Whats your best excuses for sickies
20 June 2003, 09:58 AM
#1
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So far I've used
ear infection (genuine)
chest infection (had a bad cough anyway)
upset stomach (twice)
daughter broke arm - needed caring for (genuine)
Whats the best ones youve used, or whats the most outlandish that was actually true.
Weather is really nice, so need a few new ones.
LM
ear infection (genuine)
chest infection (had a bad cough anyway)
upset stomach (twice)
daughter broke arm - needed caring for (genuine)
Whats the best ones youve used, or whats the most outlandish that was actually true.
Weather is really nice, so need a few new ones.
LM
20 June 2003, 10:12 AM
#2
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Strained ligaments/muscles in my feet whilst playing a round of golf, was off work for five days on doctor's orders, no walking allowed, had to crawl round my house on hands and feet, very graceful.
20 June 2003, 10:42 AM
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Well my m8 has said on a few occasions his nan has died, last time he used it was about a month ago, the ****e also had time off 4 the funeral, the downside is u can only use it a few times, or change ur job regularly as he does and u can keep on using it, he's got through at least 5 nans since ive known him!
20 June 2003, 11:37 AM
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Help a fried move over the week-end (make sure everyone at work knows this by the Friday). Ring up on Monday morning- "cant come in for the next few days boss. Done my back in moving heavy objects over the week-end"
Use this one at least twice a year and it works everytime.
Use this one at least twice a year and it works everytime.
20 June 2003, 12:03 PM
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Got bit on the **** by a dog, and I cant sit down.
This was true, went in the next day and got sent home as I was kneeling on the floor coz I couldn't sit down
This was true, went in the next day and got sent home as I was kneeling on the floor coz I couldn't sit down
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20 June 2003, 12:34 PM
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Got bit on the **** by a dog, and I cant sit down.
This was true, went in the next day and got sent home as I was kneeling on the floor coz I couldn't sit down
This was true, went in the next day and got sent home as I was kneeling on the floor coz I couldn't sit down
20 June 2003, 12:42 PM
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just to add, i usually use the dodgey guts excuse, and always phone in yourself, dont get your spouse/partner to do it.
my mate here rang in work once, claiming to be sick, and you could hear a west country station announcer on a PA in the background, saying something like "The next train to Cornwall, my luverlies, is on platform three!"
luckily, it was me on the phone to him, and i suggested he had a nice time....(holiday)
he's sinced moved to cornwall..... funny that, he was going to an interview LOL.
BB
ps: everyone should have a couple of sickies per year
my mate here rang in work once, claiming to be sick, and you could hear a west country station announcer on a PA in the background, saying something like "The next train to Cornwall, my luverlies, is on platform three!"
luckily, it was me on the phone to him, and i suggested he had a nice time....(holiday)
he's sinced moved to cornwall..... funny that, he was going to an interview LOL.
BB
ps: everyone should have a couple of sickies per year
20 June 2003, 12:43 PM
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Stupid cow told her I didnt want a drink
Nah it was a real dog, just walked past him and bang sunk his teeth in my rump.
Nah it was a real dog, just walked past him and bang sunk his teeth in my rump.
20 June 2003, 12:45 PM
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Two things its easy to swing are bad nerves or depression, and a bad back.
When I was pee'd off with work last year I had 8 weeks off with a dislocated sacroiliac. I did have the injury years before so I knew the symptoms. I had my doctor running in circles and issuing sick note willie nillie. I have about 1000 hard core pain killers in my bedroom cupboard if anyone is in need
When I was pee'd off with work last year I had 8 weeks off with a dislocated sacroiliac. I did have the injury years before so I knew the symptoms. I had my doctor running in circles and issuing sick note willie nillie. I have about 1000 hard core pain killers in my bedroom cupboard if anyone is in need
20 June 2003, 12:50 PM
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ps: everyone should have a couple of sickies per year
I bet a nice yearly bonus would create a much healthier workforce 
[Edited by GU5 - 20/06/2003 12:51:46]
20 June 2003, 12:59 PM
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Similar to Mark. In 16 years i've had i think 5 days total.
Personally i enjoy my job, so never feel the need to pull sickies, added to the fact that i can't make money sat at home or whatever!
Personally i enjoy my job, so never feel the need to pull sickies, added to the fact that i can't make money sat at home or whatever!
20 June 2003, 01:07 PM
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Personally i enjoy my job, so never feel the need to pull sickies, added to the fact that i can't make money sat at home or whatever!
20 June 2003, 01:11 PM
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Not unless it was in his nec(k) BB..!!
What i would say though, is that i'd never go to work if i was *really* suffering. Touch wood, i've always been successful at shaking off on-coming colds, so they rarely trouble me. But going to work and spreading germs is a no-no; i hate it when people come in when they know they shouldn't.
What i would say though, is that i'd never go to work if i was *really* suffering. Touch wood, i've always been successful at shaking off on-coming colds, so they rarely trouble me. But going to work and spreading germs is a no-no; i hate it when people come in when they know they shouldn't.
20 June 2003, 01:53 PM
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no one will beat this. Had a call from one of the guys who wait for it,,,,shagged his bird only to find his f/s won't retract back and had to have an emergency circumcision
he's not in today obviously
he's not in today obviously
20 June 2003, 01:56 PM
#23
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Funnily enough, I had to take 3 days off work coz I got bad sunburn on my ears (of all places) - I kid you not.
I ended up with lots of fluid in them and look like I had huge cauliflower ears for a few days. Had to wear a bandage over my head with some antisceptic cream smeared all over them.
Felt like a right tw@t.
Stefan
I ended up with lots of fluid in them and look like I had huge cauliflower ears for a few days. Had to wear a bandage over my head with some antisceptic cream smeared all over them.
Felt like a right tw@t.
Stefan
20 June 2003, 02:05 PM
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I've been snowed under today and yesterday as been having to get stuck into the work that the guy with the tight foreskin should have been doing
He was in a bad way so all sins forgiven and all that
He was in a bad way so all sins forgiven and all that
25 June 2003, 12:03 AM
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One of my former colleagues had a guy phone in saying his mother had been taken ill, which would have been a perfectly valid excuse, had he not previously taken genuine leave for his mothers funeral some 5 years earlier, doh!
25 June 2003, 12:08 AM
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My girlfriend was phoning around staff of the coffee shop she supervises, trying to get someone to cover for someone that had sprained their ankle. Upon phoning the one lad, she was told that he was off for a meal as it was his dad's birthday.
His dad must be royalty, as he had a birthday and birthday meal in April too
Andy
His dad must be royalty, as he had a birthday and birthday meal in April too
Andy
25 June 2003, 12:12 AM
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as an additional thought, who else actually feels guilty when they are genuinely off sick? Like others on this thread, I have taken maybe 5 days off sick in the last 7 years, yet when I am genuinely ill I feel guilty about not going in. Last time I was projectiling out of both ends and had a fever in the hundreds, yet about an hour after making the call found myself thinking "perhaps I'm not that bad afterall"...
then there are the other people that take their full "sickness allowance" every year as they believe it is the same as holiday entitlement!
then there are the other people that take their full "sickness allowance" every year as they believe it is the same as holiday entitlement!