POC

Assuming some of you dont mind getting your hands dirty (no comments Tel! )

Whats the most idiotic/stupid thing you have ever done while working on a car?

For me, it was about 6/9 months ago....

I was changing the clutch on one of the scoobies, decided to get out from under the car so I reached up and grabbed one of the wheel spokes, stupid me forgot that the wheels were off the ground and it would spin freely! Wheel span round with my fingers gripped round one of the spokes..... so with most of my bodyweight hanging off this and the inertia in the wheel itself, my finger got cruched between the spoke and the wheel caliper OMG, I could have puked it hurt so much!

Another one would be when I was undoing the lower wishbone on a subaru, I remeber thinking at the time that what I was doing didnt feel right but couldnt think why.... 2 seconds later the wishbone swang down and chinned me..... ****!!!

Think both of those were in the same day too. I distinctly remeber TweenieRob pi55ing himself at each one

Any tales?

corradoboy

I remember my brother wondering how much more oil his Opel Manta would need before the dipstick showed full. Seems there was more than one dipstick. Of course, you can guess where the sump plug was.

I once didn't move the axle stand far enough away when lowering the car from the jack. Crunch! Doh!

dnb

I fitted the cam belt pulleys on backwards on my mother-in-law's rover. It didn't run too well after that.

I've also done the jack thing. Not a pretty site!

There's loads more, but fortunately not many nasty injuries (yet).
It's house DIY that gets me - stabbing my hand with a very sharp chisel hurt a bit.

[Edited by dnb - 1/9/2004 1:08:53 PM]

ajm

I think the worst thing I have done is, after changing the brakes, tighten up the wheel bolts thumb tight, lowered the car to the ground and completely forgot to tighten them up! I drove off with the locking wheelnut adapter still stuck in the wheel bolt and all the bolts thumb tight.

Several miles later I started wandering if I had tightened up the caliper properly because every time I braked there was a *clunk*

lost the locking wheel nut adapter too

richs2891

I've done the change the wheel trick, put the nuts to finger tight, go inside to get some gloves as its cold. In the mean time my dad had let the card down off its jack and disappeared in the car ! One frantic phone call later resolved the situation. Still blame him not asking if I finished or not.
Managed to drop a back box on me whilst changing it, due to the rubber exhaust mount twisting off its stand.

Richard

Poor Guy

my dad was working on his spitfire messing with the heater unit.

had his hand behind the dash and suddenly started swearing and shouting.
his new tissot metal strap watch had made a circuit and burned all round his wrist. looked Very painful!

damian666

Pulled out the swingarm linkage on my Kawasaki (ok, so its a bike) forgetting that it would be impossible to compress the suspension to get it back in again!

Eventually ended up putting a jack underneath the swingarm and getting 2 polish guys go 'jump' at the right moment. Once I got that in, I realised I hadn't put the drive belt back on for the rear wheel.

Out came the bolt again

Damo

BOB.T

I was a mechanic for 9 years so I've got too many to list

I think the best would be when I killed a Mondeo It was in for repairs, it had severe rear end damage so I'd stripped everything from the rear doors backwards, off the car...suspension, the lot! A mate and I were underneath taking the tank out, as the car was on a top post lift the balance was upset and unbolting the tank was the final straw, the car nose dived into floor, much to the amusement of those around!

We both got out OK but the car was totalled:0

New To Scoob

Removing the std brake lines on my old 309gti, pulling on one of those stupid spring clip things peugoet use to hold the banjo hose in, with mole grips, yup clip came out and I proply trapped hand hand between the edge of the grip and the garage floor, result lots of wincing and a rather large blood blister.
Same car, changing the front suspension, whole car about 2' off the ground, got the strut out then let the hub assembly drop, forgetting that the whole front of the car was in the air and not just one side, result driveshaft popped out closely followed by most of the G'box oil, one not very impressed father at the state of his garage floor.
Mates Stock car, old MK2 escort, setting the timing up while the engine was running, forgot the coil was mounted on the bulkhead to prevent it from getting broken, put my bare forearm right across the terminals as he was revving the engine, result big zap and dead arm for me.

Loads more I'd rather forget.

