saints_forever

After my other half saying "Yes" to those all important 4 words last Tuesday, we now have the fun task of planning. Unfortunately, we have a limited amount of money to play with - mortgage, bills and little savings don't help!

We've asked family if they would help with wedding bits rather than a 'wedding gift', so we have one making us a cake, one making a wedding dress, one hopefully making the rings and another sorting us a car for the occasion (apparently my Scoob with a bow around just won't cut it). For the day we are also contemplating scrapping the sit down meal and just having the evening buffet.

Anyone have any other tips for cost cutting that doesn't involve eloping to Gretna Green and tying the knot without anybody knowing - a combined family of 72 would not be pleased!!

Tidgy

elvis - £50
witnes £10 each

£70 wedding, or is it only vegas you can do that? lol

Leslie

Hope it all goes well,sorry can't think of anything much else to save money on what is such a special day. Any half reasonable guest will understand about your need to keep costs down.

Les

Gear Head

iTrader: (2)

I have the answer to all your problems.....


....Just tell her that you have changed your mind!

Tidgy

touch much maybe??? lol

saints_forever

Thanks. I'm hoping the same as well, trying to emphasise its about us rather than the glamour!

Haha. I'll run it by her lol!!

bustaMOVEs

iTrader: (31)

Dont mean to sound funny so I'll appolagise now.

But you can't scrimp on your wedding, after all it's the most special day of your lives and will only be done once in your life (hopefully).
Get a loan or something, and you can still save if you plan ahead and compare prices with others instead of just saying yes to the first thing you see.
Hope you the best and hope its what you want, and good luck .

B0DSKI

iTrader: (17)

Believe me mate as soon as you mention the wedding the price doubles.

I'm planning mine for August this year and finding it scary how much things cost.

Example....Photographer. Quotes ranging from £750-£1800 for half a days work!! How does that make sense ???

Gear Head

iTrader: (2)

I competely disagree with getting a loan for a wedding.
Friends of ours did it and they have only just finished paying it off after 5 years! It was a £20,000 loan I think. Yes, it was a great day, very nice setting, food etc. But they are the ones that regretted it as they haven't had any spare cash over the last 5 years. Obviously, this then puts a lot of pressure on the newly weds.

We saved for ours. I had some savings anyway, sold the scoob (don't even go there! ) and family helped with the cake, catering and hall.

All in, including the honeymoon at £3k, we spent just shy of £10k.

Do yourself a favour, if you need a loan to get married, then you can't afford it. There is no shame in admitting that. Don't start married life with a massive new debt around your neck!

May be it would have best to ask the question on here before you 'popped the question'!

saints_forever

We were debating about getting a loan but 'we' (her lol) don't want to start out married life in debt, which I completely see. My argument is we have a joint mortgage, loan and credit card already, so a little more wont hurt. The thing against it is that we are paying for a day (a very memorable one) which will be in the past and we won't see any future/present 'benefit' from it.

It's crazy how one word changes things.....I'm wondering if we can get away with venue wise as saying its a party gathering?! Luckily, photographer is another freebie we have (apart from the print costs etc), one of our friends does it, forgot to mention that above.

CrisPDuk

We got married in Aviemore, specifically to avoid all the problems you are about to have. We paid for immediate family and close friends to get there and stay over for a couple of nights, and told everyone else that they were more than welcome, but they had to pay their own way

It had the desired effect, none of the parasites from my mother's side of the family bothered showing up

As for photographs, unless you really want the big flash album you'll never look at again, just ask everyone attending to take loads of pictures (everyone has decent quality digital cameras these days) and collect them up afterwards. We did that ten years ago and got some really great photos from it

saints_forever

We did have a chat before I got on one knee and if we don't do it now we would never be able to afford it. We've been together 8 years and have relatively close future plans for little sprogs, as we don't wont to leave it too late down the line. Once that happens we will be stone broke and will have a really cheap and bad wedding haha

CrisPDuk

Absolutely agree with this

At least two couples I know have done the whole massive debt, big wedding thing, and the marriages almost didn't survive the stress involved in getting free of the debt

ReallyReallyGoodMeat

Watch some Don't Tell The Bride for some inspiration

scoobynutta555

After paying for the entire wedding 4 years ago I'm now paying for the divorce. My advice on saving money? Quite simple don't do it, especially if you had significant assets beforehand like I had. I'm completely anti marriage now, even to the extent I'll turn down the next invite I get to one.

saints_forever

We've already been told to apply by the mother-in-law to be haha :

Orangio

It's not just half a day work though, there's all of the post production work that goes into hours of tweaking/editing photo's, plus costs for materials, Insurance, cost of travelling, computer software, camera kit, depreciation of kit.

