Speeding On BBC News
03 February 2000, 06:24 PM
#1
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The police have just stated on BBC news that people will only be procecuted at over 35 in a 30 limit, 46 in a 40 and 79 on a motorway.
It was also stated that driving at night on empty roads would be taken into consideration.
Are we starting to see some sense at last?
There was a chap stoped speeding by a vascar fitted speed check device, guess what car it was?
Yep an Impreza (was it you?)
It was also stated that driving at night on empty roads would be taken into consideration.
Are we starting to see some sense at last?
There was a chap stoped speeding by a vascar fitted speed check device, guess what car it was?
Yep an Impreza (was it you?)
03 February 2000, 06:38 PM
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well I hope they are tollerant of fast night driving - on my way back from our Mini car Meeting - I was in the impreza and passed a jam sandwich that was pulled up in a law by - I was going a ickle too fast - whooops - they never caught up with me though - musnt grumbbbbble !
03 February 2000, 07:21 PM
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I'm sure alot of police do use common sense when passing judgement on speeding motorists but to hear this on national TV is reassuring. However, speed limits are still there for a reason so 30,40 and 70mph should still be treated as so.
03 February 2000, 09:05 PM
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Reza,
Speed limits are a load of cobblers. In some cases they are right, in others completely wrong. The "problem" is that you can't easily vary the speed limit on a stretch of road to take into account the conditions (OK, they tried with the M25).
Driving past a primary shool in the morning at 30MPH does *not* make sense, but if you did, there's naff all you could be done for, since you were obeying the speed limit. Conversely, at 3am on a dry night going up a dead straight 4 lane motorway you can be done for doing 79MPH, yet the stretch of road is perfectly safe at 150MPH.
In the absence of being able to alter speed limits with the prevailing conditions, a compromise must be found.... sometimes it's right, sometimes it's wrong. The point is that the Police have stated that they won't be robots when dishing out fines and will look at the circumstances to determine whether the use of speed was *inappropriate*. This is surely a good thing, no?
FWIW, you'll be unlucky to be pulled for anything less than 85MPH on a motorway. I was once pulled doing 95 *because my lights were flashing* [dicky alternator]. Conditions were an empty motorway at night.... no ticket was issued.
Cheers,
Pat.
Speed limits are a load of cobblers. In some cases they are right, in others completely wrong. The "problem" is that you can't easily vary the speed limit on a stretch of road to take into account the conditions (OK, they tried with the M25).
Driving past a primary shool in the morning at 30MPH does *not* make sense, but if you did, there's naff all you could be done for, since you were obeying the speed limit. Conversely, at 3am on a dry night going up a dead straight 4 lane motorway you can be done for doing 79MPH, yet the stretch of road is perfectly safe at 150MPH.
In the absence of being able to alter speed limits with the prevailing conditions, a compromise must be found.... sometimes it's right, sometimes it's wrong. The point is that the Police have stated that they won't be robots when dishing out fines and will look at the circumstances to determine whether the use of speed was *inappropriate*. This is surely a good thing, no?
FWIW, you'll be unlucky to be pulled for anything less than 85MPH on a motorway. I was once pulled doing 95 *because my lights were flashing* [dicky alternator]. Conditions were an empty motorway at night.... no ticket was issued.
Cheers,
Pat.
04 February 2000, 01:23 AM
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Hey John, the car was <B>not</B> an Impreza. It looked like one of those Proton crap mobiles or something similar.
The Scooby is getting a bad name as it is without help from incorrect recognition.
It's about time there was a more formal statement regarding speed limits. Common sense is much better than Zero Tolerance.
[This message has been edited by Acker (edited 04-02-2000).]
The Scooby is getting a bad name as it is without help from incorrect recognition.
It's about time there was a more formal statement regarding speed limits. Common sense is much better than Zero Tolerance.
[This message has been edited by Acker (edited 04-02-2000).]
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04 February 2000, 07:46 PM
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I remember reading somewhere that common sense was finally called into play because there were concerns that there would be a motorists revolt !
Due to all of the unpopular anti-car measures introduced over the last couple of years, it was thought that a large number of people would elect to take the matter to court and clog up the legal system completely....
