Leslie

Really glad your mum seems to be coming round Snazy, keep working on her! I understand why you are saying all the other tings too-hope you can get the message across to your daughter successfully.

Les

Snazy

Cheers Les

Spent most of the morning with her today, getting her out and about, and had a quick bite for lunch out too.
Burger King!! Can you believe it?? Where do you wanna go mum? I fancy a burger she says!! lol

Pub lunch burger, Harvester or something. No she says, McDonalds is fine!! Now I know she is ill hehe.

Im a man on a mission now

Leslie

Glad to hear it Snazy-stick with it-I know you can convince her.

Les

B-B

Snazy like many others I am sure - I am following your thread and send you best wishes for your Mum. You have support on here from many friends.

Best wishes to others getting through this too.

B-B

Snazy

thank you mate
2 days til the appointment with the consultant again. clock is ticking so to speak.

Cheers Les, im plotting every day to find more ways

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Sorry for the thread hijack, but a little update from me.

After the appointment last week, a letter from the hospital has arrived with Mam's appoinment. It's tomorrow. I know a quick appoinment is not necessarily a bad thing, but I can't help being quite worried now, she is the same. We've talked and I'm trying to keep her positive, but on my own I'm scared.

Sorry for being depressing. Just thought I'd share my feelings a bit.

Snazy

No no fair play, its nice to hear from others, sad as the story is.
Hope all goes well at the appointment for her, please do let us know if you feel ok about it.

Quick appointments are a good thing. Could just be a quiet time, or they are taking the matter seriously, as it should be.

All the best for her

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Thanks Snazy, I'll keep you up to date. I can't really explain how I feel right now, but it is great to know there are people like you out there that I don't even know really, who are giving support. Thank you.

B-B

Lisawrx - you have support all round you. Dont ever bottle it up - keep talking. Hope it goes well tomorrow.

Sara

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Thanks Sara. I can't help bottling things up, it's what I seem to be so good at. You, and so many others on here are great people, I am so greatful for that.

Thank you for wishing well for tomorrow, I hope me and Mam have been worrying about nothing. Whatever the outcome, no matter how I feel, I will help her get through this. I just might end up relying on you guys for a bit of help along the way.

B-B

Your Mam is lucky to have you there, whatever the outcome this is a scary time all round.

Lean all you need.

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Thanks hun, I might need to.

I don't think very good of myself as it is, but I'm glad I might be of some help to her here, as if all she had was my brother, she'd be fooked, he couldn't even get her a Mother's Day card and has no idea what is going on now as he never bothers with her.

I will be there for her through thick and thin, and just hope that will help her.

Snazy

Lisa, my mum is in tomorrow too for her follow up, test results and discussions about treatment, so know how you feel. I would be ignorant not to offer support at a time like this.
At the end of the day you are who you are. Dont beat yourself up or try and make yourself into someone you are not. Im sure your mum will appreciate you for being who you are.... her daughter

Good for you for standing by her

little-ginge

Snazy & Lisa- will be thinking of both of you (and your mums!!) tomorrow - hope everything goes well.

Lisa - it might be a cancellation appointment which your mum was lucky enough to get allocated..

Whichever way it came about, look at it this way - the sooner she has it done, the less time you have to wait worrying, whilst an appointment comes through, and ultimately the sooner you get answers

For anyone who is going through difficult times atm..

My dad has had to wait for appointments, and operations and the waiting is an indescribable period of worry and stress.

the what ifs, the worry, the stress are constantly running through your mind -it's horrendous. Those of us who have already been through it, or are currently going through it can appreciate exactly what you are feeling right now - lean on us all you need - if we can help, we will in anyway
xx

Snazy

Cheers for that.
Just done a Jerry Springer moment on my blog
Heart felt sentiment in the closing lines.

Will update it again tomorrow afternoon/evening

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Snazy,I hope it goes ok tomorrow for you too. My thoughts are truely with you.

LG, thank you for your kind thoughts, I'm sure you are right about how quick it's been for an appointment.

I'll also keep you up to date on what's going on as Snazy will too.

Again,thoughts are with you Snazy, and a real big thank you for all the kind words.

Snazy

I shall indeed, clock is ticking 5 hours til the appointment. Thinking of your mum today hun

Blog will be updated when I know something more.

Scoobychick

iTrader: (1)

Lisa, Snazy, although (touch wood) I've not been through this kind of thing yet I'll be thinking of you both today. You both know I'm here if you need a shoulder, they're very broad

Snazy

Cheers my lovely
"its a normal day, its a normal day" I keep telling myself.

Sadly one that has started of rather badly grrrrr

Leslie

Lisa and Snazy, my very best wishes to you both and your mums. Keeping my fingers crossed for you all.

Lisa, thank your lucky stars it is a quick appointment and also they have to act very quickly as part of the govt decree over all this. Does not necessarily mean anything to be extra worried about.

Les

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Thank you all for the knid words, they mean so much to me. Well back from the appoinment, and it turns out she has nothing to worry about. She had the mammogram, and a scan, and both were normal. We can both breathe a big sigh of relief now. I am so relieved for her, but the wimps that we are still had a good cry together.

Snazy, you and your Mam are in my thoughts. My love to both of you.

Scoobychick

iTrader: (1)

That's great news Lisa

little-ginge

Lisa - fabulous news Big hugs to you & your mum - a good cry helps relieve all those pent up emotions

Snazy - am thinking of you, hope things went ok.

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Thanks guys (well girls ) I just really hope that things have turned out well for Snazy too.

