Trying to create a handy guide for my dash board, because I'm getting forgetful...

So there's:

Using excessive speed.
Not idling for 1 min after hard driving.
Forgetting to service.
Handbrake turns.
Backwards baseball cap, Puffa, shades etc

Anything else?


Rich

 

Failure to Wave

 

yeh a couple to add:
don't get lazy after a late visit and think "I'll park the car on the drive just this one time, cos I can't be bothered to open the garage", otherwise the "puffa jacket crew" will pay you a visit.

&
don't
play dance music at full blast when the lights are on red when two 16 year olds walk past, escpecially when your in your mid 30's & going grey.

Nick

 

Don't attempt to Race a Koni Equipped Cavalier SRi....


Don't want to get your **** whooped now do you?


Scott!

 

Don't forget that your lights are on the left when flashing someone - otherwise, temporary blindness will ensue from the windscreen washer being activated!!

 

If it has been foggy, don't forget to turn your foglights off!

 

Here are a couple more for the list:

This is *my* car, not a company 406/Mondeo/Vectra (delete as applicable)

My car *is* faster than that diesel van in the midrange. I know it is.

I don't need to race BMW 318s, it's just that they need to be shown sometimes.

Police cars in the rear view mirror may be closer than they appear.

Words to live by, ladies and Germans.

[This message has been edited by Rider (edited 09 October 2000).]

 

Get caught

Write it off

Drive it slowly

Sell it

David

 

Things not to do

Leave it unlocked with the engine running
Let it run out of fuel.
Fit neon lights around the steering wheel.
Paint it pink and pretend to be lady penelope
Forget the car does have limits
lift out when going round a corner at speed(unless you want to that is)

 

What's wrong with the neon lights? I don't agree with them around the steering wheel. I have a blue neon panasonic headunit, and have been thinking about a blue neon light to blend it -(when its dark)- in as it sticks out as a sore thumb (looks very cool though)

[This message has been edited by Hos (edited 10 October 2000).]

 

Don't drive it hard until it's FULLY warmed up.

Remember to let it cool down before stopping.

Add lots of security.

Always be able to stop within the distance you can see to be clear.

Don't speed in 30 zones.

Don't get carried away on the straight and regret it when you enter the next bend.

Forgive other mere moral road users for not having the slightest notion of how much they are holding you up.

Enjoy it, because after all "I'm worth it"

Jamie

 

Don't, when entering the northbound sliproad of junction 4a on the M3, allow the BMW M3 to attempt to overtake you because he's been aggressively up your **** for the last three hundred yards and you've just come out of a long meeting and really can't be bothered to prove to him that your car is faster so he scrapes past cos its really too narrow and too tight on that slip road to overtake and as he then discovers, too tight to get round that corner at that speed so he spins straight in front of you and you hit both him and the concrete bridge support. Oh, and resist the temptation to hit him when, after twatting your car up good and proper, he says "my cars only got 2 wheel drive unlike yours". Instead, actually race him, accelerate away from him and then when he spins it'll be behind you and you can laugh in safety whilst viewing the whole thing in your rear view mirror.

Cos the former train of events is what happened to me last week, and let me tell you all now, a Nissan Micra courtesy car is really no substitute...

BMW... the ultimate w**kers machine.

 

Bloody hell Andy K!

Bad luck! - hope Beemer driver has admitted full liability etc

Is yours a write off?

Rich

 

Whatever you do, don't blow up the engine unless you've got warantee or deep pockets.

NeilR

 

remember that when in traffic and a fellow scoob driver creeps toward you from the opposite direction that instead of continuing a conversation with them, brake coz there *is* still traffic infront of you and it still makes a dent if you're only doing 3 mph.

 

Don't try to prove that your car is quicker from the lights if you haven't checked for coppers.

I decided to gun it from the lights and only found out that the car I raced was a copper when he switched his blue lights on and booked me for speeding!!!!

Oh Dear.

