FLAT ERIC

iTrader: (1)

The Arizona Highway Patrol came upon a pile of smouldering metal embedded into the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The wreckage resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it was a car. The type of car was unindentifiable at the scene. The lab finally figured out what it was and what had happened. It seems that a guy had somehow gotten hold of a JATO unit (Jet Assisted Take Off - actually a solid fuel rocket) that is used to give heavy military transport planes an extra "push" for taking off from short airfields. He had driven his Chevy Impala out into the desert and found a long straight stretch of road. Then he attached the Jato Unit to his car, jumped in, got up some speed and fired off the JATO! The facts as best as could be determined are that the operator of the 1967 Impala hit the JATO ignition at a distance of approximately 3.0 miles from the crash site. This was established by the prominent scorched and melted asphalt at that location. The JATO, if operating properly, would have reached maximum thrust within 5 seconds, causing the Chevy to reach speeds well in excess of 350mph and continuing at full power for an additional 20-25 seconds. The driver, and soon to be pilot, most likely would have experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners, causing him to become insignificant for the remainder of the event. However, the automobile remained on the straight highway for about 2.5 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied and completely melted the brakes, blowing the tyres and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface, then becoming airbourne for an additional 1.4 miles and impacting the cliff face at a height of 125 feet leaving a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock. Most of the driver's remains were not recoverable; however, small fragments of bone, teeth and hair were extracted from the crater and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.

Epilogue: It has been calculated that this moron nearly reached Mach 1, attaining a ground speed of approximately 420 mph!!!

I'm off down the Army Surplus to get my order in.
Group buy for JATO's anyone?

Mark

Not a double post but moved here from "General" by mods.Or is that M.O.D.'s

[Edited by FLAT ERIC - 2/20/2002 10:41:41 PM]

mbc

blimey!

Nimbus

Mach 1 is near 700mph, so someone has there calculations wrong. The car would disintigrate before it hit Mach 1.

Magic Boot

Wow i've never heard this one before!!! LOL

....... it's time to play the music, it's time to light the lights

kryten

this was a 1995 Darwin award entry

lots more to be found on the site