I personally feel that common sense on speed limits is sorely missing (i.e. 30mph past schools, heavy rain etc). Having said that, if you can pass a school in London at 30mph in rush hour, you are either in a helicopter or using a ramp to "do an Evel Keneval" over the abandoned MPV's and 4x4's
Thanks
Gavin
Due to all of the unpopular anti-car measures introduced over the last couple of years, it was thought that a large number of people would elect to take the matter to court and clog up the legal system completely....
I personally feel that common sense on speed limits is sorely missing (i.e. 30mph past schools, heavy rain etc). Having said that, if you can pass a school in London at 30mph in rush hour, you are either in a helicopter or using a ramp to "do an Evel Keneval" over the abandoned MPV's and 4x4's
Thanks
Gavin
05 February 2000, 12:50 AM
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Just a theoretical one this! What happens if a mr L.Christie decides whilst on his morning jog to go for a bit of a sprint in a 20 mph zone and plod are there with a speed gun ?
Just curious!
Just curious!
05 February 2000, 11:24 AM
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Pat,
What happens if you have a blowout at 150mph, which is quite possible given the speed.
I don't think most people would stand a chance of regaining control of their car. So the motorway might be a bit wider than normal and completely free of traffic but you would more than likely be killed. On the race track the chances of a similair problem are similair but you have added protection, helmet, racing harness and role cages not to mention gravel traps, tyre walls, things you don't get on the public road.
I also don't understand what you mean by driving past a primary school at 30mph is not making sense. Do you mean this is too quick for the area or not. Alot of places now have 20mph speed limits in towns and near schools as I'm sure you are well aware. Let me know what you mean by this.
Rez
What happens if you have a blowout at 150mph, which is quite possible given the speed.
I don't think most people would stand a chance of regaining control of their car. So the motorway might be a bit wider than normal and completely free of traffic but you would more than likely be killed. On the race track the chances of a similair problem are similair but you have added protection, helmet, racing harness and role cages not to mention gravel traps, tyre walls, things you don't get on the public road.
I also don't understand what you mean by driving past a primary school at 30mph is not making sense. Do you mean this is too quick for the area or not. Alot of places now have 20mph speed limits in towns and near schools as I'm sure you are well aware. Let me know what you mean by this.
Rez
05 February 2000, 12:26 PM
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Absolutely certain John.
I had taped the news 'cos I saw the trailer about speeding but wanted to watch something on the other side. I, like you, thought it may have been a Scooby at first, but closer inspection showed no SUBARU badge (but then imports don't have them <B>normally</B>), indicators at the top of the light cluster, different shape light cluster, angled boot edge rather than straight down.
I'm now going to hang my anorak up in the hall.
I had taped the news 'cos I saw the trailer about speeding but wanted to watch something on the other side. I, like you, thought it may have been a Scooby at first, but closer inspection showed no SUBARU badge (but then imports don't have them <B>normally</B>), indicators at the top of the light cluster, different shape light cluster, angled boot edge rather than straight down.
I'm now going to hang my anorak up in the hall.
06 February 2000, 01:34 PM
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Reza,
If you have a blowout at 150MPH then you've got problems :-) Just don't hit the brakes! If it's a front, you'll have a few seconds of serious concentration, trying to keep the car on the road. But, of course, if you want to do 150MPH then you should be using good quality (Z-rated) tyres, in which case the odds of a blowout (given that your tyre pressures are correct) are very slim. Anyone got any stats for how many S-02 PPs have gone pop at hign speed?
Odds of being killed on an empty 4 lane motorway are pretty slim... you'de have to do something very wrong to cause the car to impact with something or roll....
Point about Primary School is axactly what you state... 30MPH is *TOO FAST*. These kids don't yet have a thorough appreciation of the dangers of the road and can, and do, run out onto roads without looking. The point is to keep to a speed such that you can stop in the distance you can see.... "what if a kid runs out behind that van you're passing ?" Personally, I'de rather be late than to flatten an innocent school kid!
John,
valid point about the Autobahn. Thing is that these motorways are built for the purpose of having cars run on them with the only speed limit of redline in top gear. You'll get the occasional one topping 200MPH.... many others *cruising* at 150MPH.... but driver training does play an important role.
