A joke for a rainy wednesday afternoon
09 July 2008, 05:42 PM
#1
A joke for a rainy wednesday afternoon
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther,I'd like to ride in that helicopter.'
Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars'
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.'
To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'
The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride
and not say a word, I won't charge you! But if you say one word, it's fifty dollars.'
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy manoeuvres, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again,
but still not a word.
When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'
Morris replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!'
09 July 2008, 07:06 PM
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Old one, but always gets me smiling! 
Two guys walk into a bar, and they both have black eyes. "How did you get your black eye?" asks the first guy.
"Well, it was a slip of the tongue. You see, I was walking through the park one day when I saw a woman with three beautiful children. I walked up to her to compliment her on her children, but when I tried to say, "You have some lovely kiddies," I accidentally said, You have some lovely *******. So she slapped me and gave me this black eye."
" How about you, how did you get your black eye?"
"Well, I too had a slip of the tongue. I was sitting down to breakfast with my wife of thirty-two years, and I tried to say, 'Would you please pass the Cornflakes?' but instead I said, 'You ruined my life you ****ing bitch."
Two guys walk into a bar, and they both have black eyes. "How did you get your black eye?" asks the first guy.
"Well, it was a slip of the tongue. You see, I was walking through the park one day when I saw a woman with three beautiful children. I walked up to her to compliment her on her children, but when I tried to say, "You have some lovely kiddies," I accidentally said, You have some lovely *******. So she slapped me and gave me this black eye."
" How about you, how did you get your black eye?"
"Well, I too had a slip of the tongue. I was sitting down to breakfast with my wife of thirty-two years, and I tried to say, 'Would you please pass the Cornflakes?' but instead I said, 'You ruined my life you ****ing bitch."
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