Suresh

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We have a little boy who is entering his 'terrible twos' period bang on time.
Whenever he is asked to do anything that doesn't appeal, he just sits down quietly and refuses to move. Doesn't matter where he is at the time e.g. in the supermarket at the checkout or outside the creche just before getting in to the car. Instructing him to move in a stern voice usually works.

This evening he sat down on the landing and refused to begin his bathtime routine even when given the choice of this or a 'punishment'. I picked him up and carried him to the nearby stairs to the 2nd floor and put him on the first step and told him why I had put him there and he was not to move until I said so. This is the correct 'naughty step' procedure, I believe. After his 2 minutes were up I told him he could stand up and carry on with his bathtime and bedtime routine now. However he just continued sitting there and refused to move. My question is what to do if your child is naughty on the naughty step?

Really glad he's gone for the silent refusal approach rather than screaming tantrums though. Any experiences of the terrible twos out there that people might want to share?

Brun

I ignored your first sentence Your predicament seems damn funny to me
Why not try the widley un-known naughty rope method. This involves dangling the said child upside down from the ceiling above some sort of ugly reptile Let me know how you get on

Lee247

Ignore him.
He'll soon get fed up

little-ginge

Haven't got kids (yet). However, if you are going by the super nanny naughty step, there is a chat forum thing on here.. might be a good place to ask

http://www.supernanny.com/forum/

theboy

Ohh my god, the Scooby owners are getting old!!!! I only bought mine in the first place because my mini would not take a push chair and baby seat

Chip Sengravy

This 'naughty step' is a load of bollocks . 'Naughty cellar, or garage' coupled with 'naughty leave you in there with the lights off for a hour and all the spiders' would teach the little ****s a thing or two.

Lee247

You having memories Chip

Criss

Try said approach.

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

I got to sit on it last Saturday morning based on the state I was in Friday night, it would have been the dog house but even she wouldnt inflict the dog stink on me.

Nido

Too right. "Naughty step / room" etc not really going to teach them much, as there doesn't seem too much wrong with having to sit on a step for two minutes eh?

Chip Sengravy

It' all too contrived & mechanical..

kid is naughty..

kid gets sat on naughty stair..

parent retrieves kid whilst dispalying faux grief, and embelishes with some hugs....


and so on...

Kid gets mixed messages, and doesn't connect the 'punishment' with being naughty....

Kid then pushes the naughty limits...

parents apply the same mode of 'physcological' punishment...

Kid realises that being naughty isn't so bad after all....



Short sharp shock treatment, the shock & duration much less at an early age. 'Naughty stairs' sells programmes, real discipline won't

Jay m A

iTrader: (2)

Firstly, naughty cushion is good, they're portable

We usually go down the route of if they are refusing to do something then they're too tired, so its off to bed - then just pick him up and carry him to the bedroom, ours usually proves her lack of tiredness by doing whatever was required of her. We don't use this method regularly since nobody wants them to think that going to bed is something to be avoided, but its a good card to play if they're being naughty post dinner, like in your example.

OllyK

Watch "I smack and I'm proud", it may give a different perspective!

Jaydee5

Thank **** my kids are all grown up and I missed out on the "super nanny" crap

SyHightower

iTrader: (1)

we find it a fantastic method, everytime they speak/laugh/moan, 1 more min is added on, and at 5 and 3 years old, they soon know and learn quickly.

its more of a method to calm them down so you can reason with them, not really a punnishment.

Chip Sengravy

It does, it's like comparing mary poppins to the **** party in parenthood terms.

kids need somewhere inbetween, but at fear of repeatring myself, that doesn't sell programmes

I cannot belive people are actually doing & talking on the net about a 2 bob child discipline method they have seen on the ******* telly!!

CH4 of all channels

Jay m A

iTrader: (2)

I have never watched supernanny!

I hope you haven'y voiced your opinion based soley on what you have seen on the telly! CH4 of all channels

Suresh

Dunno. After I've told him to get up and carry on as usual and I then walk away when he doesn't listen - that could re-inforce his idea that ignoring his parents is okay, surely? Then again it would give me time to slip away and put a real-time post for advice here on SN!

Jaydee5

Some of us are so old we never had the "advantage" of telly to bring up and disciplin our kids




FYI I have 3 kids who went thought the sausage machine of childhood and teenage years to become exceptionally nice people Without the telly and new fangled books on "how to grow a perfect person"

Chip Sengravy

Give that woman a cigar!!

Spare the child, spoil the rod!!

Jay m A

iTrader: (2)

I wasn't talking to you - grandma

Jaydee5

Maybe you should

Suresh

We try a technique and if it doesn't work then we ditch it. There are many different resources for tried and tested techniques - books, tv and the internet being just three of them. Sorry for you that there wasn't the internet, television or books around to make life easier when you were raising yours.

stevem2k

Naughty step works in the majority of cases . Did he apologise after the 2mins ?

Silent treatment is just as valid to a toddler as the screaming fit. Both designed to provoke a reaction.

Steve

Jaydee5

I never found it was a problem. It was a job I took on ...the raising of children..a priviledge and a challenge I loved every minute of it and am rewarded with 3 quite exceptional children

I'm always sad to hear of parents who have such "problems" with their youngsters Whatever did you expect when you decided to give birth....an easy ride

Jay m A

iTrader: (2)

An easy ride is usually the cause, not the effect

stevem2k

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Jaydee5

I'm assuming the kids are a result of a decision not a random "easy ride" Not always the case, I know

Suresh

I think you misunderstand. Information sources and discussion forums are now available like never before. If you would honestly shun all such resources, shut yourself away and totally go it alone if you were raising kids today then good luck to you.

I posted primarily because I appreciated the irony of him being naughty on the naughty step and thought I'd share it. The rest of the time the only problem with him is his womanising!

With his little Swiss miss







Steve - It was my first attempt with the naughty step technique. I got him to get on with the end of day routine by himself but he didn't apologise as such.. I'll try that next time!

Bubba po

Philip Larkin - This Be The Verse


They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.