Muffleman

Hi all,

Must be something in the water cos we've now got a mini-me on the way ! As I steer helplessly towards the big 30, it seems like a reasonable age to have a kid, so what are the things I will be able to have and blame on the poor oik ? So far I've thought of...

1) Farleys Rusks ! Surely I'm not the only adult that likes these ?
2) Scalextrix obviously.
3) Going in early learning centre and toy shops...

what else ?????

JR55

Taking the little one for a walk without the missus = lots of ladies cooing over baby and you!!! I still can't work out why a bloke with a baby draws women like bees round honey.

Scooby96

Congrats matey, the best bit for me was pregnant sex - awesome

Back on topic:

Wetting the babies head on 15 consecutive nights with different mates - because you couldnt get them all out on the same night.

Thats all I could come up with - however it does come at a price:

NO SLEEP BEFORE AND AFTER THE BIRTH
POSSIBLY NO SEX FOR A WHILE (luckily for me it was quite the reverse!)
HER STRETCH MARKS
HER GOING ON AND ON ABOUT HER STRETCH MARKS
HER FARTING MORE THAN USUAL
HER PEEING MORE THAN USUAL
HER WEIRD HORMONAL IMBALANCES
HER BAD BACK
HER BAD BREATH

Basically mate its up to you TO DO EVERYTHING - I'm sure you'll love every minute of it.....unless you're squeemish??



[Edited by Scooby96 - 11/11/2003 3:20:45 PM]

Muffleman

Cheers Scoob96, the hormones thing has already started !

And altho I'm not squeemish, I'm DEFO staying at the head end come the big day

[Edited by Muffleman - 11/11/2003 3:25:42 PM]

DJ Dunk

iTrader: (5)

Nope, the bullets go straight through. Best to stick to kevlar based protection.

The Zohan

LMFAO @ Dunk although being a responsible parent i should just tut loudly and say 'that's not at all funny!'

Yep they are great cover for all sort of things including being able to park in parent and baby spaces, the ones with loadsa room so your paper thin scoob doors do not get dinted.

Great excuse to goto Toys 'r' us etc and browse all the great stuff.
Great excuse to buy all sorts of food stuff.


Downside
Lack of sleep
less money to spend selfishly
lot of logistical planning at stuff to lug around even on the simplest trip.
Sh*tty nappies

on balance still worth it

DJ Dunk

iTrader: (5)

Sorry Paul, not funny. But true

messiah

You're not the only one who like rusks!

An excellent excuse to rebuild my lego collection!

Dazza01

i actually prefered stickle bricks.....remember those ?? and one of the best bits is when there 18 they can take YOU to the pub on sunday's.

Scooby-Doo

Don't forget piles

Goochie

you could easily blame them for:

1) Lego
2) Farting

barge

like JR55 said, but get a puppy as well, you will also need a ****ty stick to beat them off

Muffleman

Hey Lego - cool ! I'd forgot about that.

I actually feel sorry for the missus in some ways, especially when she told me that her sense of smell could heighten during pregnancy ! Cos there's no chance I'm giving up Vindaloo, Beer and Mexican food !!!

Oh, and no - the baby won't be good cover for farting, I've kinda ruined any chance of that

GaryCat

Farleys Rusks have changed a great deal in 30 years, no salt and no sugar makes them taste like cardboard now.

magepaster

iTrader: (2)

Well that saves me popping to the shop to get some I hadn`t realised how much I missed them until reading this thread.

Scooby96

Gotta say I thought about not going down the head end but I certainly did - glad I did as it was amazing.

No-one be crude please as it was very special to me both times and hopefully a third soon!

JR55

The smell thing is spot on! my missus was a nightmare had to keep changing deodorant, aftershave and even the bloody shaving foam 'cos the smell was over powering. When looking for a pushchair get one with a tray near the handles, This tray or "Beer Holder" as it is now know at the rugby club holds up to 4 pints and has been invaluable during viewing the world cup on the big screen. Baby and beer safely housed by Mama's and Papa's....Nice

ChrisB

Nooooo, Farleys Rusks still rock. I have a box at home myself

You can get evil sugar free versions but the normal version is as good as ever in my book.

Muffleman

Phew ! I was getting a bit worried about the old rusks !

mart360

stickle bricks rock

lego is too small

go shopping with a little one by yourself, and look helpless...

never fails...

oh and you have to evaluate all the toys in woolies before you purchase!!!!

get down the action end.. its not that bad... and its well worth it

mart

TopBanana

Kids love playstations!

magepaster

iTrader: (2)

Yep, my new son who will be born mid February loves his PS2

civictyper

Congratulations. Kids are great.

Are kids good cover though ? They definately are if you're going on a long haul flight. Joined the back of a massive zig zag queue at Heathrow and was instantly usherd to the front thus skipping 100 or so people. Woo hoo !!

Kids are not so good for going out though as you get to realise just how child unfriendly the UK is for eating out. Not having notices in doors/windows and being shoo'd out of a restaurant for having children can really wind you up.

Dave P

-Going to watch the latest Disney Movie
-Watching kids TV on Saturday morning with the kids stating you are spending quality time with them
-Watching kids videos including Willow the Wisp, The Clangers, Grange Hill re runs and applying the same rule as for Saturday morning TV
-Pushing a shopping trolley along making car noises and screeching when you turn a corner.
-Farting, I always blame my 10 year old daughter

Dave