wez_sti

in central london, about 2am, absolutely dying for the loo, no public toilets or anything for miles, so i have a whizz in some remote corner, away from where anyone would ever walk and where it would cause no bother...

a few seconds into relieving myself a fooking riot van screeches up and 3 coppers in stab vests etc.. jump out and jog towards me!

i 'finish' and go over to em. they look at me as if i've just crapped in their mums lap and start giving me a lecture on how disgusting i am. talks down to me like the most sarcastic and upperty copper ever.

then starts to tell me how he's going to write me a ticket for £40 for anti social behaviour!!!

surely a riot van in one of the biggest cities in the world could be put to better use!?!

they spent 15mins looking for the right form to charge me but they couldnt find it!!!

knowing i'd got off i gave them all a 10min lecture on how they should be embaressed, think they realised what a waste of time it was and they tried to justify it.

peeing in the street is pretty gross and not something i particualy approve of, but i was desperate, the other option would of been to **** myself!?!? is that was they expect me to do?!?!

Big Den

well I'm pissin myself laughing

brihoppy

IIRC, if you take reasonable steps not to expose your 'person' (legal speak for your wanger), then you cant be done for exposure, and if you take reasonable steps not to outrage public decency, ie pee on a tree and not in a shop doorway, then you committ no offence...

ajm

I saw something similar on some low budget fly-on-the-wall police documentary on freeview. This town has a dedicated unit to hunt down street peeing. They have a van with a water tank and hose and make the 'offender' scrub the pavement whilst they hose it down. If they refuse they get a ticket!

wez_sti

you could be right, they normally bank on people not knowing the law...


was actually quite wound up at first, then just round it funny that they would spend 1/2 an hour of there shift dealing with someone who never causes any trouble and always talks to police with respect, even when wasted!

gave them a fake name and address anyway!! he heeeeee!

wez_sti

i'd spray em with the hose then run!! (their hose not mine!)

SJ_Skyline

I bet that pissed them off!

wez_sti

it did!!! the guy was desperate to charge me, which made it all the more satisfying when i found out he couldnt!! had a big grin on my face, he prob wanted to pepper spray me!

Regacy

I work in Hammersmith.
I park in a private car park with a short alleyway to reach the street.
Everyone uses it as a toilet, I have regularly found people peeing in there in the daytime, and twice it was women.
it is disgusting, I get it on my shoes and in the summer it stinks.
You've had control of your bladder from about age 2, so it's very simple....don't do it.
FIND a toilet, go before you come out or just don’t drink as much.

wez_sti

theres an alley opp where i work where people do the same, i agree its disgusting, but this was a 'must go now' situation, not a 'oooh the toilets are 10yards away cant be bothered to walk' situation!

was completely out of the way where no-one would be walking.


was funny watching all the girls at V-festival squating in every avail corner as the queues for the toilets were so big!

jjones

OMFG, women have to pee?

JTaylor

BexTait

There was some guy a mate of mine saw peeing on the street when drunk. He went and stood next to a wall with a vehicle parked and peed facing the wall (vehicle hiding him from passers by). What he failed to realise was that the vehicle was occupied by 2 policemen, and it was a proper police car parked where it was lit too. As he started to pee, the policemen turned on their spot and directed it at peeing man, casting huge shadow of him pissing on the wall. The guy just kept on at his business, semingly oblivious to the fact that his act was being displayed to anyone looking. As he finished and zipped up, the Police stepped in and did him (once they'd composed themselves)

ajm

You probably gave him a dose of bed bugs too!

New_scooby_04

iTrader: (4)

Could be worse, they might take the "toilet training a pet approach" and rub your nose in it!

NS04

Big Den

Lucky you didn't have a 'fall' severely hurting yourself while in their presence!

hedgehog

While this is not something I would agree with I can also understand how in some cities, perhaps even a town you don't know, in the middle of the night there really is no other option.

A chap I worked with some time back was caught out in a similar manner while travelling to a job and went down a back alley in the early hours of the morning. As if by magic a police officer appeared and he ended up with a serious problem as there was discussion that his name might go on the sex offenders register. Now, this didn't happen and I have no idea what the conditions would have to be for it to happen but it is worth keeping in mind that there is a (probably very slight) possibility of quite serious consequences. Of course maybe this was just something they told him to scare him. Does anyone know if it could actually happen that you end up on the sex offenders register for having a pee in the middle of the night?

Puff The Magic Wagon!

iTrader: (2)

Stick a large CCTV box with a little flashing LED & that'd soon stop...

ajm

I guess it could be possible if you were charged with indecent exposure.... although they would have to properly 'fit you up' in order to make it look like you had whipped out your johnson with the express purpose of causing someone distress!

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

Great...typical...shut down all the public toilets and THEN enforce the laws on urinating in public

How backwards can this country get?

Leslie

It always used to be law that if you were in charge of a horse and cart you were allowed to have a pee by the side of the road. I believe that was extended to the driver of a car.

I don't know if it still applies.

Les

wez_sti

Oi!!!!

just remembered, my mate had a worse incident in amsterdam, was completly out of it, peed on the back of a car (now that is disgusting!!) only to find out it was a parked up police car!! got called 'a disgrace to his country' by the coppers and narrowly avoiding a night in a cell!

being called a disgrace in amsterdam takes some doing!!

he also sh@gged 6 h00kers that night and in the end coulnt get it up!

classy guy!!

magicdudey

Now stop getting cocky!

fatherpierre

Pissing in the street is an £80 fine - so count yourself doubly lucky

wez_sti

yeah, thats what it is in essex aswell.


dont see why its ok for paula radclife to do it in front of millions in the middle of the street, but not for me at 2am out of the way!!?!

Brendan Hughes

King Eric

Why dont they fine cats for pissing in the street?

wez_sti

where the f*ck would they keep the money?? actually dont answer!!

GC8

If you are a Drey driver then you may relieve yourself against the wheel of you vehicle. This hasnt been repealed as far as Im aware.....