 

Andy K

 

Andy K

Man thats harsh... You work for Nokia or Sun then? I had an 'inccident' with an BMW M3, what is it with those guys, do BMW have a check list you have answer before purchasing such a car and sign...

1. How many metres will it take to break from 70 to 0 mph..

a) 1 metre, use car infront to slow me down
b) stop?

c) me no understand

2 When conditions are bad ie. fog, rain, ice etc... do you:

a) take notice of this, and slow down leaving an appropriate distance between u and the car infront...

b) speed up, tail gate the car infront and flash your lights as often as possible, along with some hand jestures..

3) When driving a M3, are you :

a) the only car that has the right to be on the road

b) invincible

c) armour plated, so have the ability to side swipe other cars out of the way...

..etc...

I .......... confirm that the above information represents my complete lack of consideration for other drivers, and therefore I am qualified to own a M3.

 

Adelasalle

No, work for myself - design, project management and production of company exhibition stands and conferences.

Mr Ultimate Wa*ker didn't apologise didn't accept responsibility and I didn't push it because a. too pissed off b. couldn't see the point and c. v.shaken! and d. v.v.v. pissed off.

Car not a right off but I don't know the score as far as No Claims bonuses and stuff in the future. Even if you have a claim but its not your fault does that count as a claim or not? Insurance cos only ever ask if you've had an accident, not whose fault it was. How is it likely to affect future premiums - anyone know? Currently with NFU insurance. I'd be grateful of an answer if anyone has one.

Anyone who knows that junction well (4a M3 northbound) could you confirm that it is too narrow to overtake near the roundabout end because I was fairly shaken by events and could only remember it vaguely. As I recollect he forced past and I had to pull over the left hand white line with him over the right hand one for him to get by. As I live in sunny Cheshire and don't fancy the drive to Farnborough in a Micra I'd be very grateful if someone who knows the area can confirm my recollections.

Thanks!

Andy K

PS My courtesy Nissan Micra actually overtook a cavalier with Konis on it the other day, or was I mistaken... or was it parked?




[This message has been edited by Andy K (edited 10 October 2000).]

 

Andy K,

I hope your insurance company are taking his to court over this, as long as they prove its his fault you'll be OK...

Me, I have 0% no claims at mow, 26 yrs old and a write off in the last year, my insurance is in excess of £3K.. so i'd push for proving it was the other guys fault if I were you.

Hope you get a good result,

Alex

 

If you can prove that he was at fault, and his insurance pay up, your no claims will not be affected. Earlier this year I t-boned a C-reg Fiat Uno who pulled out of a side road to turn right without looking. Impact speed only c.10mph, but +£2k damage done - her insurance paid without question, and my NCB is thankfully intact.
Have you got some sort of legal cover with your current insurance?
Hopefully you will have some luck, but not sure where you stand if you crash into somebody who has lost it in front of you....

 

Andy K,

Sorry to hear your bad news. I'm also with the NFU and they will NOT deduct your NCD if the accident is proven not to be your fault. However, the next big question is: Were there any witnesses? If it's just your word against his it could get tricky.

Jamie

 

Andy,
did the police attend the accident???
If they did and think that his driving was dangerous for the conditions then they will probably do him.
Ive had it before where some woman in her big merc decided she wanted to turn left towards heathrow airport off the roundabout, me being in the middle lane and indicating to go right (works van) carried on, she being in the right hand lane and not looking where she was going because she drove a german car just went left...
good job the van has suspension by lotus!!!!

 

Andy K,

I know junction 4a very well. It is too narrow to overtake. It is also a single lane and a very sharp bend. The M3 driver was indeed a complete tw*t. I would recommend reporting it to the Police. He is guilty of at least careless driving, if not dangerous driving. Effing BMW drivers.

I had an M3 right up my **** in a 30 limit a couple of weeks ago. Obviously wanted a race - in a 30. When I turned left he went bombing off down the road. Bet the speed traps weren't around that day though.

Jerome.