Gutmann pug

1. Dont let people talk you into organising it - £15 for two games of ten pin bowling, food, 2 free pints plus a bottle of wine per lane, bargain.

2. Dont hold the company kitty money. Everytime someone goes to the bar he has to come to you for the money and you feel compelled to get him to bring you back a beer / whiskey too

3. Dont let anyone bet you £5 to run down the bowling lane and slide headfirst into the pins trying to get them all in one go

4. Dont let the machine come down on the back of your head as it tries to clear the pins

5. Dont leave that establishment with the remains of the kitty money in your pocket and get leathered with your mates

6. Dont look down 3 hours later and realise you still have your bowling shoes on

7. Dont get up in the morning and by midday be back on the beer again

Happy days ........

Gary

Account deleted by request

That is a quality read

Sounds like you had a good night

chop

Jer

1. Don't take ten staff out for a Chinese buffet karaoke and get signed up by staff for the first song.

2. Don't intend to pay for the meal and first few drinks and then get to drunk to care already having given them a good Christmas bonus.

Don't get hit with a £600 bill with a 10% service charge for a buffet and drinks.

3. Don't wake up at 3 in the morning with the ****s and being sick due to food poisning.


Baa Humbug

Dream Weaver

Under no circumstances mix the following in a single glass:

Baileys - Sambuca - Vodka - Benedictine

Took me all of last week to get over that one

Big C

1) don't go mad at functions where the drink is free.... it inevitably costs you in some way.......

2) don;t fall for the charms of the office assistant, then drink so much that you sick in her mouth whilst playing tonsil tennis

3) Don;t fight in a locked underground car park with no CCTV with a guy who's had more to drink than you and thinks nothing of jumping on several cars bonnets and roofs to get to you, causing over £60k worth of damage which ends oyum up in the police station next day with the mother of all hangovers gained from 1)

4) don;t be sick on the bus the company has laid on at 1a.m. and get kicked off on the motorway

5) don;t fall in a river in icy conditions and have to walk 2 hours to get home (3steps forward , 2 back) - pneumonia will not be far away

LOL, the fun of the 'office party!'

C

The Zohan

You have had some top xmas parties!

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

I avoid them, my capability for making a **** of myself is legendary !

Robbie T

iTrader: (8)

1. Don't drink 4 pints and a glass of Bucks Fizz before you've had anything to eat.
2. Don't continue to drink red wine like its goin out of fashion on top of above for 5 more hours.
3. Don't think its a good idea to 'chat up' your colleagues wife because she looks hot, she will tell him what you said.
4. Don't joke around with the company gay bloke, he might think your intentions are more serious!!
5. Don't grab any bottle of 'wine' off the table, open and drink the contents. It may well be some poor sod's champagne he won in the raffle, and definitely dont threaten to knock him out because he thinks you're a **** for doing it.
6. Dont get back at 3 am and decide that a bird you know should 'have it' because you cant see straight and then proceed to go back a mates house with her miles from your own and pass out on the sofa.
7. Don't get a lift home the next day in a very noisy saff cosworth when your head feels like a bass drum skin and your guts like a washing machine on a spin cycle.

But i'm all better now

Big C

Lol - all of that was on the one night!!!

C

Floyd

iTrader: (9)

Hmmm, there's a post just like this somewhere else

F