Dave P

There is a mail doing the rounds of a conversation between a computer help desk support guy and a user in a remote site.

Bottom line is the users PC has stopped working and after some tim eit become apparant that the reason it doesn't work is that there is a power cut. Help desk guy suggests that the user put the pc back in the box, take it back to the shop and say that the shop shouldn't have sold an idiot like him a pc.

Anyone have the full text?

Dave

Mice_Elf

Oh blimey..how old is this??

Go to The Things They Say...in fact...hold on...Here you go

Mice_Elf

Or...to be even lazier.... This has changed from WordPerfect to HP over the years...


Actual dialog of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee:
- "Ridge Hall computer assistant may I help you?"
- "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
- "What sort of trouble?"
- "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
- "Went away?"
- "They disappeared."
- "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
- "Nothing."
- "Nothing?"
- "It's blank it won't accept anything when I type."
- "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
- "How do I tell?"
- "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"
- "What's a sea-prompt?"
- "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
- "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
- "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
- "What's a monitor?"
- "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
- "I don't know."
- "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
- ".....Yes, I think so."
- "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall"
- "......Yes, it is."
- "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
- "No."
- "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
- "Okay, here it is."
- "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
- "I can't reach."
- "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
- "No."
- "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
- "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
- "Dark?"
- "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
- "Well, turn on the office light then."
- "I can't."
- "No? Why not?"
- "Because there's a power cut."
- "A power... A power cut? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in ?"
- "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
- "Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
- "Really? Is it that bad?"
- "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
- "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
- "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."

Dave P

CHEERS GUYS

Mice_Elf

I'll take that as meant for me...even though I am singular, not plural, even on my most schizophrenic of days and I'm female, too...

NAF

Picky !

Jer

Jason the exact same thing happend to me. LOL

fast bloke

in my vast experience as a techie I have only ever had one monitor blow up...... just after the owner spilled his coffee down the vents on the top. I thought it was a strange place to keep coffee, but he explained it completely reasonably that it helped keep it warmer for longer

Anything to confess Jason?

Mice_Elf

Once had one muppet ring me up complaining that his kybd wasn't working...after some investigation and pertinant questions, it transpired that he had taken it home, taken it apart and soaked it in the bath overnight to attempt to clean it...

You could squish the water out from between the membranes...