Well done to Aiden! I was also another victim of bullying whilst in my first year at secondary school (12/13). It soon stopped when I gave the "leader" a swift right hook followed by a kick to the plums!
Yes I got punished by the school for my actions and even threatend with expulsion. But that soon died a death when my father asked the head what he'd done previously to resolve the bullying issue. When the head couldn't give him an example of any action taken my old man got up, pulled me up out the seat and walked out the head's office and nothing more was said.

 

That's the problem with schools, they can't/don't take action against bullies. Maybe their hands are somewhat tied in terms of punishment and political correctness, but the lack of recognition and affirmative action in an attempt to stem it is my biggest gripe. They don't even acknowledge its a problem and want to tie you up in bureaucracy to prevent escalation!

At least you managed to correct the problem, as did Aiden, but unfortunately, there are many others out that that won't take action themselves, and will suffer at the hands of bullies their whole life!

 

Even if the school did 'deal with it', I bet your son would never have felt as good about it as he does right now. A good lesson about making things happen for yourself, rather than being at the mercy of those above.

 

Hell yeah.

 

I smiled with great pleasure when I read that. Well done Aiden. He won't get bothered again I imagine.

Les

 

Thanks Les, I hope not. When he told me about it I was so chuffed that he finally stood up for himself!

Needless to say, that a brief conversation along the lines of "you only hit defence" followed, but still the change in his attitude was fantastic, he was much happier all evening. Not seen him like that in ages!

 

As someone who was bullied daily throughout primary school and the first bit of high school, he deserves all the praise for standing up for himself, it was something I was never strong enough to do, so very well done Aiden!

One of the best ways to get rid of a bully that I was told about came from someone I used to work with. Someone he knew had a son that was being bullied daily to the point where his son didn't want to go to school. This bloke is an ex bouncer and owns a company that supplies doormen to various clubs etc. When he got his son to eventually tell him what was going on, he spoke to the school and also somehow got the address of the kid that was bullying his son so that he could speak to the parents about what was happening...

When he went round their house, the dad answered the door and BAM, he was met by a full on punch by the bouncer dad, knocking him clean out! Followed up with a message to the bullies mother that if their son goes near his son again he'd come back and do it again and keep coming back until it stopped. Would you believe, it stopped immediately!

I've actually met this bouncer guy and although quite laid back, he can be quite intense when aggravated so I'd hate to be on his bad side!

 

Thanks mate.

Aiden got a fair bit of praise from me for it, simply because it's so difficult to stand up in the face of adversity. Needless to say he's now learnt how deal with bullies in the future.

 

My lad just turns 6 tomorrow and has be at Taekwondo for 2 yrs now, he goes to a class at Arnold hill school campus which is very good for the kids, fun based learning, and they do gradings every couple of month, the first are based on things like 999 emergency, first aid, balance, with some basic punching and kicking moves, he has progressed reasonably well and the teachers are very experienced with dealing with young kids.

My boy is a tad bigger than average and a bit of a sensitive soul too, but has a bit of a temper when pushed, a bit like his old man, so I thought it best to get him in early as it did me the world of good, both for discipline and self defence, I started at 7yrs old and if I'd have started earlier it would of saved me a few years of stick.

Not sure what area of notts your in but it's worth the travel for the right club, send me a pm and i'll get the number for you so you can have a chat it you like.

 

Thanks Ditchmyster. PM on its way!

 

Well done OP

 

Another vote for martial arts for an earlier age for kids

 

Getting kids involved in Rugby ain't a bad idea either. Your kids will make some good friends, some maybe for life, and a set of team mates tend to stick up for each other. You mess with one, you mess with them all.

 

Currently under investigation!

Would love to do this, sadly rugby isn't pushed toward kids the same way as football is... (Of which in not a fan! Lo)

 

Give Ilja Hoffman a call. His number is on his website http://www.mars-nottingham.com/ I'm dire he used to do a children's class of jujitsu or self defence.

He's a really nice guy and really talented. He trains in various disciplines himself.