In Germany, both night and motorway driving are compulsory as part of driver training. It's a huge contrast to the situation (as it was when I did my test) here where a learner COULD NOT go on a motorway, yet a newly qualified driver could... next time when on the Autobahn, observe the simple little things that help... good lane discipline... staggered cars (you can watch the car in front of the car in front of you!), people actally checking the rear view mirrors before pulling out [hey, when there may be a car approaching 100MPH faster than you, you *check*, ok? :-)] etc etc. Again a large contrast to the lane hogging idiots across here.
Cheers,
Pat.
If you have a blowout at 150MPH then you've got problems :-) Just don't hit the brakes! If it's a front, you'll have a few seconds of serious concentration, trying to keep the car on the road. But, of course, if you want to do 150MPH then you should be using good quality (Z-rated) tyres, in which case the odds of a blowout (given that your tyre pressures are correct) are very slim. Anyone got any stats for how many S-02 PPs have gone pop at hign speed?
Odds of being killed on an empty 4 lane motorway are pretty slim... you'de have to do something very wrong to cause the car to impact with something or roll....
Point about Primary School is axactly what you state... 30MPH is *TOO FAST*. These kids don't yet have a thorough appreciation of the dangers of the road and can, and do, run out onto roads without looking. The point is to keep to a speed such that you can stop in the distance you can see.... "what if a kid runs out behind that van you're passing ?" Personally, I'de rather be late than to flatten an innocent school kid!
John,
valid point about the Autobahn. Thing is that these motorways are built for the purpose of having cars run on them with the only speed limit of redline in top gear. You'll get the occasional one topping 200MPH.... many others *cruising* at 150MPH.... but driver training does play an important role.
In Germany, both night and motorway driving are compulsory as part of driver training. It's a huge contrast to the situation (as it was when I did my test) here where a learner COULD NOT go on a motorway, yet a newly qualified driver could... next time when on the Autobahn, observe the simple little things that help... good lane discipline... staggered cars (you can watch the car in front of the car in front of you!), people actally checking the rear view mirrors before pulling out [hey, when there may be a car approaching 100MPH faster than you, you *check*, ok? :-)] etc etc. Again a large contrast to the lane hogging idiots across here.
Cheers,
Pat.
06 February 2000, 08:35 PM
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Pat/Reza
German Autobahn's do have speed limits, typically 120kph near major junctions and areas where there are a number of slip roads or incidence of heavy congestion. They also tend to have a blanket speed limit of 80 - 100 when it's wet. In addition the roads are often less well maintained than UK, with the added hazard that they are frequently 2 lane. The standard of driving is about equivalent to a UK m'way on a weekday.
Having said all that I'm off to Germany tomorrow and I plan to be driving at an indicated 155 (mph) as much as possible!
Gaffer
German Autobahn's do have speed limits, typically 120kph near major junctions and areas where there are a number of slip roads or incidence of heavy congestion. They also tend to have a blanket speed limit of 80 - 100 when it's wet. In addition the roads are often less well maintained than UK, with the added hazard that they are frequently 2 lane. The standard of driving is about equivalent to a UK m'way on a weekday.
Having said all that I'm off to Germany tomorrow and I plan to be driving at an indicated 155 (mph) as much as possible!
Gaffer
06 February 2000, 10:30 PM
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I agree with Pat.
I really and truly dont think that the government are concerned about driver and public safety. Money money money. Speed cameras, toll booths, extortionate parking fines; not to mention petrol and car tax. Instead of using up all our resources on these pathetic restrictive devices, why dont we go to the heart of the matter and introduce some form of driver development? By increasing awareness through correct education, we can drastically minimise our problems in the UK.
For christ sake, you dont even get compulsory motorway training in the drivers tests. Kid passes his test and has absolutley no idea what to do on a motorway.
My petty annoyances:
1) Why is it that when someone fails their driving test the 4th time, they are allowed a re-test as many times as possible? Do we get 4 opportunities in real life to avoid a potentially fatal accident? No, so why are they allowed on the road? They obviously cant drive! Keep them off the road! That TV celebrity woman really peed me off. 16 times she failed (something like that) and she was still allowed to retake her test!
2) OAP's. I am about to touch a nerve here with some people, but as I said before, todays roads need split second reactions and instinctive responses from the driver. Can we afford to have people on the road that no longer have the acute awareness required to drive in modern day roads? I am no wonder driver, but I am sure that my reactions have saved me from what could possibly have turned into messy situations.
