Oldest are the best - joke time :D
#1
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A girl asks her boyfriend to come over Friday night to have dinner
with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl told her
boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he
takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the counter, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms 3-pack, 10-pack, or a family pack.
"I'm REALLY going to give it to this girl," the boy tells the
pharmacist. "I intend to plug every orifice in her body at LEAST twice!!"
The pharmacist, with a laugh, suggests the family pack, saying the boy will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!" The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated.
The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute
passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer with his head down.
10 minutes pass and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans
over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a
f***ing pharmacist!!"
with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl told her
boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time.
Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he
takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex.
At the counter, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms 3-pack, 10-pack, or a family pack.
"I'm REALLY going to give it to this girl," the boy tells the
pharmacist. "I intend to plug every orifice in her body at LEAST twice!!"
The pharmacist, with a laugh, suggests the family pack, saying the boy will be rather busy, it being his first time and all.
That night, the boy shows up at the girls parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!" The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated.
The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. A minute
passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer with his head down.
10 minutes pass and still no movement from the boy.
Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans
over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."
The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a
f***ing pharmacist!!"
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