Pavlo

Do you think we perceive more of each others emotions and thoughts that we commonly give credit for?

And if you do, what do you do about it?

Discuss.

Paul

NotoriousREV

Sometime you're just "tuned in" to certain people. Me and my wife are scarily "aware" of each other, but I'm also pretty in tune with some of my mates. I think sometimes you feel a connection with someone but you don't know why. Someone you've met in a previous life? Telepathy? Transferrence? Swamp gas reflecting off Uranus? Who knows...

Pavlo

Gas from Uranus is a common occurance....

"In tune" is a good phrase, the problem is, what happens when you're "in tune" with everyone you speak to? Is it that or do I just think everyone else is ignorant of their environment? I think many people would feel the same if only they stopped for a second.

Paul

NotoriousREV

I'd quite like to be in tune with everyone, but for me it works both ways: I meet people who I can't seem to "get", I don't dislike them but I don't gel with them because they seem closed off.

Maybe it's like being a receiver and your ariel is SWR'd in better?

Richard Askew

paul - you mean like a soul-mate type thing or folks we just click with?

SomeDude

Dang, what a strange subject.

Sartre on Scoobynet...

Paul & Rev, I'd have to be your nemesis on this thread.

I very very seldom to feel "in tune" with other people, and often gas is just that: from uranus.

If you really are in tune with everyone you talk to, you have a slight drug problem

Can you rephrase your question ?

Pavlo

Hmmm,

Not soul mates, or close friends, could be anyone. Don't need to talk, but do need to be around.

"you stink of fear" is pretty much where it's at.

Paul

Alan C

Are some people sub-consciously more observant?

Do they naturally notice the small expressions, movements, smell, voice inflection etc given of by those around them? If so, this is why you can tune into some people who are more relaxed and able to send out their own sub-conscious signals.

If people are nervous, uptight, PMT'd, anxious etc this hides those signals making the 'tuning in' more difficult if not impossible.

We all do this as a matter of course. Some people learn to heighten certain characteristics that enable them to interact better. The comic for example. Very popular, but (in many cases) ultimately false as this is not normally a 'natural' behaviour.

Interesting subject.. nice one.

Pavlo

Somedude,

One of the hardest things you can do, is to stop yourself and just listen to what someone has to say. I am often guilt of this, in phases, but I remember to bite my toung and listen regardless of whether I have something to say halfway through what the other person is saying.

But listening will get you a long way.

It's not my measured opinion of course, just what most young people suffer from.

Paul

Pavlo

Bingo.

Kieran_Burns

iTrader: (1)

I think someone once said that 90% of all communication is non-verbal.

In tune? Well... as has been said earlier, I would put that down to being more observant (whether consciously or not).

I had (have) a severe stammer (think Gareth Gates on a bad day), and had VERY major problems being able to communicate verbally (obviously!), so I 'learnt' to communicate more readily wih expressions, body tone... you know 'body language', and because of THAT I am more aware of what people are saying when they aren't actually saying it

I know I'm probably leaving myself wide open to abuse from the more 'low brow' 'round here.. but please.. no stammer jokes.. I find them quite offensive

Pavlo

I wouldn't worry about the stammering, but I would have to worry if you're another Gareth Gates!

Paul

philc

- a quick thread hi-jack; there's a chap who has just started at work who has a bad stammer.

What's the appropriate behaviour when he's speaking - listen patiently, finish his sentences, look the other way, engage eye contact, suggest alternative words ..... ???

Don't know the guy well enough to ask what is appropriate - or even if it is appropriate to ask what is appropriate.

Any guidance ?

bigsinky

is this something that can be learned or is it inbuilt inate instinct. my ex went throught training as a counsellor, then as a therapist, now teaches this stuff. she was pretty good at summing up people before her training, now she is lethal. sum you up and cut you down to size within moments of meeting you. Scary or what.

cheers

big sinky

Nimbus

philc,

I think you should finish his sentences for him... even better if you could finish them in a way to your favour, in an argument or discussion where he has a different opinion from you, for example. He'd love that....

bigsinky

@kieran

you say you have learned to be more observant of body language etc etc. have you had your stammer from you started to talk? if so, do you think your extra observing is something you have to conciously do or is it now a natural thing. i believe that a body makes up for certain "deficiencies", for want of a better word to put everyone on a level playing field. like blind ppls having a better sense of hearing etc. your stammer problem has given you an ability that many people would kill for. i know this doesn't help you and i know you would not rather stammer, but i find that being able to read body language, mood, non verbals can reveal so much about a person.

cheers

big sinky

Fulham71

sorry posted int he wrong place !