3)Buses. The government urge us to use buses to save on transport pollution and essentially combat the effects of global warming and turn UK into a 'better' place. Have you seen the amount of SHI.T that these busses churn out from their exhausts? I work, live and play in the center of London and when I go home sometimes (ladies close your ears) I blow my nose and it is completely black!
and worse of all, my top annoyance of ALL TIME is:
BASTA.RD MOTORWAY MIDDLE LANE HOGGERS!!!!!
AAARRGGHH
IF YOUR NOT OVERTAKING, MOOOOOVE OVEEEER!!!!
AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!
NUMBER 1 CAUSE OF UK TRAFFIC JAMS ON MOTORWAYS.
*puff pant puff pant.*
Doctor: Come along now, take the blue smartie.
Cem: Yes Doctor, i'll take 5
I really and truly dont think that the government are concerned about driver and public safety. Money money money. Speed cameras, toll booths, extortionate parking fines; not to mention petrol and car tax. Instead of using up all our resources on these pathetic restrictive devices, why dont we go to the heart of the matter and introduce some form of driver development? By increasing awareness through correct education, we can drastically minimise our problems in the UK.
For christ sake, you dont even get compulsory motorway training in the drivers tests. Kid passes his test and has absolutley no idea what to do on a motorway.
My petty annoyances:
1) Why is it that when someone fails their driving test the 4th time, they are allowed a re-test as many times as possible? Do we get 4 opportunities in real life to avoid a potentially fatal accident? No, so why are they allowed on the road? They obviously cant drive! Keep them off the road! That TV celebrity woman really peed me off. 16 times she failed (something like that) and she was still allowed to retake her test!
2) OAP's. I am about to touch a nerve here with some people, but as I said before, todays roads need split second reactions and instinctive responses from the driver. Can we afford to have people on the road that no longer have the acute awareness required to drive in modern day roads? I am no wonder driver, but I am sure that my reactions have saved me from what could possibly have turned into messy situations.
3)Buses. The government urge us to use buses to save on transport pollution and essentially combat the effects of global warming and turn UK into a 'better' place. Have you seen the amount of SHI.T that these busses churn out from their exhausts? I work, live and play in the center of London and when I go home sometimes (ladies close your ears) I blow my nose and it is completely black!
and worse of all, my top annoyance of ALL TIME is:
BASTA.RD MOTORWAY MIDDLE LANE HOGGERS!!!!!
AAARRGGHH
IF YOUR NOT OVERTAKING, MOOOOOVE OVEEEER!!!!
AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!
NUMBER 1 CAUSE OF UK TRAFFIC JAMS ON MOTORWAYS.
*puff pant puff pant.*
Doctor: Come along now, take the blue smartie.
Cem: Yes Doctor, i'll take 5
06 February 2000, 11:29 PM
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Sunlip,
SORRY BUT you've missed the point competely.
1) Most older drivers never had to take a test EVER . . . so how are they considered safe? Not by me they're not!
2) No eyesight test required. Completely ridiculous. Example
late last year the guy in North Manchester who caused a kid's death ('cos he COULDNT SEE ANYTHING). The STUPID idiot judge let him off his sentence because HE WAS OLD?????? BIG consolation to the family. Big dis-incentive to anyone else. NOT.
As I've said before on here - the law is an *** and in this country does not protect the innocent. Magistrates and the police are just political puppets nowadays (not the police blokes fault - they don't make the rules remember).
Personally I'd be VERY happy to take a simple driving exam & eye test every 3/5 years after reaching 60 (& I'm nearer than most of you!!)
A car CAN be a lethal weapon - it should be properly licenced.
Paul
SORRY BUT you've missed the point competely.
1) Most older drivers never had to take a test EVER . . . so how are they considered safe? Not by me they're not!
2) No eyesight test required. Completely ridiculous. Example
late last year the guy in North Manchester who caused a kid's death ('cos he COULDNT SEE ANYTHING). The STUPID idiot judge let him off his sentence because HE WAS OLD?????? BIG consolation to the family. Big dis-incentive to anyone else. NOT.
As I've said before on here - the law is an *** and in this country does not protect the innocent. Magistrates and the police are just political puppets nowadays (not the police blokes fault - they don't make the rules remember).
Personally I'd be VERY happy to take a simple driving exam & eye test every 3/5 years after reaching 60 (& I'm nearer than most of you!!)
