SwissTony

iTrader: (19)

Two Red Indians and an Irishman were walking through the woods.
All of a sudden one of the Red Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave.

'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' he called into the cave and listened closely until he heard an answering, 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo!
He then tore off his clothes and ran into the cave.

The Irishman was puzzled and asked the remaining Indian what it was all about,. 'Was the other Indian crazy or what?'

The Indian replied 'No, It is our custom during mating season when Indian men see cave, they holler 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' into the opening. If they get an answer back, it means there's a beautiful squaw in there waiting for us.

Just then they came upon another cave.
The second Indian ran up to the cave, stopped, and hollered, 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!'
Immediately, there was the answer. 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' from deep inside.

He also tore off his clothes and ran into the opening.

The Irishman wandered around in the woods alone for a while, and then spied a third large cave.
As he looked in amazement at the size of the huge opening, he was thinking, 'Hoo, man! Look at the size of this cave! It is bigger than those the Indians found. There must be some really big, fine women in this cave!'

He stood in front of the opening and hollered with all his might
'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' Like the others, he then heard an answering call, 'WOOOOOOOOO, WOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOO!'
With a gleam in his eye and a smile on his face, he raced into the cave,tearing off his clothes as he ran.


The following day, the headline of the local newspaper read...............





























NAKED IRISHMAN RUN OVER BY TRAIN!!!

Gear Head

iTrader: (2)

Very good.

mrtheedge2u2

Paddy goes to a car boot sale.... reversed in and sold his engine...

mrtheedge2u2

How did the Irishman burn his ear?


He was doing the ironing when his phone rang

mrtheedge2u2

Two parrots sat on a perch..... one turns round and says 'can you smell fish'??

Tam the bam

Reminds me a bit of the Parrot joke.

Guy goes to the pet shop and buys a talking Parrot and takes it home, that evening he brings a lass home, as soon as they get down to business the parrot starts squawking 'You,re gonna get fukced, You,re gonna get fukced!' The lass jumps up and leaves the house!

This happen for a few weeks, every time the guy brings a lass home and they're getting down to business the Parrot squawks 'You,re gonna get fukced, You,re gonna get fukced!' and the girls leave!

So pissed off the guy goes back to the pet shop to complain. He tells the shop owner what the problem is and, he says, 'I've got the perfect solution, that Owl over there is absolutely sex mad, and the reason your Parrot is acting the way he is, is jealousy, he can't get it so nor will you'

Thinking the Parrot will nail the sex mad Owl he buys it in the hope he can get his leg over in peace. So he takes the Owl home and puts it on the perch next to the Parrot, but the Parrot aint interested, he just turns his back on it. Even when the Owl does it's best to get a bit of Parrot boaby, the Parrot just aint interested, this goes on for a few weeks until the guy brings back a lass, they start getting down to business, the Parrot aint saying a word.

He turns looks at the Owl then back at the guy and his lass getting down to it, then suddenly squawks 'You,re gonna get fukced, You,re gonna get fukced!'

The excited Owl replies 'WHOOOOO WHOOOOO!!!!'

The Parrot replies.......










'Not you, ya puffy faced ba$tard!!!'

mrtheedge2u2

What's red and white and sits in a tree???









A Sanitary Owl

mrtheedge2u2

Little Red Riding Hood is skipping through the forest when she sees a big bad wolf behind a tree

‘ooooh, what big ears you have..’ says Red Riding Hood

The wolf walks off and goes behind another tree

‘ooooh, what big eyes you have…’ says Red Riding Hood

The wolf is getting angry and walks off behind another tree

‘ooooh, what biiiig teeth you have….’ Says Little Red

The wolf turns round and says ‘Fukk off, I’m trying to take a ****!’

STi-Frenchie

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, 'Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building.'

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, 'Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too.'

The blond guy opened his lunch and said, 'Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too.'

The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.

The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.

The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping.. She said, 'If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!'

The Mexican's wife also wept and said, 'I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much.'

Everyone turned and stared at the blonde guys wife. The blonde's wife said,

'Don't look at me. He makes his own lunch..'

Lee247

TelBoy

I don't get the parrot "joke" at all

mrtheedge2u2

hahahahahahahahahahaha TelBoy..... think about it

TelBoy

The "whoooooo" of an owl is supposed to sound like the word who, right? Tenuous.

mrtheedge2u2

hahahaha....... the owl thinks the parrot is talking to her

Fat Boy

Why are Irish jokes so stupid?

So the English can understand them...

BOB.T

A Red Indian goes into a hotel,

RI: I'd like a room please
Receptionist: OK, do you have a reservation?

Leslie

Made me laugh Swiss.

Les