ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

This should by Vulcan logic be the easiest problem to answer. However, emotions get stuck in the way and its really eating away at me now on what is the "right" thing to do.

Whats happened is my mum has given me a watch for christmas ( A Raymond Weil Parsifal Chrono automatic). Its a hefty, heavy, gaudy thing thats more style over function (Roman numerals on a chrono, chunky polished case and huge sapphire winder that digs into the skin).

It really is not me (Sekonda man ). And here's the real guilt trip: I've since found it retails at £1650 Now I'm sorry, but nobody should ever buy a christmas present of that value. So that really put the s**t on the £20 microwaveable neck wrap with essential oils that I gave her. But thats just me with my bah-humbug ways. Ok, she will turn around and say I gave her my car, but that was a scraggy BMW 530 that I bought to knock about in after the Monaro, and she has since paid me back anyway.

Anyhoo back to the point: What to do:

Do the logical thing: Tell her straight and take it back? This WILL upset her. I did this before with a wrist chain she gave me; I'm not into bling. She seemed very put out by this....Little did I know it was my late grandad's. She never told me it was his, and still hasn't, I only found out after finding it in the safe some time later along with some old photos with him wearing it (it looked like new as it had been cleaned and polished at the jewelers).

Second option is to sell it or swap on the sly: She WILL notice (well, the question wil arise sooner or later), plus RWs (or any watch) has silly depreciation anyway - I may as well take it back to the shop.

Which kind of leaves me stuck on the final option: keep it, and just don't wear it. Knowing that she was thinking of me when she bought it....afterall, its the thought, not the object. And if need must, its there should I need it. Still, a waste of £1600, thats almost halfway to a S/C kit for my R32 ( ).

Some watch geeks might think I'm nuts here, but I'm just not convinced by the whole automatic/mechanical movement thing. I have an old war-torn Breitling Top-Time (weighs nothing compared to the Parsifal ) that although fairly reliable and pretty accurate (for a mechanical watch), is still a PITA. Running fast, running slow, don't wear it it needs winding, wear it everyday and then I bash it...which throws out the balance, then it needs servicing, regulating, adjusting. F**k it, I'll have a Quartz that won't lose or gain a second for over a month. And that leaves me with my Omega Seamaster multifunction as a posh dress watch - Slim, super accurate (quartz ), not OTT, and very different to the usual Omega fare.

I suppose I could sell the Omega and the Breitling and use the RW instead, but then I'd be replacing two light, understated watches for something that weighs more than both put together and sticks out more than J-Lo's ****.

Did I ever mention that I hate christmas?

scoobymad555

iTrader: (1)

sounds like you're screwed whichever option you go with to be honest

at least if you're honest n get it back to the shop then it's not a waste of close on 2k though.






failing that, i'm pretty sure i've got a couple of old casio's knocking around somewhere .... swapsies? - they're retro now ya know!!

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

Yeah, I'm screwed

I was hoping it would be faulty or break so I'd have a good reason to take it back, there is no way they'd stock two identical Parsifals so I could get a refund, and if they did have stock, I'd do my best to find something else on display that I prefer and then make hints of my preferences.

Which brings me onto an idea - how do you **** up a new watch without affecting the warranty so I can take it back as faulty (although the thought of doing such a thing is probably on the same lines to keying a brand new car).

Swapsies are out: I still have a Casio databank in the drawer..wore it right through school up until uni when the strap finally broke - never bothered fixing it, I bought another one instead


Casios rule!

LeeMac

iTrader: (1)

you sound like a tw*t

they got me this
I gave them a car


did you mention you were materialistic

I gave someone a house once, do you see me mentioning it

doh!!!!

whats the big deal, keep it, put it in a drawer

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

err, Okayyyy, just think of your own response before calling me the ****

Unless trying not to upset someone is now considering being a ****

She's the materialistic one, not me.

