck mate
Thoughts with you and your family
Good luck mate
Thoughts with you and your family
11 April 2012, 06:34 PM
#23
Really sorry to hear about your loss, its not easy to get over something like this but like people say time is a good healer, remember him by all the good times you had and not by the sad way he passed away at the end. Just remember he would want you to be happy.
11 April 2012, 06:51 PM
#24
Hey Ant,
1. This is not a boring post, it's about losing someone you love and it is courageous & I appreciate that you have flagged this up.
2. Grieving is a very important part of the healing process when we lose someone who is very dear to us.
3. How someone grieves is personal and is very different depending on the individual and the relationship with the one they have lost. It's clear that your grandad had a big influence on your life and his loss is a huge shock to you and the family mate.
4. Make sure you don't bottle things up too much and share your thoughts and feelings with someone who you trust as you will find this helpful and therapeutic.
5. Remember to celebrate all the good times about him and the fun times with him.
6. Take a leaf out of his book and let this spur you on to leave your own positive legacy.
Cheers Ant
1. This is not a boring post, it's about losing someone you love and it is courageous & I appreciate that you have flagged this up.
2. Grieving is a very important part of the healing process when we lose someone who is very dear to us.
3. How someone grieves is personal and is very different depending on the individual and the relationship with the one they have lost. It's clear that your grandad had a big influence on your life and his loss is a huge shock to you and the family mate.
4. Make sure you don't bottle things up too much and share your thoughts and feelings with someone who you trust as you will find this helpful and therapeutic.
5. Remember to celebrate all the good times about him and the fun times with him.
6. Take a leaf out of his book and let this spur you on to leave your own positive legacy.
Cheers Ant
11 April 2012, 08:38 PM
#26
Sorry to hear that, 65 is as has been said, no age to go. I saw my Grandad the other day and he is 91 and he is going blind, has Prostate cancer and just seems tired nowadays, still mentally very with it but he seems pissed off due to the sight problems, sad to see him aging like this but your post makes me realise how lucky I am, lost my other grandad at 69 in 1988 and that had a big effect on me, he had a big personality and I learnt the other day he was tol dhe was too old for treatment for his heart problem when now they routinely operate for what he had on much older people, lost my grandma the same year after a hip operation, she had one done, then the other and never really came back, not sure she didnt overdose on sleeping pills to be honest.
Takes a while to get over it, we got back off holiday to find he had died a few days older, don't think you ever get over it but you get used to it and memories are then pleasurable and don't set you off, I wear my grandads wedding ring, I am not masively sentimental but I love having it, have his medals as well, think it is good to keep some objects, even ones that arent valuable that are a link to the past, I have the biscuit tin from my grandparents house still, spent a lot of time in there as a kid, that was why I was a podgy little ****** !
Takes a while to get over it, we got back off holiday to find he had died a few days older, don't think you ever get over it but you get used to it and memories are then pleasurable and don't set you off, I wear my grandads wedding ring, I am not masively sentimental but I love having it, have his medals as well, think it is good to keep some objects, even ones that arent valuable that are a link to the past, I have the biscuit tin from my grandparents house still, spent a lot of time in there as a kid, that was why I was a podgy little ****** !
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