Jaybird-UK

Cant we have these people put down or something?

These are real 999 calls....

they were supposed to deliver it two days ago and it hasnt turned up

Black cat has come into my house

I want to know what year the internet first came out I can't remember

My wife's left me two salmon sandwiches which was left over from last night

that there's a grey squirrel with no hazelnut trees

corradoboy

Simple, £500 fine for each act of stupidity. I've always found that the bigger the stick, the less likely people are to want to be hit by it.

JonMc

iTrader: (51)

More worryingly these retards don't realise that their acts are putting lives at risk

Jaybird-UK

I have a friend who works for the ambulance service, and that very same idea has been discussed many times. The reason why they would never is it may end up deterring genuine emergency callers from ringing in because they were scared of a fine, especially so of the elderly.

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

Well my new bed arrived on Thursday, so no 999 calls from me.

I think we need a ratard emergency hotline for these people, say dial 111 because you think someone else needs to give a s**t, it will be in the form of a automated computer queuing system playing a mix of 90's pop "dance" including Vengaboys, Tecnohead and Scatman. Which then leads to a lone semi-deaf call operator located in India called Balgit. Calls will be charged at £10/min, minimum hold time 30minutes.

999 operators upon realising they are talking to a genetically labotomised retard can then transfer any of these idiots directly to that line freeing them up deal with proper emergencies.


There will also be a silent emergency number "222" which plays Lionel Richie's "Hello" as hold music and the line leads to a silent meditation room based in a Buddhist monastery. Again, 999 workers can transfers calls to this line. Calls will be charged at £5/min minimum hold time 60minutes.

David Lock

I used 999 once when I saw a chap climbing up the drainpipe heading for my neighbour's window.

Great response and two cars came tearing down the road with lights and sirens.

Guess what? The burglar wasn't deaf

(And I had explained the situation).

dl

The Zohan

+1

alcazar

iTrader: (2)

Happened to me. I was on a train, leaving Edinburgh, going south. As we accelerated away, the door next to the window seat I had, slammed open. It was held on a strap right across the next tracks

Me and a mate went to try and close it, but the air resistance wouldn't let us, and by that time we were up to about 80mph. Hanging out over the tracks trying to pull it shut was a bit scarey

I THOUGHT about pulling the communication cord, but worried about if it wasn't seen as an emergency, so I'd get a fine and my Mrs would go ballistic, so I ran back down the train and found the guard. He told me I could have pulled it.

My one chance and I blew it..........
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Leslie

They should be well and truly hammered for doing that.

Les