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Old 07 September 2011, 09:35 AM
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davyboy
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Default Can't afford a funeral for your mum?

I think this may wind some of you up

http://www.northamptonchron.co.uk/ne...osts_1_3031628
Old 07 September 2011, 09:40 AM
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what would scooby do
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Pig Feed ?
Old 07 September 2011, 09:46 AM
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Carlh
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Its sad but perhaps the family should get off their a55es and give their mum the burial she deserves or go for a cremation (at least there is no headstone cost).


Or just ship her to africa. She'll feed a family for a few months!
Old 07 September 2011, 09:47 AM
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They have a number of options

Take her to the local tip

Have her recycled

Call Solyent Green

Let the council burn the mother.......
Old 07 September 2011, 09:47 AM
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DIY?

Old 07 September 2011, 10:11 AM
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what would scooby do
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Originally Posted by Trout
They have a number of options

Let the council burn the mother.......


That's just awful.


It would take weeks and think of the CO2 !!!
Old 07 September 2011, 10:20 AM
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Have her stuffed.
Old 07 September 2011, 10:50 AM
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Originally Posted by what would scooby do
Pig Feed ?
Even pigs have standards you know
Old 07 September 2011, 11:14 AM
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I know you're dead and all that, but you know what the undertakers do to the bodies don't you.
Old 07 September 2011, 12:06 PM
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They could actually make some money.

Have her preserved in formaldehyde in a big tank and put her on display.
Old 07 September 2011, 12:29 PM
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The Zohan
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Perhpas they should ask nicely for a loan from the social fund and pay it back over a period of time instead of expecting the tax payer to foot the bill and bitching about it!


By the looks fo them they could miss a few takeaways and ready meals to pay for it and drop a few dozen KG's in the process.
Old 07 September 2011, 01:05 PM
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Surely for these eventualities a cheapo job can be done, cremate and return the ashes in a carboard box with a bag inside, cardboard coffin, no fancy hearse, flowers, service or any of that, surely it cant cost that much, suspect they want a free do, party tea and a few nice flowers at the taxpayers expense. Sorry, but if you are on benefits you are a bit stuck, the old adage "Beggars Cant be choosers" applies, perhaps the mother should have put some money by in case she eventually dies but of course death wont happen to her....

However, I dont think corpses should hang round not dealt with, I think a lot of mortunaries have loads of bodies hanging round like a lost property office.

I think it would be good if they built a big pit, lined and threw all the bodies in to rot down and then take the Gas off to run generators and produce heat and light for the rest of us, I am happy to go in when Im done, lot of good quality protien to break down here and judging by the Methane I produce whilst alive I could keep the whole of the UK going for a few days when dead.
Old 07 September 2011, 01:28 PM
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Originally Posted by The Zohan
Perhpas they should ask nicely for a loan from the social fund and pay it back over a period of time instead of expecting the tax payer to foot the bill and bitching about it!


By the looks fo them they could miss a few takeaways and ready meals to pay for it and drop a few dozen KG's in the process.
look mate its genetic, ok!

they all eat less calories than they burn - its a gland problem

seriously tho

whats the laws on buriels -because i sure dont want to pay any funeral director a single fcking penny.

id much much rather be left in a feild to feed local animals - aslong as my immediate family could deal with it.

itll be a request in my will - and they all know how i feel.

ive eaten enogh animals , to give them a return shot
Old 07 September 2011, 01:54 PM
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In cases like these, they should dress the body in swimwear, sunglasses, hat, and then put it somewhere in the Arctic. Think of the scientists little faces all confused when they discover her in a thousand years time.
Old 07 September 2011, 01:56 PM
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Originally Posted by stara
In cases like these, they should dress the body in swimwear, sunglasses, hat, and then put it somewhere in the Arctic. Think of the scientists little faces all confused when they discover her in a thousand years time.
Old 07 September 2011, 02:01 PM
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Hysteria1983
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When my dad died it wasn't that expensive to get everything sorted, it's only expensive when you use it as an excuse for a knees up.

He has not been buried, neither has he got a plot or headstone of any type. We remember him in our own way.

