A Scotsman and his ever nagging wife were on holiday in Jerusalem when his wife suddenly died. The undertaker tells him, "sir it will cost you £5000 to fly her body home or £50 to bury her here." The Scotsman says, "fly her body home." The undertaker says, "but sir you don't understand for £50 you can bury her in the holyland." The Scotsman replies "listen mate many many years ago a man named Jesus was buried here and he rose from the dead after 3 days so fly her ****ing body home...!"

 

I've read this somewhere else and only seconds ago.