paulr

You'll never walk alone is the Liverpool anthem.Well its just common sense really.
Would you walk around Liverpool alone?


The look on their little faces,Christmas morning in Liverpool
http://www.nowaste.act.gov.au/styles...nityredbin.jpg

paulr

what do you call a midwife who won't deliver scouse babies


A crime prevention officer.

Chip Sengravy

A prostitute goes up to a scouser, and says " would you like a *******? "

Scouser says, " dunno like, will it affect me dole money? "

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

Its funny how certain sections of society are still fair game in theis PC world, Gingers and Scousers for example, try doing a joke about about another minority and see how long the thread and your membership lasts !

Anyway, some more please.

rik1471

It is a double standard - I agree.

OllyK

So when are the jokes going to start

* * * KEV * * *

iTrader: (5)

One day Robbie and Steve were playing footy in the local park. The two kid's were having so much fun that they didn't see the rotweiller running towards Robbie. The dog then suddenly jumped up and attacked Robbie. Acting on instinct, Steve picked up a big stick they were using as a goal post and hit the dog as hard as he could. The dog then fell to the floor in a pool of blood and died. A man who had seen the event walked over to the lads and introduced himself.
"Hello, i'm John and i'm a reporter for a popular newspaper and I just saw what you did to save your mate there".
The reporter then added "I can just see the headlines now, 'MAN UTD FAN SAVES MATE FROM ROTWEILLER' ".
Steve said "No I don't support Man Utd".
"O.K. then, 'MAN CITY SUPPORTER SAVES MATE FROM ROTWEILLER' " say's the reporter.
"No I don't support City either" say's Steve.
The reporter then asks "Well who do you support?".
Steve replies "Liverpool".
"Right then" say's the reporter "SCOUSE SCUM KILLS DOG IN VICIOUS ATTACK".


It was a saturday afternoon in Manchester and United were playing Liverpool. In the United changing room Fergie was giving the pre-match team talk.
"Right lad's, I know Liverpool are crap so today I will play just Dwight Yorke and all the rest of us will go down the pub."
The lads leave Yorke to play the match and go down the pub. At full-time the lads go back to Old Trafford and Yorke is sitting in the changing room crying.
Fergie asks "What was the score Dwight?"
Dwight replies "1-0 to United".
Fergie is puzzled and so he askes "well why are you crying?"
Dwight replies "I got sent off after 5 minutes".



Q - What do you have if you've got 100 scousers up to their neck's in sand?
A - Not enough sand.

lucylastic

Why wasn't Jesus born in Merseyside?
Because God couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

What's long, scouse, and goes around corners?
The Dole queue.

Man walks into a shop in Liverpool:
Man: Can I have a pair of tights for my wife?
Shop assistant: Certainly Sir, what size head are you?

warrenm2

Yeah I did, and got mugged twice, once with a knife to my throat.....

Chip Sengravy

class!

JamieMiller

What do you call a Scouse girl in a white shell suit?
The bride.

yoza

Oh, my sides are splitting....

Bubba po

Yoza, do you have a Type R, or an Arrr, eyyy?

lampshade

Dont mind the scouser jokes TBH, but what really winds me up is PPL who laugh at the notion of scousers and tracksuits.

Quick history lesson for ya.

Back in the late 70's, early 80's Liverpool FC were kings of football playing all over europe, and the traveling fans brought fashion back to the UK, you lot were all wearing drainpipe trousers and Hi Tec trainers FFS, and when the rest of the UK saw the traveling kop wearing Fila, Kappa, S/T Le cost [sp] etc etc. they all wanted part of it, and that's when your sports/leisure shops were born.

Bubba po

And that's a GOOD thing, is it?

SwissTony

iTrader: (19)

Couldnt resist



Scouser on a bike


Scouse office chair


Keyboard


Mum


all old...

msi

Side splitting indeed

Be honest, you just made that up didn't you?

paulr is just pi$$ed because they drew barcelona

warrenm2

Errrr..........