I did think about writing something myself but i dont think i would be able to keep myself together, where as my aunty is a school teacher and is quite strict and has said that anyone saying anything she doesnt want them to make a fool out of themselves by crying which will be hard but im sure that i could do it for my nan. I still cant believe she's gone

 

I hide myself within my flower,

That wearing on your breast,
You, unsuspecting, wear me too --
And angels know the rest.

I hide myself within my flower,
That, fading from your vase,
You, unsuspecting, feel for me
Almost a loneliness.



- Emily Dickinson


From: Poems by Emily Dickinson Series One
Edited by two of her friends
Mabel Loomis Todd and T.W. Higginson

 

Dont want to take this off topic at all. But as Sara has raised the question.
I dont think this needs to be a sticky post, its a post that will never die ..... Its a place to come and take away some of lifes pressures, getting things off your chest.

I truley belive this post will never fall !



Thinking of you all at this time xx


WISH

 

my prayers ....

sorry I'm no good with words ....

 

I'm so sorry Steph

 

sorry to hear your sad news steph

 

Steph

Sorry to hear of your loss - as well as others who have posted about their losses too.

I hope you all find the strength you need in these sad days

 

just caught up with this thread (once again)... Steph.. hugs to you... Sarah .. two sugars please hun... glad that christmas was 'ok' on the whole for everyone..theres a lot to be said about this thread.. it truly IS a 'rollercoaster' of a ride in here... Ive sat and read through again as I said, had a 'bolt' hit me in so much of the fact that my Bro in Law is obviously playing out time as it were.. but Ive now got this thought that I will, possibly, be asked to be one of the 'bearers' on the day of the funeral.. wierd thing is, that I did this exact same thing just over 20 years ago... FOR HIS SON!!
(lad got run over ).. that really IS a 'numbing' thought...


Sara, better make that a LARGE coffee...

 

i will put the coffee on

is your bro in law at home still? i hope you do have more time with him but as you know with Duncans mum, she was going great guns then ran out of steam. i hope you can still have some good times

 

Home was the best place for my mum - but the hospice had a bed on standby at all times should we need to take her in. In the end this was not needed and we are glad as she didnt want to go in. We all took it in turns to go and look after her and spend time with her. This was great in some ways and we felt as if we were paying back the years of her looking after us, but not very nice in other ways as we saw the gradual decline.

Time does go too quickly though but thankfully we all treated every visit as special and as if it would be the last time we saw her - so nothing was left unsaid feelings wise... this meant we all could have no regrets as to something we should have said. In the end her consciousness was a prohibitive factor in conversation and we are glad that we told her how special she was to us when she could still communicate back to us. I am sure she could still understand us all at the end even though hardly conscious.

John, that really is a numbing thought - my thoughts are with you and your brother in law. I hope that he feels at peace knowing that everyone is there for him.

 

Sorry to hear of your loss Steph, it will take time to get over it.

Well said Wish.

Les

 

yes, Sara.. 'did' the hospital thing ... they can do no more so home it is... he's been 'enjoying the Festivities' as much as he can , in the knowledge its gonna be his last ...

 

thanks for all the kind words everyone ive just found the the perfect poem for her funeral its called when tomorrow starts without me.

When tomorrow starts without me and I am not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes are filled with tears for me,
I wish so much you wouldn’t cry, the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things we didn’t get to say.

I know how much you loved me, as much as I loved you,
And each time you think of me I know you’ll miss me too,
But, when tomorrow starts without me, please try to understand ,
That angel came and called my name and took me by the hand.

When tomorrow starts without me, don’t think we’re far apart ,
For every time you think of me, i’m right there in your heart.

 

Beautiful.

Thoughts with you all.

Pete

 

thats perfect steph

i was asked if i wanted to read anything out but i couldnt have done it

 

i didnt get the chance at my grandads funeral so this is for the both of them im just hoping i can do it without crying as my aunt is very strict and said she wants no tears
when i go to florida in september im getting a tattoo of two robin red breasts as since my grandad died theres one that visits our garden every day and when my mum came from the hospital after my nan had died there was a robin sat in a tree near our car so i guess its my grandad and nan looking out for us

 

If you want to cry then you have a good cry - don't let others tell you how you should grieve !

Good Luck.

 

Absolutely. We all howled at my mum's.

 

Gave me goose bumps - what a lovely poem

Not really fair your auntie tellilng you not to cry, it's hard not to at times like this, if you need to, let it out, I was in tears at the funerals of my grandparents I couldn't help it, I tried not to get upset because my mum was in pieces, bt seeing her so upset broke my heart as much as losing my grandparents, so I couldn't keep it back.

Everyone grieves in different ways.

Hope all goes well *hug*

 

we all express our greif in different ways , I suppose.. im the sort that tries to be the 'rock' for everyone else.. when my Sis in Law passed away I held it together on the day of the funeral to be 'there ' for others.. I was *screaming* on the inside.....few days later, driving along near home.. 'one' of her songs came on the radio... I had to pull over floods of tears, blubbering like a baby... let it out, it needs to..

 

Absolutely Hectic.

Steph that is a truly beautiful poem.

Les

 

my mum made me read it out to her before and it made her cry i will end up having the whole church in tears at this rate! im staying strong for my mum and my step sister and her fiancee want to pay their respects and show their support too which is good as when we was younger we wasn't that close but these last few months we've grown closer we're more like proper sisters now

 

Just caught up with this thread as I haven't been on-line since before Christmas.

Happy New Year to you all, those on this thread and those who are no longer with us.

I don't think this thread needs to stay 'sticky', as it seems to be almost that as it is, and quite rightly so.


I'm a bit watery eyed after reading Steph's poem, its beautiful, and if you want to cry, I say cry, its natural, normal, and won't do you any good keeping it in.

Hugs to you all.

 

Thanks for the lovely comments everyone has made, i can do it without crying but it makes everyone fill up or cry when they hear it so i guess its the right one. i miss my nan so much already i cant believe i'll never see her again she had a good life she was 84 but she will be sadly missed by all of us there was 7 kids and 11 grandkids and 1 great grandchild too so its quite a big family we have i just hope the funeral runs smooth now

 

Had phone call.. Bro In Law was taken into Hospice last night .. deteriorating rapidly apparently.. asking about his son ( see previous posts) and me, too....missus has just phoned me .. looks like we soon on way up to pay a visit....

 

John - it sounds like you should be there as soon as. Thoughts are with you and your family.

 

thats the sort of calls you dread, hope you can get through this John, will be thinking of you today...

as you know things can go downhill very quickly, we got a call to say my mum had passed away, feel very cheated,angry, upset that i wasnt with her

 

Thanks,
just waiting now on missus getting home.. then finding out where place is.. shrewsbury way somewhere, sods law im off work today as i have a very sore back, my missus's first question was will you be ok to take me??
kinda puts my bad/sore back into perspective really when you think of the 'gravity' of the journey ahead...

 

good luck

you know we will all be here later if you need us

 

Thanks, Sara,
kinda hope he does go quickly now, so as not to suffer any more than he has to... sat here very much in 'limbo' as it were. Isnt it such a wierd feeling ...knowing the inevitable is so close ,yet being nothing more than a 'pasenger' in a sense....