gpssti4

iTrader: (6)

Silly discussion yesterday.

Mate says that you can milk any female animal. I thought that he meant, cows, goats, sheep etc. But, oh no, he's talking cats, dogs, rats!!!!

So, can you?

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

Potentially as the young of said animal manage to get fed, however it would be time consuming, the yields small and of dubious flavour, we just get ours from Sainsbury's.

gpssti4

iTrader: (6)

WOW cat milk for Sainsbury's, guess the farmer has small hands.

richiewong

Scroll down

Rolling Dog Ranch Animal Sanctuary: September 10, 2006 - September 16, 2006

Also didn't a bloke in 'Dune' have to milk a cat in order not to die

shep ppp

Meet the parents mentioned milking a cat

kingofturds

iTrader: (1)

Can't milk birds or reptiles

Mr Toe (nee Blair)

You WILL be reported to the RSPCA for animal cruelty How would you like it if a ***** milked your loins

wrx-ian

Not ssure about a cat.
But i did see a farm last week selling Donkey milk
Really did not know you could drink that.

J4CKO

iTrader: (1)

Diesel

PMSL [PUSSING MYSELF LAUGHING]

cdfracing

Iam actually in tears reading this thread ! Nice one !

cdfracing

Real quote !!!!

How to...Milk a Cat

Should you run out of normal milk, cat milk is a bit watery, but tastier than coffee mate.

Step one.
Get a pair of mating cats.

Step two.
When kittens arrive, now is the time to start the cat milking process.

Step three.
You will need to make a "Schmitten". This is made by:

Kitten fur (plucked from a kitten - be nice to the little bligher)
Glue the fur to a glove or sock
Connect a straw or tube to a squeezee rubber bulb (You know what I mean)
Make sure that theres no leaking by testing it (If you have a pregnant wife, then that will do)
Step four.
Now that your Schmitten is complete, it showtime (or sucking time). When the mother is feeding her little ones, gently tease one of them away from the mothers teat and swiftly add your schmitten to the teat (Not toot). You may need to distract the mother by pretending to be a donkey (Just for fun of course).

Step five.
When the teat is empty, move to the next one. Soon you'll have enough for a bowl of cornflakes.

PLEASE NOTE: I do not encourage any form of animal abuse. I do not consider "Cat Milking" to be animal abuse. If you are attacked and permanently scarred by the cat, then I hold no responsibility. In fact, anything that happens to anyone is not my responsibility as this is just a bit of fun, so sue someone else.




So the answer is yes

EVOLUTION

interfering with your domestic pet im pretty sure is illegal, i think, and even if its not, it most definalty is wrong, pmsl

cdfracing

quoted from How to...Milk a Cat!

StickyMicky

the way around it is to design a machine that does it for you


maybe one of them robot vacuum cleaners with a few mods, the cat has to step over it at some point

EVOLUTION

pmsl


next project idea for you micky lol

pimmo2000

iTrader: (6)

LAMO

Luminous

iTrader: (3)

Uh!?

Are you really saying that cows have less rights than cats? You can shove a great machine onto a cow udders and leave it sucking away, but cannot obtain milk in a non-cruel way from a cat?

EVOLUTION

can you read,


or you one of these hillbillys that has cows as domestic pets pmsl

Luminous

iTrader: (3)

are you saying someone has never kept a cow as a domestic pet?

and my point was more along the lines of - why should a domestic pet have rights than a farm animal? If anything a farm animal should have more rights, as it is more likely to be treated in a "commercial profit making manner", and therefore needs more protection.

Maybe our law is so daft that if a cow is kept on a farm you can milk it. But heaven forbid someone classes the token cow you keep round the back as a domestic pet. Cos if you go and milk poor daisy you get arrested while eating your cornflakes...

EVOLUTION

no, im not saying people dont, i know this world is full of wierdos so i would be silly to think such a thing. But that still doesnt mate it acceptable to keep poor daisy in the house, imagne the **** stains on the rug, christ lol


And to be fair, cows produce bloodly gallons of milk so its an industry, you want to go milk a heard of cats for a glass full of milk, then be my guest mate,


i suppose the quesrtion is, why would you want to milk cat

gpssti4

iTrader: (6)

I don't know. Would it be preferable to milk a dog for instance. Me I prefer cow's milk in my tea.

Just one further thought, how about milking a woman? How do you do that?

I'm just going to find the Mrs and find out

EVOLUTION

Luminous

iTrader: (3)

Yes, I think your last point sums it up.

It just amuses me as to what sort of daft laws we have in place, and the exceptions. Poor little kitten too ill to suckle properly, so cat lover milks cat to feed it.... Some of our PC brigade would want them serving life sentences

gpssti4

iTrader: (6)

Noooooo, that's just wrong.











I could be doing it for her

EVOLUTION

you can use baby milk for that sort of thing lol

imagine, children come home from school only to find daddy milking tiddles lol



think of the mental scarring they will endure for the rest of there natural lives lol

EVOLUTION

stuff that, clearly shes dropped a sprogg, i want nowt with those sorts lol

StickyMicky

but that makes her a MILF john

EVOLUTION

im not into milfs micky




whats gone on with people on here, everyones talking about homos, guns and doing wrong things to animals,


think i might go incase its contageous