I wear Sekondas everyday. I don't feel the need to blow over grand on a watch. But on the very same thing, money is very important (without it we'd live in a cardboard box ), as such its such a waste to have £1.6K tied up in a object festering away in a drawer that will never be used, when it would serve a better purpose elsewhere.

Thats the cold logic, but on top of that emotionally, it will live in the drawer for setimentals, because I can't deal with upsetting someone again.

Dubzy

iTrader: (4)

Im sure in the long run your mum would want you to have something that u like so i would exchange it. U will both be happy in the end

GC8

Better not to do anything without telling her. Your choice is lump it or try to find out where it was from and establish whether theyl take it back (many jewellers will at this time of year). If so then youll have to negotiate.

gpssti4

iTrader: (6)

Of course you could tell her that it's not working correctly and that you had better return it yourself. And, as you've already said, they won't stock more than one, so you're free to choose another/refund. Is the little white lie option better though?

Jay m A

iTrader: (2)

Well at least this dilema will be for this Xmas only, considering you gave her a crappy £20 present, lol.

Perhaps to really stop this type of thing from happening next Xmas give her a crappy £10 present for her birthday

dpb

Open neck shirt, gold medallion,leather jacket, boots ,fake suntan and flares

go the whole pimp look Ali - its obvious yor mam has your number

MattW

The winner

TBH I think your mum has the best intentions at heart, however I'd exchange it for another watch you do like, a nice Omega Auto, or depending on RRP paid you may stretch to one of the Breitling Titanium Chronos (which is my next purchase me thinks ).

Then keep it if you wish, or wear it on special occasions. At some point in the future it may have more sentimental value than you now might think.

mr_D

iTrader: (12)

as they say honesty is the best policy. even if it dont seem like the right choice now. it will be in the long run.

think about it. in a few years time when she has never seen you wear that watch once. she will question you and you will probably have to lie. or you will wear it when yougo to see her but that will be lying as your making it out to be worn. when it aint.

you could how ever tell her that your not 100% with it. and she shouldnt of spent so much. to go back to the shop with you and choose something a bit less. at the end of the day its her your thinking about. and make her aware of that.

STi wanna Subaru

iTrader: (1)

Keep it till she dies then sell it and buy one you do like. Sorry but that's the best solution.

subaruturbo_18

It would probably depreciate more than a BMW drifted out of the showroom.

WRX_Dazza

Thats how it came across to me too

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

Thanks, I can appreciate that

Its looking to be that way and I have to bite the bullet. Its not going to be easy, as everything and anything I say to her always gets twisted to be negative and upsets her/puts her in a mood. I tread on eggshells at the best of times. Maybe the watch is a more of a sorry present (sorry for what though ), I don't know. A letter would have said a hell of a lot more.

I really don't want another automatic/mechanical watch to faff about with to be really honest. From a practicality point of view, what I really could do with is another everyday watch as the Sekonda is now looking a bit tatty (I give watches hell: I inadvertantly melted the strap off the last one ) and something semi-decent and heavy duty thats not high maintenance.

This might perplex the jeweller when I walk in asking to swap a £1.6K watch for a £50 Lorus.

(And probably upset my mum further, as she'll tie in the value with sentimental worth etc. - Eggshells, I just can't win ).

mr_D

iTrader: (12)

i know what you saying but at the end of the day choosing something a little less say around £1k and then tell her to use the rest to treat her self. after all its your mum. and your mum will forgive. i know what you mean and i too have never been ungrateful for what i have had. same as you. but sometimes its best to do the right thing. even if it seems wrong at the time.

you know what you have to do really. but the problem is you have too many option on what you could do

Trout

iTrader: (1)

Sell it on ebay and buy your mum a nice present with the money you get!

dpb

or a gift to yer Mam and the rest split between all your loyal subjects on scoobynet

- look at the service we're providing

DCI Gene Hunt

It's a present, you shouldn't put a price on it. Saying "£1600 could buy me..." is rather materialistic. Just remember that it's her present to you, your parents won't be around forever, and in years to come I'm sure you'll look back and regret selling it to get that chavy add on to a car.