John.

chiark

If Tweenierob's laughing at you, just ask him how to configure email... That'll be a laugh

Silliest thing I've done? Got my hand stuck in the dash by pushing my hand through the ash-tray space to retrieve a wire.

Getting out of that removed only about 5 layers of skin on the fleshy bits of my hand

Gridlock Mikey

Not cars but Challenger Tanks!

Took a hull drain plate off. This involved lying under the vehicle with a 13mm socket and undoing 12 bolts. As you can imagine lying on your back using a rachet, the old lactic acid thing kicks into ya shoulders biceps etc.
NAAFI Wagon came so i stopped the job, got a pie or summat, ate it and then crawled back under the tank. I thought I still had 2 bolts left but i only had 1.
The drain plate on a challenger weighs about 5lbs as I undid the last bolt, thinking there was another holding it, It dropped onto my sternum, I reacted and sat up, smacked my head on the bottom of the hull and then got covered in all the crap that came pouring out of the engine bay.
How i didn't drown I have no idea. I crawled out from under the tank covered in oily/muddy goo looking blacker than usual
Funny with hind sight but at the time it wasn't took me nearly 3 weeks to stop smelling like a Main Battle Tank

Mikey

alcazar

iTrader: (2)

Many years ago my first car was a 105E Anglia.
I scrimped and saved and finally had enough for a cheap car radio, which I fitted.
It crackled when the engine was running, so I set about suppressing it.

One of the suppressors was inline in the king-lead from coil to distributor. I was about to cut the lead when I realised I couldn't see very well, as it was getting dusk, so I switched on the headlights to reflect off the garage door.
Then I worried about the battery going flat, so started the engine to keep it charged.

THEN I cut the lead

I picked myself up from out of a rosebush beside the car, and my old boy almost wet himself laughing when I told him.

Alcazar

damian666

Mikey,

You gotta love that 'gearbox oil' smell.

Suresh

During my teenage years of car ownership: Remember putting a screwdriver through my hand whilst trying to prise open a battery terminal connector. Was fitting a new battery which had slightly larger terminals than the old one.

The screwdriver was sticking out the back of my hand by a couple of inches. Luckily it was freezing at the time, so the pain was a little numbed by the cold.

To add insult to injury, once I got back from hospital I found that the car wouldn't even start owing to me having connected the terminals the wrong way around. Blew the radio too. Doh!

misty

Changing the cam belt on a mates escort (cvh) thought I'd tighten the cam centre bolt with a hammer and chisel!!! Only snapped the feckin camshaft didn't I!!!OOOOOUUUUCCCHHH!!!! £105 for new cam kit.
dave

[Edited by misty - 1/9/2004 1:37:14 PM]

Andy Tang

iTrader: (3)

hmmm...

Dismantling a P1 light to trail fit it to my car!

I was taking the light out of the bracket and it wouldn't come free. I pushed it against the ground and with most of my body weight managed to pop it off, the problem was the retaining plastic clip came straight up at my eye!

It smashed my hard gas permable contact lense, some of it fell out of my eye and the rest stayed in!

I tried for 15 minutes to get it out before getting my brother to run me down to A&E! I saw the dotor who popped the rest of the lense out in about 10 seconds!

XT

I was underneath the car changing the oil filter on my Lancia Thema, the bloody thing was so tightened that the car fell of the jack while i was trying to untighten it, good thing there weren't any engine parts above my head

On-The-Wagon

Not me, and not car-related...er, why am I posting then??

My dad was up a ladder using a power drill, stretched too far and fell off, drilling a hole through his ankle.

It wasn't helped when my aunt tried to help. She had heard that salt was good for healing wounds, but rather than cleaning the wound with salted water she poored salt directly onto it...poor dad, we still have the indent of his head in the ceiling tile...

V45DSM

When I was 17 and on my first car (Orion Ghia I) one of the pipe fittings on the fuel distibuter sheared. To ensure that I bought the correct part, I cut the plastic pipe before one of the others, removed it and took it to the garage. It turned out the fittings and the line are sold as one and I had to pay £27 to replace the damaged one and then £39 for the one I chopped.

