eClaire

I have been speaking with friends over email the past wee while and I have realised I have a lot going on over the next five months:

Just bought a house, moving in and decorating needs done (absolutely EVERYTHING needs pulling off and doing again). Getting married in June and there is still LOADS to organise. To top this off I am 4 months pregnant and the baby is due on 1 October. I should be happy but when i think of the sheer volume of stuff I have to do it makes me .

I don't want to stress myself out, but I can't help it, it just happens. Does anyone do some form of meditation that they find effective? I don't want/can't really take herbal stuff and it's not as if I can do a strenuous work out to release it!

I just feel like crying; I know I am prone to be a bit emotional (I was fine this morning till I got thinking about it 10 minutes ago!) but I really don't want to let him/my family down I really probably shouldn't be broadcasting it on here but I want advice before I open my mouth to anyone! I should be able to cope if I just don't get stressed out! I want to be able to show that I am not completely useless!

jasey

If you think you've got it tough just think of your poor partner having to pay for it all too

eClaire

He isn't paying for it all though.

SiPie

Meditate on the fact that you are not in Ethiopia trying to find some water to survive or living in the Sudan facing genocide every day or etc etc etc .....

Real stress is suffered by rabbits when they face death evertime they stick their heads out their burrows, not humans who have enough food, drink and in most cases adequate shelter.

Humans have very little stress in their lives, only what they perceive as stress

On a slightly more serious note, get out and walk more, read a few books by Dr Claire Weekes, make some to-do lists to save you overworking your memory when your hormones will be going daft and enjoy what should be one of the most happiest times of your life.

PS Good luck

Brendan Hughes

I think you've already done a good thing by talking about it. Bottling it up just makes it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

As long as you talk about it with hubby to be in a fairly positive way ("what do we need to do to achieve all this" rather than "we're never gonna make it"), it'll be October before you know it.

And don't forget to give yourself a weekend off every now and then, the more so when it comes to Baby Day.

Good luck

jasey

Have I just added to your woes

It could be worse - the Tories could get back in !

The more you worry the worse it gets - be like me and say to yourself - "F*ck it - If It goes ***** up I'll still be breathing"

eClaire

With all due respect Simon, put yourself in my shoes, it really isn't that easy.

As for the to do list I have just printed out a wedding one (my main priority at the moment, although I get the keys for the house on Friday ), but it doesn't help that it's about 16 fooking pages long!!!!

sti-04!!

Stay of SN & go do what you have to do

Come back in a weeks time & you will feel a different person (not look a different person )

eClaire

Not really, it's just that it bugs when people assume he is paying for it when most of the money is coming from me/my family!

As for politics, that is the least of my worries right now.

I can't let it ***** up, there is a child involved that needs a safe and loving home! It's not as if I can put the pregnancy if - it's going to happen whether I like it or not! That's whats scaring me - I NEED to get these things done.

Stress isn't good for an unborn baby - it can lead to chronic health problems; that's why I started this thread, I don't want to stress out!

Mice_Elf

Make yourself a list of achievable goals for every day. They don't have to be huge goals, just ones that you know you can do. Things like "Sort flowers", "Call x re Y" etc. Pick one room that needs re-decorating and make a start, but don't overdo it! Again - achievable things like "strip wallpaper", or just "clear space to make a start". Decorating doesn't absolutely HAVE to be done, unless it's mouldy or anything. Baby isn't going to worry about a perfectly decorated room!

Then tick off those ones that you've done. Even small goals feel insurmountable when your hormones are up the shoot.

Failing that, get out and have a walk, go for a swim or even shut off the phone and have a warm bubble bath with full on face-pack and lit candles!

Above all else, get help in. If you can delegate a few jobs to your other half, do so, as stress, worry and doing too much won't be good for you or the baby.

eClaire

you're only saying that cos I said it myself in an email.


Truth is it is scary and I am probably hiding from it

sti-04!!

You cant hide from the bump, its coming to get you

Seriously just chill

imlach

Key to weddings is to plan as early as possible. Everyone seems to plan weddings about 2 years in advance these days.....so those planning them 2 months in advance finds every band/venue/caterer/dress shop/cakemaker/florist/carhire/bushire/etc booked up!!! Nuts!

Been there, done that!!!

imlach

ps Swimming is probably the best thing you can do right now. Get him to pay for a nice spa like OneSpa at the Sheraton.......