Just my 2 pence.

mr_D

iTrader: (12)

who mentioned something chavy to add on to his car. we are on about getting a cheaper one and then doing something for his mum or giving the money back to her.

my 2 pence

Leslie

DCI is spot on.

Your mother must think a lot of you to buy you a present like that. She will be thinking that you must be thrilled with it.

If you have any regard for your mother's feelings, you have to let her think how delighted you are with it, and it would not hurt you to wear it at times when she can see you with it on.

If that is difficult to see-just reverse the positions and see how you would feel if your expensive present was effectively rejected.

Les

DCI Gene Hunt

How about accepting the gift for what it is instead of pinning a value to it?

ALi-B

iTrader: (1)

I didn't put a price on it at first. I know nothing of Raymond Weils and thought it was one of those like you can buy on an aircraft from an air hostess from the inflight shopping cart (thats the only place I've noticed them). So there was me thinking its probably a £300 watch. But then I noticed it was an automatic, not quartz, then noted the sapphires. And thought hmmm, better look this up before I put my foot in it. Googled it, saw the price and my jaw hit the desk.

And thats the point, my mum doesn't have £1600 to blow on gifts, I know that. Without giving the whole strory of reason as to why, I just do. The whole family has a mutual agreement on gifts (Christmas is not supposed to be about supporting the retail sector by blowing all your savings on buying gifts). I guess some people think £1600 can be thrown away without batting an eyelid, I wish I was that casual with money. Its the same reason why I DON'T have a S/C kit on my Golf. As much as I like cars, I simply can't justify the needless expense on a perfectly good car.

Especially at this point of my life where I'm trying to get rid of stuff, not accumulate it. And part of that is stuff inherited (lucky me cough the cynics - I'd do anything not to be trapped in my current/past situation). One trivial example is my Dad's old Jag is festering in a lockup, broken and leaking all over the place. I've lost count how many time I've said f**k it has got to go, its not worth much, I just want rid of the burden. Then I get a barrage of abuse from the family saying..."but its your dad's old car - the first and only car he ever bought brand new, you'll regret selling it". They are right: So there it remains in the garage, broken as I don't have time, the space, nor the finances to put it right (properly) and make it fully usable.

I still get lambasted for selling my grandad's old Scott, fact is the thing needed constant attention to keep it in order. I regret it being gone, but at the same time its a huge relief that its no longer a burden.

The watch will end up the same, stuck in a damp safe where it will seize from lack of use, it will tarnish, and before I know it I'll have another sentimental heirloom I can't get rid of. Unless it gets stolen or broken.

Actually on that thought, the watch has to go. I don't want the money. I don't want another watch. In fact I should sell what watches (of value) that I already have as well, as they sit there doing nothing for 364 days each year.

Thats the new year's resolution. I'll probably break it, but I can at least try.....I need to stop thinking about what other people think when I try and do something, its going to upset family and friends, but I can't keep on living like this. And that will include everything barring the immediate stuff I use is going. Sold or binned.

mr_D

iTrader: (12)

first dibs on anything free. lol.

some of us can see your reason mate and appreciate your looking out for your mum and not what you want.

good luck with your choice and have a good new years

Guest

iTrader: (2)

Sell it for £1600, buy a fake replica of the same watch at a car boot for £10, and keep the £1590 change either for yourself or to get her a nice present next christmas, depending on your consience.

Markus

Ali,
I'll fly over, break in and nick it from your place, then sell it on and we'll split the difference. I'll not trash the place too much, just enough to make it look good, job done!

StickyMicky

Chuck it into a safe and leave it alone for 10 or so years.

Herbie.

Looks like your mum specifically went out her way to pick you something special that she though you could remember her by when shes long gone. It would be a sad to get rid of it.
Just a shame you dont appreciate it.