I am damn sure that those people could have got together and paid for the funeral.

It's their mother FFS!!
Old 07 September 2011, 02:31 PM
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Funeral tend to bring out the worst in people. when my gran died my dads business was struggling but he scraped enough together forgive her a decent send off.his brother on the other hand who was on 150k a year didn't pay a penny and could not even be bothered to turn up.
When my dad died all I got was a message on Facebook saying he could not make the funeral.
Old 07 September 2011, 02:43 PM
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they then learned they were not entitled to the money because another sibling – who they insisted was estranged – works for a living and could theoretically foot the bill.
Case closed. They have obviously tried to have one over on the council and been found out. No doubt this will rumble on for a few more weeks, they will get legal aid, council will instruct their lawyers, and in the end it will all be sorted and prob cost the tax payer £50k.
Old 07 September 2011, 02:44 PM
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Couldn't give a **** tbh Fvckwits !
Old 07 September 2011, 03:08 PM
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Fvkin Parasites wanting us the taxpayer to fork out get to Fvck and get a job you lazy shower of inbreeds
Old 07 September 2011, 07:27 PM
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Originally Posted by jef
look mate its genetic, ok!

they all eat less calories than they burn - its a gland problem

seriously tho

whats the laws on buriels -because i sure dont want to pay any funeral director a single fcking penny.

id much much rather be left in a feild to feed local animals - aslong as my immediate family could deal with it.

itll be a request in my will - and they all know how i feel.

ive eaten enogh animals , to give them a return shot

What animal could gnaw its way through your wiry personage Jef
Old 07 September 2011, 07:39 PM
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worst bit is the funeral directors saying she actually smells better thesedays
Old 07 September 2011, 07:40 PM
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Do i see an expensive leather sofa that "The family of Sylvia Jarvis" are sitting on??

It's a tough old world out there???

mb
Old 07 September 2011, 07:56 PM
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Jesus, just saw she was 53, looks about 80 !
Old 07 September 2011, 08:29 PM
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Why dont they just keep claiming the benefit for a couple of weeks, that'll clear the debt.

I wonder how long the undertakers would keep the body there for before they just do the funeral anyway?
Old 07 September 2011, 08:37 PM
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Originally Posted by J4CKO
What animal could gnaw its way through your wiry personage Jef
personally i like to think of the lions that roam scotland tearing me apart to feed there cubs,

more likley some crows and flies and maggots doing the job, with maybe occasional fox lol
Old 07 September 2011, 08:40 PM
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Stand her up at a bus stop. That's what they do in Macclesfield



Old 07 September 2011, 08:42 PM
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is that a picture of the mum a little way down the page... who would **** that! But seriously how lo0ng will they just hold onto the body,...
Old 08 September 2011, 09:36 AM
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Originally Posted by Hysteria1983
When my dad died it wasn't that expensive to get everything sorted,
I think you need to define expensive.

Several years ago my Mum died - cost almost 3K
1 month later, Dad went too - slight less this time at approx 2.5K (took pity I guess)
Old 08 September 2011, 09:43 AM
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The Zohan
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Originally Posted by urban
I think you need to define expensive.

Several years ago my Mum died - cost almost 3K
1 month later, Dad went too - slight less this time at approx 2.5K (took pity I guess)

I buried my dad some 13 years ago, we where potless, given we had just moved house and i had changed jobs in the same month, all savings gone! We cremated my dad for £1300.00 (from memory) or there abouts' Not a lot of money but all we could afford after i sold my stills camera equipment to pay for it and also the wake which was not a big affair but nicely done and made sure my mother had some financial security whilst going thought the bereavement process.
We show our respect and celebrate his life in other ways than a flashy funeral to impress the mourners.

I think given the state are expected to pick up the tab then it should be as cheap as possible without being disrespectful.

Proper preparation of the body, the service, cheap coffin and cremation should be covered in the most cost effective way. No flowers or cars provided by the state, just the basics otherwise imho this is not good use of taxpayers money which is better spent on the living and those in real need.

If the family have a problem with that then they need to put their money where they mouths are!

Last edited by The Zohan; 08 September 2011 at 11:07 AM.


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