Brendan Hughes

Rubbish - just hold it on a Friday. Did ours in less than 4 weeks

(Bit low-key though....)

imlach

I'm not saying it's impossible as ours was done in a shortish time, but it just adds to the stress when phoning around and patronising cakemakers saying "Oh, I need 6 months notice to make a cake"....err...can do one in my oven overnight love So we did

SiPie

With all due respect Claire... you don't have the slightest clue in relation to what has gone / goes on in my life and that includes anything you may of heard about me 2nd hand from Kenny. I would happily put myself in your shoes (excluding the pain bit of the childbirth...no thanks) and I assure you, I'd find it easy. I did weigh up what you had going on in your life prior to posting.

May I suggest that you are perhaps a person who is prone to episodes of being somewhat melodramatic about things ?

Not meaning to be nasty but millions of people would love to be in your shoes...

Think about it.

Imlach has given you the best practical advice re the swimming

sti-04!!

*grabs popcorn*

jasey

Booked Edinburgh Registrars, Booked Hotel for two nights Got Married - Took about 20 minutes on the phone .

However - two years earlier we started down the Church - Photographer - Reception - Carribean honeymoon route - 10 minutes in I told the now wife - If you want to go through all this bollox I'll see you on the day (Just after the first meeting with her parents where we were told who was coming and what we were going to eat ).

eClaire - If you let it get to you it will destroy you - go with the flow - All you can do is plan for everything you know - people will let you down - If you expect it then it wont be so hard to handle when it DOES Happen. If it doesn't happen that's a bonus !

So long as the baby is healthy it and you wont give a **** about the house !

eClaire

All I wanted was advice on relaxation techniques.

What I meant, Simon, was try being pregnant - it's not very nice most of the time, especially when it is your first - do you know what worries fly through your head when carrying your first? With added worries like buying a house, and trying to organise a wedding by myself doesn't do the blood pressure any good - as I said it could cause problems for the baby. I wanted advice on relaxation techniques, perhaps stress was the wrong word to use but by no means did it warrant a demeaning speech about 'real stress being suffered by rabbits who face death when they stick their head out of their burrows'.

You may find things easier than me but by no means does that mean I have had it easy, as you said I don't know about your life - as you don't know about the ****ey bits of mines (pre-kenny)! For example, Does stressing out about sleeping rough in the middle of November at 17 constitute as real stress? (And yes, I ended up doing it). I want things to be ok (I'm not saying perfect) for my kid. Give it things I didn't have. And right now, it is getting a bit too much.

Christ, I wish I never bothered now.

Mice, I am off to do a proper to do list as we speak. After I tell him that I am not doing it by myself. The bath is running as we speak

SiPie

That's nothing, quite tame compared to my usual

Most certainly does, and I'm gald you've found your feet since.

You are pregnant = your choice
You are getting married = your choice
You are moving house = your choice

Deal with it

I seriously wish you the best of luck, but please don't create stress out of nothing.

MJW

Claire, a lot of the stress can be put down to all the hormones flying around at the moment. Tricky situations will always be there but its how you react to them that governs how you feel about it. The most important thing is you and your baby's well-being ; everything else is largely irrelevant.
You could also try some yoga to try and relax a bit.

eClaire

I am trying to deal with it. I get worked up and need to relax! I can't help getting worked up and worry - it goes with being pregnant!!

My heart is working 50% harder than it does when I am not pregnant. Any extra stress is not healthy, for me or baby. Thats why I asked for relaxation techniques!

Bartop

oral sex - best relaxation on the planet.

Health warning..combine with Bath technique at own risk..

eClaire

LOL

imlach

Perineal massage, back massage, swimming, walking, being pampered (not all at same time unless you're a circus act!)
Can't go wrong.........

T4molie

eClaire,

I usually find running a hot bath, turning the lights down low and lay there with your eyes closed and think of something nice helps

Andy

MJW

Actually it is quite possible to go wrong with this one

Lee247

eClaire, Nice bubbly relaxing bath, dressing gown on and hubby to be, massaging your feet. Bliss. Oh and a very small glass of wine, now and again, won't harm the baby.

eClaire

It's my bifday today so I am not going to think about ANYTHING!

Going shopping soon, and possibly the Hearts v Hibs match later on tonight When I am there I will have a birthday Irn Bru