Car scratched up - caught him red-handed, but what next?
23 May 2008, 08:41 PM
#1
Car scratched up - caught him red-handed, but what next?
For the second time in as many months one of our cars has been vandalised.
The first time, my wife's Focus was scratched all down one side. Got that fixed under NCB protection, so it didn't cost anything. This time its my car's turn. I have a Passat Variant which isn't a year old yet and its been scratched all down both sides - in a single continuous stroke on each side. Not a panel was missed.
I caught the culprit just finishing off the leading edge of the bonnet and I'm totally fuming about it. Unfortunately I can't call the police as the 'evil vandal' in question is our own 3 year old son
. And to make matters worse I was nearby all the time he was doing it. I sold a weber bbq this evening on the Dutch equivalent of e-bay, and busy helping the buyer load it in his car. Saw my lad walking around close to the Passat a couple of times, but didn't notice the stone in his hand as he did so until it was too late. 
The car is a lease car provided by my employer. The lease car company is owned by my employer and the insurance company is also theirs. I think I have 3rd party liability cover on my house policy - which is also from my employer. Think I can get out of this relatively unscathed.
Question is what punishment for the boy? Don't think the ' naughty step' is going to be enough this time!
Ideas?
The first time, my wife's Focus was scratched all down one side. Got that fixed under NCB protection, so it didn't cost anything. This time its my car's turn. I have a Passat Variant which isn't a year old yet and its been scratched all down both sides - in a single continuous stroke on each side. Not a panel was missed.
I caught the culprit just finishing off the leading edge of the bonnet and I'm totally fuming about it. Unfortunately I can't call the police as the 'evil vandal' in question is our own 3 year old son
. And to make matters worse I was nearby all the time he was doing it. I sold a weber bbq this evening on the Dutch equivalent of e-bay, and busy helping the buyer load it in his car. Saw my lad walking around close to the Passat a couple of times, but didn't notice the stone in his hand as he did so until it was too late. The car is a lease car provided by my employer. The lease car company is owned by my employer and the insurance company is also theirs. I think I have 3rd party liability cover on my house policy - which is also from my employer. Think I can get out of this relatively unscathed.
Question is what punishment for the boy? Don't think the ' naughty step' is going to be enough this time!
Ideas?
23 May 2008, 08:47 PM
#3
Before the PC crowd get here... I suggest using that stone to cave his....
mmm.. bit extreme ....
Maybe take him on holiday to ... infraction if I finish that ...
take someone from him he loves... tell him scratching the car is hurting mummy or daddy cause it's their car and tell him he will lose .. teddy ... doll whatever.. something he loves ... don't bin it.. but keep it from him for a while so he understands the hurt ..
mmm.. bit extreme ....
Maybe take him on holiday to ...
infraction if I finish that ...take someone from him he loves... tell him scratching the car is hurting mummy or daddy cause it's their car and tell him he will lose .. teddy ... doll whatever.. something he loves ... don't bin it.. but keep it from him for a while so he understands the hurt ..
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23 May 2008, 09:05 PM
#9
When I'm angry with him I let him guess the degree of anger. It goes from "slightly cross" for messy eating through "angry" for not listening and then on to "super furious" for when he clouts his little brother with any hard object. "mega super furious" hasn't been hit yet. This was just "furious" and after he had guessed rightly I shouted at him once that he must not scratch cars and he then immediately burst into tears. And then I felt bad of course.
I think I'll take a hammer to his "Roary the Racing Car". That'll learn him!!
23 May 2008, 09:05 PM
#10
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Explain the value of the damage he's done, and as a consequence Mummy & Daddy won't be able to afford his birthday or Xmas pressies this year, or maybe the family holiday.
And use a compass to scratch 'T W A T' into his forehead to serve as a lasting reminder
And use a compass to scratch 'T W A T' into his forehead to serve as a lasting reminder
23 May 2008, 09:10 PM
#11
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made my arm laugh
23 May 2008, 09:15 PM
#13
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You gonna practise what you preach in the coming years then CB ?
LOL
DunxC
P.S. Scratch HIS first car in a few years time....
LOL
DunxC
P.S. Scratch HIS first car in a few years time....
23 May 2008, 09:17 PM
#14
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23 May 2008, 09:39 PM
#17
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Clip round the ear and sent to bed with no supper, like the old days, would sort it - with the added bonus that he would never do it again....
Of course we are not allowed to do that anymore. Oh well, just have to live with it then...
Of course we are not allowed to do that anymore. Oh well, just have to live with it then...
23 May 2008, 09:49 PM
#18
23 May 2008, 10:32 PM
#19
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i was going to suggest the same thing
or threaten him with "wait until your mother gets home..."windyboy
23 May 2008, 10:54 PM
#21
Thanks for the tips. 
And the cracking "wind the baby" joke.
The missus got home an hour ago and wasn't best-pleased that her car was almost certainly 'done' by him too. And to think we were toying with the idea of putting in cctv bullet cams to catch someone in the act. Interested to see if he has the guts to own up to his previous acts when confronted.
The next step is pretty much decided now. After talking it through with my better half, I'm going to take him into the garage with 3 toy cars of his choice and then wreck the most-worn one in front of him - with the warning that the other one's will get it too if he ever does anything like that again. I'll do it after we come back from swimming tomorrow and report back here.
And the cracking "wind the baby" joke. The missus got home an hour ago and wasn't best-pleased that her car was almost certainly 'done' by him too. And to think we were toying with the idea of putting in cctv bullet cams to catch someone in the act. Interested to see if he has the guts to own up to his previous acts when confronted.
The next step is pretty much decided now. After talking it through with my better half, I'm going to take him into the garage with 3 toy cars of his choice and then wreck the most-worn one in front of him - with the warning that the other one's will get it too if he ever does anything like that again. I'll do it after we come back from swimming tomorrow and report back here.
23 May 2008, 11:02 PM
#23
Yeah, but I like going swimming with him. There's no other way a bloke of 40+ can legitimately have multiple goes on the 80 metre waterslide. Or leer at yummy mummys
23 May 2008, 11:18 PM
#25
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Two things - you get angry or 'slightly cross' for messy eating? FFS - He's 3. He can't help it..... Then you are going to toast his favorite car in the garage. Can I suggest that you let messy eating go until he is about 6, and for now, tell him that scoring your car makes you sad. This little chap worships you and his Mum. If you want to teach him the benefit of revenge, go ahead and wreck his toy. If you want to teach him the value of respect, make sure you tell him how sad you and Mum are as a result of the damage. But remember, when he hits 13, do you want him to think revenge or respect?
23 May 2008, 11:56 PM
#26
FB I hear what you are saying and it does sound fundamentally right and perhaps something to try when he's older. He is bi-lingual and (appears) intelligent in most respects, but is also 'quite a busy child' and simply talking to him just doesn't stick. In one ear and out the other mostly. I want to help him to appreciate that such 'exteme' negative and disrespectful behaviour is unwanted and has consequences with something he will remember, but without damaging him in any way. I plan to demonstrate this with a toy that would get thrown away pretty soon, rather than anything that is actually dear to him right now. Even I'm not that mean.
24 May 2008, 12:04 AM
#27
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Suresh.... I've been through the heap. A sad Mum or Dad who would have to stop being your friend if it happens again seems to work far better than kicking the **** out of the little *******.
If talking to him 'doesn't stick' you are not talking loudly enough
If talking to him 'doesn't stick' you are not talking loudly enough
