Seth
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Seth Johnson, the Leeds Utd footballer and star of ITV’s Emmerdale, has admitted driving his Porsche 911 at 135 mph whilst drunk. Although this will merely enhance his prospects as a footballer, it could spell an end to his TV career.
In Emmerdale, as in real life, Seth plays a dim-witted slob. His on/off romance with Audrey Roberts has become one of the enduring bores of the past thirty years, but perhaps the scriptwriters have found a way of writing him off the show once and for all.
A spokesman from Derby County Nil, one of Seth’s former clubs, said, “for someone who couldn’t hit a cow’s **** with a banjo, it’s difficult to accept that a no-talent halfwit thug should earn the kind of money the rest of us just dream of” (actually, I said that).
Seth (75), along with most players, expects to sign for Chelsea within the next few hours.
In Emmerdale, as in real life, Seth plays a dim-witted slob. His on/off romance with Audrey Roberts has become one of the enduring bores of the past thirty years, but perhaps the scriptwriters have found a way of writing him off the show once and for all.
A spokesman from Derby County Nil, one of Seth’s former clubs, said, “for someone who couldn’t hit a cow’s **** with a banjo, it’s difficult to accept that a no-talent halfwit thug should earn the kind of money the rest of us just dream of” (actually, I said that).
Seth (75), along with most players, expects to sign for Chelsea within the next few hours.
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His on/off romance with Audrey Roberts
Mind, 135 whilst p!ssed; jail term maybe for Seth The Younger? Oooh er - don't drop the soap in the showers...
