J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

Oops, in trouble with the rest of the family, there was some of last nights Civilian Curry that needed some pep to make it acceptable, it was very nice but it was a little tame, so into the mix went a packet of Lazy Chilli, a few Old El Paso Chillis and I decided that I needed more Chicken seeing as the kids had nicked it all last night and left mainly Sauce and Veg, I fried Said Chicken with 5 Finger Chilli's, quite strong for Sainsbury's but eaten raw they were not debillitating, just a little fiesty, no involuntary retching, just a nice burn.

So, Banged another five in for good measure, ate two raw and washed it down with some discount Stella, Planet Rock on the Radio, door open and next door but ones Daughters birthday noisily but happily blaring away in the background, the rest of my brood was in front of the telly watching "Britains Got Mentals, lets laugh at them", all was well, "Hotel California" was on, just as the "Warm Smell of Colitas" line came on youngest came in and started coughing, then ran out leaving the door open, the dog scuttled out likes its **** was on fire, then two minutes later the missus entered like someone had deployed a nerve agent, coughing and cursing, she binned the rest of the Chillis and berated me for cooking such evil stuff, she has speculated about the state of my digestive tract.

So, banned from cooking hot food, destined for blandness, she calmed down and asked me whether I could eat the result of my labours, guess what, it was a bit tame, I think frying them just releases all the heat into the air !

Anyone else made their family suffer in this way ?

mart360

Evil nasty man

Why is it people who like strong spicy stuff, chilli's included, think that if

your cooking, everyone else should share your deranged tastes???


If you want your arseole burnt to a crisp, and your digestive tract scarred

for life, may i make a suggestion?

Caustic soda !

Prehaps then you might understand that comments such as "its a mild

one" or "i only used 100000000000 chilli's" coming from someone who has

no taste buds, or fully functioning digestive system means sod all to the

poor sod who has to endure your vile concoctions!!!


Mart

alcazar

iTrader: (2)

Worst I ever did was eat mussels in saffron cream sauce for lunch and Paella for tea.

Couldn't stop f*rting all night, produced one about every ten minutes ALL night!

When I got up to go for a whizz later and walked back into the bedroom, it made MY eyes water

vindaloo

Best story I've heard is when you accidentally drop an entire packet of chilli powder onto a hot stove.

Mate + mate's GF had to evacuate kitchen and close the door as they couldn't breathe. Then take deep breaths, go "in" and attempt a clean-up, then dash out before they had to take a breath. Clean-up involved actually turning off the burners and/or switching off the power.

I used to make large vats of chilli for fireworks night celebrations. We found that chilli oils tend to float, making the first couple of servings erm... perilous.

J.