2 nuns joke?
11 July 2008, 09:00 AM
#3
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Substitute 'Where's' for 'Wears'. 
*EDIT* Too slow. DOH!
11 July 2008, 09:02 AM
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Similar to the 2 nuns cycling home when one takes a short cut along a cobbled street. The other says "I've never come this way before". dl
11 July 2008, 09:08 AM
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11 July 2008, 09:43 AM
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Then there's the Nun sat in the bath, when there's a knock on the door and a voice says 'It's the blind man from the village'. Thinking she's safe she invites him in..........You know the rest
11 July 2008, 11:33 AM
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11 July 2008, 11:58 AM
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Two nuns, Sister Mary and Sister Elizabeth are walking through the park when they are jumped by two thugs. Their habits are ripped from them and the men begin to sexually assault them.
Sister Elizabeth casts her eyes heavenward and cries, "Forgive him Lord, for he knows not what he is doing!"
Sister Mary turns and moans, "Oh God, mine does!!!"
Sister Elizabeth casts her eyes heavenward and cries, "Forgive him Lord, for he knows not what he is doing!"
Sister Mary turns and moans, "Oh God, mine does!!!"
11 July 2008, 12:08 PM
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11 July 2008, 12:29 PM
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Two nuns, Sister Mary and Sister Elizabeth are walking through the park when they are jumped by two thugs. Their habits are ripped from them and the men begin to sexually assault them.
Sister Elizabeth casts her eyes heavenward and cries, "Forgive him Lord, for he knows not what he is doing!"
Sister Mary turns and moans, "Oh God, mine does!!!"
Sister Elizabeth casts her eyes heavenward and cries, "Forgive him Lord, for he knows not what he is doing!"
Sister Mary turns and moans, "Oh God, mine does!!!"
Sister Elizabeth asks, "What do you mean, raped twice?"
"Well we're going back that way, aren't we?"
11 July 2008, 02:31 PM
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Or the young nun who's distressed. Mother superior asks what happened.
"I've been graped" she sobs
"Don't you mean raped?" replies Mother Superior.
"No, there was a bunch of them"
bdm.tsh!
ithangkew!
take my wife!
"I've been graped" she sobs
"Don't you mean raped?" replies Mother Superior.
"No, there was a bunch of them"
bdm.tsh!
ithangkew!
take my wife!
11 July 2008, 03:30 PM
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Remember the Bobbit fella who's missus cut his wanger off some years ago?
It's not widely known the after she cut it off, she threw it out of the window and it bounced off the windscreen of a car being driven by two nuns.
One turned to the other and sais "Christ, did you see the size of the **** on that moth"
It's not widely known the after she cut it off, she threw it out of the window and it bounced off the windscreen of a car being driven by two nuns.
One turned to the other and sais "Christ, did you see the size of the **** on that moth"
11 July 2008, 04:14 PM
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One of my favourites:
A bus full of Nuns is along a dangerous mountain road and its brakes give out around a particularly tight corner and crashes down into a ravine where it explodes, all of the Nuns are killed.
The Nuns arrive at the exclusive Nuns entrance to Heaven where they meet Saint Peter who is standing next to a font which is filled with Holy Water.
Saint Peter greets the Nuns and asks the first one in line, "Is any aspect of you impure in some way?"
The first Nun replies, "Well... I did once see a man's *****..."
Saint Peter tells her not to worry as the Holy Water will purify her vision, he then splashes some of the Holy Water onto her eyes and allows her into heaven.
He asks the second Nun the same thing who replies "I did once... touch a man's *****." Saint Peter then dips her hands in the Holy Water to purify her touch and then allows her into Heaven.
Saint Peter is then about to ask the third Nun the question when the Nun at the back charges through the line to the front looking very exasperated.
Saint Peter quickly asks, "What is the matter sister?"
The Nun replies "I just want to gargle it before Sister Susan dips her **** in it!"
A bus full of Nuns is along a dangerous mountain road and its brakes give out around a particularly tight corner and crashes down into a ravine where it explodes, all of the Nuns are killed.
The Nuns arrive at the exclusive Nuns entrance to Heaven where they meet Saint Peter who is standing next to a font which is filled with Holy Water.
Saint Peter greets the Nuns and asks the first one in line, "Is any aspect of you impure in some way?"
The first Nun replies, "Well... I did once see a man's *****..."
Saint Peter tells her not to worry as the Holy Water will purify her vision, he then splashes some of the Holy Water onto her eyes and allows her into heaven.
He asks the second Nun the same thing who replies "I did once... touch a man's *****." Saint Peter then dips her hands in the Holy Water to purify her touch and then allows her into Heaven.
Saint Peter is then about to ask the third Nun the question when the Nun at the back charges through the line to the front looking very exasperated.
Saint Peter quickly asks, "What is the matter sister?"
The Nun replies "I just want to gargle it before Sister Susan dips her **** in it!"
11 July 2008, 04:20 PM
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The problem with the two nuns joke is that it was never obvious why you'd use a bar of soap for that purpose, because you wouldn't. I therefore also laughed nervously the first time i heard it and then found out why it was supposed to be funny some time later...
12 July 2008, 08:13 AM
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