Muppet.

dr_ming

Standing in a pit under my Opel Ascona with a guy from my dad's garage. He's welding a hole in the exhaust pipe. Next thing I know, a jet of burning fuel lands between my feet - he't just cut the plastic fuel line in half with the welding torch . Fortunately, being a student, the tank was not that full (so not too much pressure) - managed to blow out the flame. Nearly shat myself though!

jamin

I changed the fuel pump on my GTi-R but found some of the pipe work had persihed so tried to free up some more by fiddling round with my screw driver underneath the fuel tank....
The screw driver went straight through a fuel pipe and I had to get the car taken to the local garage on a flatbed...oh how they laughed

V45DSM

A guy a work reckons he tired to siphon petrol out of a van using a Hoover and blew the back of it out.

yoza

I lowered a car down on a four poster ramp, with the drivers door open.

The door made contact with a large oil drum, and bent the door somewhat. Turned a PUG 309 door, into a Lamborgini style door.

Also a bit off subject, I drove through the Mersey Tunnels with two mountain bikes on a roof rack. I wizzed though into the pay styles, arm out the window, pound in hand.........CRUNCH.

I ripped the two mountain bikes off the roof, complete with bike rack and roof gutter rails.

I didnt see the height restriction sign! In fact I lie, I did see it, but it didnt register. If you know what I mean.

The car nearly lifted off the floor, and to add insult to injury, they charged me for the damaged barrier.[img]images/smilies/mad.gif[/img]

Later Thicko....

[Edited by yoza - 1/9/2004 2:31:04 PM]

EddScott

Another GTIR horror story regarding the fuel lines. I spent 2 days trying to replace about 5" of fuel line which had perished.

I could get a driver in to tighten the Jubilee clip so had to use a small ratchet handle and one click at a time to tighten it up. Complete nightmare.

Funny one was changing the sump on my old E30 bmw. Took all the bolts out and it stayed put. went to find something to give it a nudge whilst still under the car and it came away and hit the ground with a loud bang. I paniced and thought the car was falling on me. Jumped out from underneath and my friend who was helping a the time was in stiches.

SiPie

Fixed a split fuel line on my old VW Beetle (in a bid to get me home) with insulating tape

Petrol + Insulating tape = perished insulating tape > engine fire

Rebuilt engine with oversized rings etc and er it seized within 8 miles

Therefore > Repeat above

Great thread..... keep em comin'

Edited to add that I once syphoned petrol from a certain anonymous farmlike vehicle when I was a bit skint and running low on fuel near Aviemore and after I'd poured a considerable amount in, I then clicked that it was diesel ... d'oh

[Edited by SiPie - 1/9/2004 3:21:50 PM]

DAC

sawing thro petrol pipe on a Dolomite Sprint I was stripping

went straight thro my oily/greasy finger - had to have cleaned etc before anaesthetic.
wife all but fainted (as she does at sight of blood) - me in agony.

(as everybody - one of many)

not repair - but tried to turn works transit pickup around on a country lane, reversed up small banking - it slid down resting on back of body - with front end 1 inch from a brick wall - wheels spinning

grovesy

My mates 1.3 E plate Astra kept over heating so he asked me to look at it. After replacing theromstat, gasket and new housing filled it up with water and anti freeze. Started it up and waited over heating again...hhmmm at this point another mate has a look at it... "grovesy where's the fan belt" DOH!

scooby-tc

iTrader: (2)

I once did an oil change on my old WRX immediately after getting it home from a 400 mile round trip.Needless to say the oil was so hot im surprised i had any skin left we live and learn

windyboy

One time I removed the front offside wheel from my [shame] Lada Samari [/shame off] for some reason but while I was refitting the wheel I tightened the wheel nuts with the wheel brace without hand tightening them first. Needless to say I cross threaded them and eventually they all worked loose one by one, the wheel fell off and the car ground to a halt digging a track in the road as it did and the wheel carried on without me for several hundred yards. Luckily I wasn't driving to fast as I knew something was wrong and thought that I would get home before something happened.
It wouldn't of been too bad but all this happened just I drove past a group of the local kids and they found it highly amusing.

Windyboy.

PETENAUD

One time i was messing about doing something to me front brakes on my disco, so i put my mobile phone on the top of the rear tyre so i knew where it was.

Brake job finished and went for a test drive, result, mangled phone.

God i was thick that day


loved the one with the salt pmsl