Friday larf.....
04 April 2008, 10:10 AM
#1
Scooby Senior
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: North Wales
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Friday larf.....
I know these ain't new, but I haven't seen them for a few years and they made me laugh.....
These are genuine clips from British Council tenants complaining to the
Council about problems with their flats.
1. My bush is really overgrown and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
3. It's the dog's mess that I find hard to swallow.
4. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6 a.m. I get woken up by his **** and it's now getting too much for me.
5. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat.
Would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.
6. Our neighbour's 18-year-old son is continually banging his ***** against my fence.
7. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.
8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
9. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
10. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path?
My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday.
Now she is pregnant.
11. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
12. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.
13. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.
14. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is
cleared.
15. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour & not fit to drink.
16. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my **** off.
17. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
18. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third. Please send someone round to do something about it.
19. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle, very badly, when he got his foot stuck in the hole in my back passage.
20. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind we had the other night that blew them off.
Geezer
These are genuine clips from British Council tenants complaining to the
Council about problems with their flats.
1. My bush is really overgrown and my back passage has fungus growing in it.
2. He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.
3. It's the dog's mess that I find hard to swallow.
4. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6 a.m. I get woken up by his **** and it's now getting too much for me.
5. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat.
Would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.
6. Our neighbour's 18-year-old son is continually banging his ***** against my fence.
7. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife.
8. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?
9. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.
10. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path?
My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday.
Now she is pregnant.
11. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
12. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50% are plain filthy.
13. I am still having problems with smoke in my new drawers.
14. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is
cleared.
15. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour & not fit to drink.
16. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my **** off.
17. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.
18. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third. Please send someone round to do something about it.
19. I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle, very badly, when he got his foot stuck in the hole in my back passage.
20. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind we had the other night that blew them off.
Geezer
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