RobJenks

Dark day for Scottish Football -- Who Dares Burns, Thursday, June 17, 07:35:10pm
Thursday evening was indeed a dark day for Scottish football, as England beat Switzerland 3-0. Before the game masses of Scots gathered in the bars of Glasgow, Edinburgh and Wick to look forward to their big night and reminisce on Scotland's greatest nights of footballing pride, such as England losing to Germany and Argentina on penalties. But things did not go according to plan.
"We're gutted" said fans spokesman Hamish McSpecialbrew, as the wonderful friendly Tartan Army left the bars with their tails between their legs, "It's a bad night for us".
Scottish FA spokesman Jock McTennentssuper said that it was indeed a bad night for Scottish football. "It was hard to take, just like the night when England beat Argentina in the World Cup" he said between several drinks.
Suicide rates attributed to bitter inferiority complexes are expected to rise over the next few days, and the emergency services are on standy to deal with the deluge.
Scotland's greatest footballing moment was in 1992, when England failed to qualify for the European Championships, but even memories of their finest hour could not cheer up the red noses as they trudged off home, probably via the off licence and the deep fried mars bar shop.
"Y'fugginbazza!" one yelled, before falling over in to a gutter, "Y've all spoilt mah neet!!!"


Thanks to Who Dares Wins.

Suresh

LOL.
Brilliant.

Diablo

That is excellent

(And thats coming from a Scot)

Funnily enough though, no one up here really gives a toss

(Sorry to **** on your parade )

D

Brendan Hughes

And don't forget - they haven't given a toss since Bannockburn - it's all been a friendly wind-up (for 700 years).



For the record, I saw 20 minutes of the game (the second quarter), and England were frankly embarrassing.

(BTW, this is actually the players I'm talking about, rather than the fans)

Diablo

That'll be a first then

Redkop

It was fecking embarrassing to watch. The air was blue here, with a few of us watching it... Most popular saying of the night was... FFS

Jye

A win is a win, good on em anyhow (mutter, mutter)

CrisPDuk

If they play like that in the next game, Croatia are going through

sti-04!!

THE WHAT ????

the second quarter, what sport are you watching ??????????

SiPie

In a typically Scottish fashion the 'darkest day' (IMHO) could be the glorious defeat of Holland in 1978 where we go out on Goal difference after Gemmill's wizardry (PS That's better than Owen's lucky toe-poke v Argentina by the way) if you really want to start

or

Our stunning ability the very same month to scrape an impressive 1-1 draw with Iran

or

Only losing so narrowly to Peru

You see Rob .... we really don't care cos we know we are ****e where as you lot genuinely think you are good

PS FYI Deep fried mars bars taste much better eaten cold the next morning when washed down with Irn-Bru and Haggis cordial

Good luck v Croatia .......... honest

jasey

Speaking as a White Settler I think we both know that you "speak with Fork Tongue"