A car CAN be a lethal weapon - it should be properly licenced.
Paul
06 February 2000, 11:50 PM
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Sunilp you tart,
Unfortunately, we all have to exercise the 'Practice what you Preach' philosophy, so yeah, I would be more than happy to take a re-test when the time comes.
Yours should be coming up soon, eh?
Cem
Unfortunately, we all have to exercise the 'Practice what you Preach' philosophy, so yeah, I would be more than happy to take a re-test when the time comes.
Yours should be coming up soon, eh?
Cem
07 February 2000, 12:25 PM
#21
German autobahns - please be careful out there!
I lived in Switzerland until last September and commuted through Germany to the "in-laws" in Holland at least 4 times a year (900 miles round trip). Would be fair to say I have some experience of autobahns!
*Rant mode on*
IMHO German drivers are not the perfectly trained machines they are made out to be. Take a look at the number of 50yds+ skid marks on the bahn down there. I reckon there are at least one set per mile of motorway. Also consider the 100 car pile up, which happened in early January this year, because people were tailgating at high speed in fog. 70 people were seriously injured and 4 actually died.
I have experienced the sharp end of superior teutonic training, having being rear-ended in a stationary traffic jam near Karlsruhe at around 60 mph.
Germans are good 'speed' drivers? My hairy ar$e!! Reckon uk m/ways are far safer. Believe the stats prove it too. Anyone??
Still have the whiplash injury after 3 years to prove it. Used to play squash twice a week before the crash, but now have played twice since. Ah. in case you were wondering, the superior German conpensation system paid out a whopping £700 in damages. About 6 months supply of tabs @ uk prices! The girlie got £1800 compensation for 3 years of misery, but she doesn't smoke, so can't possibly think what to do with such a windfall . . . .
*Rant mode off*
I confess to having got 130 out of a Pug 306 2.0 16v down there at X-mas and will be driving scooby to Zurich in March during my end of term break - a detour via Hermany is an absolute certainty!
Be careful.
Suresh
I lived in Switzerland until last September and commuted through Germany to the "in-laws" in Holland at least 4 times a year (900 miles round trip). Would be fair to say I have some experience of autobahns!
*Rant mode on*
IMHO German drivers are not the perfectly trained machines they are made out to be. Take a look at the number of 50yds+ skid marks on the bahn down there. I reckon there are at least one set per mile of motorway. Also consider the 100 car pile up, which happened in early January this year, because people were tailgating at high speed in fog. 70 people were seriously injured and 4 actually died.
I have experienced the sharp end of superior teutonic training, having being rear-ended in a stationary traffic jam near Karlsruhe at around 60 mph.
Germans are good 'speed' drivers? My hairy ar$e!! Reckon uk m/ways are far safer. Believe the stats prove it too. Anyone??
Still have the whiplash injury after 3 years to prove it. Used to play squash twice a week before the crash, but now have played twice since. Ah. in case you were wondering, the superior German conpensation system paid out a whopping £700 in damages. About 6 months supply of tabs @ uk prices! The girlie got £1800 compensation for 3 years of misery, but she doesn't smoke, so can't possibly think what to do with such a windfall . . . .
*Rant mode off*
I confess to having got 130 out of a Pug 306 2.0 16v down there at X-mas and will be driving scooby to Zurich in March during my end of term break
- a detour via Hermany is an absolute certainty!Be careful.
Suresh
07 February 2000, 09:59 PM
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If you were driving at 30mph past a school and the police saw you they could pull you for any nunber of offences (being stupid sounds about right), the speed limit is the max speed allowed under law not acrte balnce to travel at that speed reagrdless of conditions and circumstances (70mph in thick fog, 60mph round 90right, etc)
I don't know if they could do you under the law but they would certainly give you the ollocking to end all
I don't know if they could do you under the law but they would certainly give you the ollocking to end all
08 February 2000, 12:09 PM
#23
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With regard to driving past a primary school at 30MPH, as I mentioned before, it is legal, and you can't be done for it. If some cop tries to do you for dangerous driving, simply point out that you were adhering to the speed limit *they* have set as being safe. [there are such things as urban limits slower than 30MPH, y'know!]. They'll have a hard time defending their own position if it came to court.