 

It's a difficult one actually.

My 6 year son sometimes tells me some of the other boys have been 'physical' with him, ie pushing, jostling, tripping up etc. As well as being one of the biggest in his class he has been doing thai kick boxing for over a year. And if I may say so is a natural at martial arts and amazes me with his technique, speed and power (for his tender years of course)

However I never quite know what to say when he tells me about the other boys being inappropriate. My inner knee jerk response is to tell him to use what he had learned and 'jab, jab, cross, jab, cross, uppercut, hook and knee to the groin'

But I don't want him to grow up thinking this is how you react to stressful situations and I bite my lip and tell him to rise above it.

It's difficult to know when to tell a small child it's ok to use a physical violent response. I haven't figured it out yet.

 

What about taking a young child to boxing? Martial arts seems to get mentioned a lot, but not boxing? Just curious really.

I'm not a parent yet, but I would defiantly consider taking him/her to some sort of boxing/martial arts class from a young age.

 

Thanks matey. I'll take a look!

I think the time comes when the child is too afraid to go to school. That was certainly my trigger point.
Aiden withdrew, took his anger out on his younger brother, ignored his mum's instructions, was under performing at school (very very unlike him) and just wasn't himself. At this point it was determined that this was more than playground shenanigans. After he tackled the bully, he's back to his bright, helpful studious self.

He's an intelligent kid, and his moral compass was telling him not to fight for fear of repercussions, and I actually had to explain to him that any trouble he got into for it at school would be taken on by myself; effectively absolving him. This was on the proviso that it was in self defence only.

I think boxing has a stigma attached that keeps it from popularity. Especially as you don't see many cartoon superhero boxers! Lol

It wasn't particularly pushed at under 14's when I was younger, whether that's changed now, I don't know. I kick-boxed at secondary school (I was taller than those my age back then... I stopped growing at 15 though! Lol) but there was no where that touch outright boxing.

 

Same here, Ding.

I'm still disheartened to know that a lot of schools don't do much to stop bullying. OK, sometimes the victim is actually a bully himself/herself; sometimes the bully is getting special attention like a victim (of his/her own demons) with the MDT investing all its energy to work out the child; sometimes a child is violent or gives in to violence because child's home life is troubled etc. etc. None of these cases justify bullying. Education providers should be doing everything to stop it. Often simply the child's family life is blamed if his/her behaviour is submissive or aggressive or otherwise abnormal. It's not always the case. The problems can be in his/her school itself, and schools should be able to spot them and deal with them. There has been so much campaigning against bullying in schools in last few years, but it really is very sad to hear that the children like OP's are still getting bullied to the point that they don't want to go to school.

 

Firstly well done to Aiden and his Dad for supporting him. He will remember that punch for the rest of his life..... I know because I can still remember punching Kevin Adams (if you're out there you so deserved it) after being bullied every day for about 5 weeks when I moved to a new school aged 12.

Despite my mother telling me to turn the other cheek (and the school being utterly disinterested in me and many others being bullied by said lad and his entourage even thought they were fully aware of it) I eventually snapped and hit him so hard on the nose that my hand hurt for a week..... his nose was a right mess and he was out cold.

I was never bothered by him or his gang again. Like others on this thread I don't condone violence, but in the absence of anything else it is all these kids understand.... the schools have a lot to answer for as bullied children can carry that for the rest of their lives and it can still affect them long into their adult life!

In my opinion Frenchwood you and your lad have done the right thing. Fair play to the both of you!

 

It is a shame that this is how it really is. The education system in this country is poor in comparison to other well developed countries, and I cannot see how it is going to get any better.

Thanks, you are right. Sometimes it really is the only answer. I spent many an hour on the phone to various parties trying to sort out the bullying at the last school Aiden was at. It's frustrating and upsetting to know that your child is going through that kind of torment, especially when you yourself are powerless. Not only was this Aiden's last resort, it was also mine!

At least I can now sleep easy in so much as I know he's capable of dealing with bullies himself should he ever need to!