There's more to it than you think

bustaMOVEs

iTrader: (31)

Guys I can understand with loans etc, nobody wants to have debt, a lot of unessesry stuff is not needed.
I saved for mine and tbh total was around £10k and £3k for honeymoon.
Op is good in going for a buffet instead of a sit down meal as that can get pricey dependant on numbers. And it good if you can get friends and family to help in other areas like cake etc will save a lot.
Photographers are a rip off IMO, shop around or ask friends if they know someone, we got a friend of a friend in and he charged £500 for whole day into evening and just took photos and gave us the memory stick to do what we want with it.
There is loads of things you can save on if you reaserch well enough.
The cars I got for free as I just borrowed mates car, a GTR and a jag XFR so win win and a surprise phantom but only stayed for a few photos.
The only thing that costs a lot is venue and size you want.

billythekid

Each to their own, IMHO.
Do what both of YOU want. Not what someone else wants.

Alan Jeffery

The wedding itself shouldn't cost much.
Only virgins should wear stupid great white frocks!
Themed weddings are a hoot.
Pick a pub with a skittle alley for the reception, an inter family match breaks the ice.
Get a really good photographer.
Let people buy their own drinks, you get less drunks and most of the others will be driving anyway.
Go on Honeymoon, and if you have to, spend decent money on that. Go to the Med and give exotic countries a miss to avoid beri beri or whatever.

Finally, get the MARRIAGE right. The wedding is just a bit of fun on the day. Spend mega bucks and all you are left with is a chuffin great anticlimax.

We did most of the above and we're still happily together a quarter century later.

P1Fanatic

Having recently got married (last may) it is very easy to get carried away and when they say the average cost of a wedding in the UK is £20k they are not joking. It seems everything starts at £1k. Therefore it is a balance between not getting in debt and making it a day to remember. Try and give yourselves a bit more time and pay things off as you go along. Many vendors will take a deposit and then want the balance a few weeks before. Better to pay it off as you go imho or at least put it to one side. Otherwise it’s a big hit at the end and there is always last minute stuff you need to get.

I would say one thing I would not scrimp on is your photographer as the photos will be your only memory of the special day. Just because a friend has a DSLR does not make them a good wedding photographer and we know plenty of people who wish they had done their research better and spent a little extra. I would suggest going for just a pictures package where you get all the pics of the day on disk. You can then do an album in your own time and maybe with money you received as wedding gifts. Some do discounts for off peak weddings and even if they don’t ask – I did and saved a couple of hundred quid.

Oh and our photographer provided a framed signature board around an engagement picture. All our guests signed it on the day rather than a book and we then stuck one of our wedding photos in it and hung it in our hallway. Nice memento.

Buffet is a good idea. Just make sure plenty of it as if people are attending most of the day then they will be starving.

If you haven’t sorted a venue then look for one that does cheaper rates on the less popular days like weekdays. We cut our venue cost in half by getting married on a Thursday. We thought we might get a few drop outs what with people getting off work and collecting kids from school but only had 2 people from 80 decline their invites for genuine reasons. There are also some venues that offer an entire wedding package at a reduce rate for dates not booked if you are flexible.

Stationery – do it yourself. Invites you pay for everything they do i.e. assembly of inserts, adding a bow. We got ours printed but put them together ourselves = far cheaper. Seating plan, place names etc we all printed out at home and still looked great (mostly down to the wife who is creative not me but plenty of ideas online).

Clothing – try and cut down the number of ushers & bridesmaids if you can. I had to rent 8 suits inc my own. Got them all to buy their shoes though.


Maybe save some money on your honeymoon by doing a shortbreak after the wedding and a proper honeymoon later in the year.