Speaking of which, they could start giving you a lecture... again you could say "are you going to charge me? no? then stop wasting my time! good day gentlemen!" again, there's not much they can do. Is this right? *NO*, of course it isn't. It only proves that the Law is not always right, far from it!
As for variable limits with the conditions... IIRC, there is no automatic lowering of limits like there is on the Continent, but I could be wrong on that. As mentioned before, the fastest safe speed is that which allows to stop in the distance you can see. If you have trouble seeing the end of your bonnet, it's not a good idea to be doing 70MPH, but IIRC, it is legal as long as you have your fog light on. Sensible? I think not!
With regard to German drivers... yeah, they're not perfect, no-one is. There's some complete and utter morons out there just like there are some here. There's some good drivers out there, just like there are here. There's some black rubber streaks on the motorways out there... funny how they seem to be just as common here (although shorter). But on the whole, I'de say that the standard out there is somewhat better than it is here, notable exceptions accepted. Also you can and do get done for lane hogging, or going *too slow*.
Cheers,
Pat.
Speaking of which, they could start giving you a lecture... again you could say "are you going to charge me? no? then stop wasting my time! good day gentlemen!" again, there's not much they can do. Is this right? *NO*, of course it isn't. It only proves that the Law is not always right, far from it!
As for variable limits with the conditions... IIRC, there is no automatic lowering of limits like there is on the Continent, but I could be wrong on that. As mentioned before, the fastest safe speed is that which allows to stop in the distance you can see. If you have trouble seeing the end of your bonnet, it's not a good idea to be doing 70MPH, but IIRC, it is legal as long as you have your fog light on. Sensible? I think not!
With regard to German drivers... yeah, they're not perfect, no-one is. There's some complete and utter morons out there just like there are some here. There's some good drivers out there, just like there are here. There's some black rubber streaks on the motorways out there... funny how they seem to be just as common here (although shorter). But on the whole, I'de say that the standard out there is somewhat better than it is here, notable exceptions accepted. Also you can and do get done for lane hogging, or going *too slow*.
Cheers,
Pat.
08 February 2000, 12:26 PM
#24
John: "The police have just stated on BBC news that people will only be procecuted at over 35 in a 30 limit, 46 in a 40 and 79 on a motorway."
Has this not always been the case. The plod used to allow 10% + 2 mph over the speed limit to alow for inconsistencies in speedo readings? Although this was never official
Has this not always been the case. The plod used to allow 10% + 2 mph over the speed limit to alow for inconsistencies in speedo readings? Although this was never official
08 February 2000, 12:33 PM
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Johnfelstead
I am not forgetting that on some German "autobahns" you can go as fast as you want, but I was referring to the speed of 150mph+ being unsuitable for "U.K" roads, as this post was started on the basis that the police would only prosecute you if you were approximately 12% over the speed limit. I just think that with the typical layout of our motorway system, the quality of tarmac ,the banking next to hard shoulders and occasionaly very windy climate that 150mph is a bit risky.
I agree on the other comments by fellow Scooby regulars that the standard of driving and basic tuition is of a higher standard abroad.
New subject: I don't think an increase in motorway speed limits can be justified until proper training for learner drivers on motorways and high speed car control is brought in by thr DVLA.
Pat,
Thankfully the SO-2s on our Impreza have never gone pop despite occasional indulgences!
I am not forgetting that on some German "autobahns" you can go as fast as you want, but I was referring to the speed of 150mph+ being unsuitable for "U.K" roads, as this post was started on the basis that the police would only prosecute you if you were approximately 12% over the speed limit. I just think that with the typical layout of our motorway system, the quality of tarmac ,the banking next to hard shoulders and occasionaly very windy climate that 150mph is a bit risky.
I agree on the other comments by fellow Scooby regulars that the standard of driving and basic tuition is of a higher standard abroad.
New subject: I don't think an increase in motorway speed limits can be justified until proper training for learner drivers on motorways and high speed car control is brought in by thr DVLA.
Pat,
Thankfully the SO-2s on our Impreza have never gone pop despite occasional indulgences!
08 February 2000, 12:46 PM
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The main problem with doing 150 would be that you'd be drinking so much petrol so quickly that, with prices what they are, you wouldn't go that quick because you couldn't afford it. I got 17.7mpg this weekend. Not funny. (OK, it was good fun using it)
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