Snazy

Cheers guys

Small update here. Hardly the greatest news, but some news is better than no news eh.

Snazy's Space

ritchie21

Well, not as bad as it could have been but still worrying for you I know.

Snazy, just remember that doctors are only a small part of this....your mum is a huge part and I really can't stress enough how important it is to keep her in a positive frame of mind. I remember when my dad was given less than 12 months initially...he was on the phone (having just received his appointment to see his specialist for a month later) asking for an earlier appointment when the receptionist told him it wasn't long to wait!!!! He promptly replied "well it is when i've only got 12 left overall". He counted down every minute/day/etc until his doctor visited him and gave him a bolloc king! He was told if he carried on with his attitude he wouldn't last three months....as I said he quickly changed and lasted 4 years 3 months after terminal diagnosis.

It's not easy and you have tougher times ahead....I will be thinking of you and your mum throughout and will be hoping that everything is ok. Remind your mum that she can still enjoy her life and do everything you can to remind her why she should be here with you. Don't waste a moment of the time you have with her, I still always wonder if I could have done more with my dad.

Keep positive and help your mum to stay positive too (I'm sure you will just trying to talk from experience).

Good luck!

Lisawrx

iTrader: (1)

Snazy, as Ritchie says the only thing you can really do at the moment is remain positive, and try and keep your Mam in good spirits. I know you are going through an incredibly difficult time right now, but I'm sure you will both come through this. I can only say I'm thinking of you right the way through this, and I (as others) am here if you need me, it really is good to talk, and I couldn't be more greatful for the support from all of you.

The treatment offered at this time may only be the start. When Mam got loads of info back last year I remember reading that depending on different factors, Chemotherapy is sometimes offered initially (to shrink the cancer, I think) and operations can follow on from that, so there is still the possibility, the chemo isn't going to be the end of treatment, it may just be necessary right now, before other options can be looked into. Obviously I'm no expert, but it's worth keeping in mind this may just be the beginning of alot of possibilities.

As for the consultant, Mam's was incredibly blunt too, I think they have to be because it is such an emotional issue, and they have to keep it together, to offer the most professional, and best advice and information.

It is good to hear, your Mam is coming round to the idea of treatment, however reluctantly, good on her. Again I'm thinking of you, and best of luck.

Snazy

The full prognosis is basically, its terminal. The chemo has been offered as the ONLY form of treatment for her, on this lump anyway.
They want to do scans etc to see if there is development anywhere else too.

Due to the progression of the inital lump there is nothing that will "cure" it so to speak.
Everything is being rushed right now, so treatment starts asap.

Long term, there is no time on it at this point in time, although she is keen to get a gauge of what sort of time span she is talking. Still avoiding telling her sister about it right now, til she knows more.... keeps moving the goal post on this one.

Right now, im fine. Daft as it sounds, but for the last 2 years I have been preparing myself for her passing, after finding her almost dead, due to her COPD. So right now, with her in "good health" its actually easier to work with.

Lots of joking about, sick as it might sound, but running through the Ten things to do before you die. Her #1... rob a bank lol !!
So all in all, in good spirits. My role right now, keep her calm, keep her on track, and most of all, make sure I do the best I can for her.

Cheers once again for the openess Richie, its refreshing to hear first hand experience without over inflated opinions on here for once I can only hope we get the same sort of luck. I think the first time things will actually start to tick im my head is when a time gets mentioned. Guess it would do that to anyone.

Difficult for me right now, having not worked for over 3 months, then getting this news, it makes me not want to go back now, not til I know whats going on with her. If time is short, I wont return to be blunt about it. So while trying to keep a cool head about all my work issues, I have to try and focus on this too. Nightmare lol.


Hope this all makes sense without being too depressing

ritchie21

Like I said, it's all going to depend on your mum's attitude and that's where you come in!

Humour really does help! Even when you think it won't.

Be honest and open with each other but please please remember that she aint dead yet!! You will have moments of tears and anger (they will come I promise you) but you will have time to do your grieving when and if she goes. Please don't do it while she's still with you. Just make the most of now and tell her exactly what she means to you.

I've had experience of losing loved ones both suddenly and after a long illness and whilst both are extremely hard and there are things I desperately wish my dad was here for (like giving me away at my wedding), I'll always know that I said everything to him that I ever wanted or needed to and when he died, my dad knew just how much I loved him.

I hope Snazy that I'll still be reading updates about your mum for a long time yet!

Snazy

Cheers mate. I am no stranger to showing emotion, expressing myself or speaking my mind. As well as sharing my life (an some SN members know and get bored of lol) I can assure you I wont write her off yet, give up on her, or act like its all over. It aint over til the fat lady sings as they say
I share my feelings very openly with her these days, have done for a few years now.

Keeping mums attitude strong is key to me right now, and I think the concern I am showing her right now, is driving her to do more to stick around so to speak. Silently convincing her that someone loves her and cares enough to remain here for a while.

Humour, for me finding humour in a bad situation is something I am good at or very bad at, depending your take on things. But again messing around like telling her last week that this is the lamest excuse she has made to dodge Xmas yet, really make her laugh, and take things at face value, rather than spending a day reading into things way too much.

I hope to be writing these updates for a long time yet too mate, as long as I possibly can. She will be famous before long im sure hehe.

Just emptied my mind onto my blog, some of it might make no sense at all to some people, but for those on the same level as me, for those with depth to their thought.... I hope it does... Snazy's Space