Oh and my last tip is do a wedding website. You can send out the URL in your invites and guests can do everything there from RSVP’ing to submitting dietary requirements, song requests, check local accommodation, car parking etc etc. We used gettingmarried.co.uk but our site is now offline. Totally free and you can customise it all to your requirements.

bigfootjim76

iTrader: (1)

gona be negative here but hey ho,

save up or go without, the day is about getting married not how much you spend to impress people who you only see at wedding funrels etc etc, we did our wedding for less than £4000

we were lucky im a chef in event catering so have contacts for all the bits to make an ****ty village hall look good, drapes for walls ,funky chairs, family that made all the table cloths etc etc

but the point is we started our married life in debt as the year before we brought an house then the market crashed late 2007,

she left me in 2010 for an bloke who owes his house out right lets just put it that way shall we,

spin forward to 2013 and we still both owe £30000 for a house we sold last march!

i think your thinking about not getting into anymore debt is a wise one and money doesnt make the day its how you appoach it !

and what p1fanatic says is spot on sarahreno ;-) did our photos and frame which went down really well, and we made our own invites between sex lol and table planner etc etc it was a great laugh and one of the best periods of our 9 years together, bet your laughing but a bj while making the flowers to put on your own wedding cake will be never forgotten lol

good luck

james

P1Fanatic

Fair enough if they are good and are maybe doing you a mates rate but I would be very wary of the quality of work you would get from someone charging £500. That was one area I do not advise scrimping on. Make sure you check their recent work as should have copies of wedding shoots they have done. Whilst good kit and experience is a big part of it I would say it also comes down to personality and how they interact with you and your guests. Ours were almost like one of the guests and you can see that from the very natural photo’s where the guests had no idea they were being photographed but when it came to organisation it was almost like having a master of ceremonies to guide is through everything. Other things that a reputable and certified photographer will provide is cover in case they go sick at the last minute. And probably a pre-shoot at the venue so you can get used to being in front of the camera and they can see where to get some great shots if they haven’t been there before.

Do not get sold on those that need to take you away for 1.5-2hrs to do “posed” shots. Your wife will get annoyed and your guests probably will as well.

tubbytommy

iTrader: (20)

dont worry about the wedding cost, wait until you try and divorce her......

P1Fanatic

Btw wedding list wise there are quite a few travel agents who will run a gift list for you where guests can chip in some money towards your honeymoon rather than spunk it on stuff for the house that you will likely never used.

billythekid

Our costs for our night time party (married overseas) at a hotel were about £65/ppn. Included food (buffet) and outside catering, alcohol, DJ, flowers etc etc.

If the guests wanted to stay they could but they had to pay - although the hotel gave them a good rate.

hill79

Figure out where your priorities lay in what you want out of the day. Obviously the key thing is the ceremony, the actual act of saying your vows in front of the vicar. Everything else beyond that is something you don't strictly need to 'get married' and its these things that cost so much. Getting hitched, having your family and friends there to witness it and then having a big knees-up would make for a damn fine wedding without the need to spend a small fortune.

Ant

Go abroad best thing we did. Better chance of not having ****ty weather too

^Qwerty^

Our wedding = dress because she wanted one, registry office, lunch down the pub, and back to our house for a night do buffet, footy on the street and a general good laugh with a few drinks. Total cost ~£1000. We had the most enjoyable day and so did the 20 odd people who came.
My sister’s wedding: dress, bridesmaids dresses, all the blokes in silly suits, minster, singer, choir, bells rung, god knows how many guests, lavish lunch, equally lavish evening do, video, cars, breakfast drinks, you name it, they had it. Oh, they also had some ‘family breakfast’ on Sunday morning as well. (Tangent) Me and the Mrs walked out of the evening do at around 21:30hrs after the grooms father decided to start having a go at us for not attending said ‘family breakfast’ the following morning, citing ‘family’ as important. Pikey c%nt. Anyway, they didn’t get much change out of £30k. They looked stressed and hassled all day.
So why are you getting married, to show some commitment to the one you love, or to try out do all your friends and have the best, most lavish wedding yet?
Work out what you want out of a wedding and stick to it, because you’ll have all sorts of people, mainly the immediate family, sticking their ore in trying to tell you what you must and must not do, and they are the ones who will end up costing you thousands. Ask yourself, who is the wedding for and keeping asking yourselves every time the price goes up by a K.

Dr Hu

Pics - never looked at the album since.
Video - never ever watched it!
Wedding Cake - mate had loads of cupcakes made by his mum - great! looked good too!

They seem important on the day....... looking back, not really!
You just have a silly hairstyle when u view them in 10yrs time.