Funny thing happened today
12 December 2004, 11:36 PM
#1
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2000
Posts: 26,619
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Funny thing happened today
After the thread about Lord Goldsmith v's me for next PM, a strange coincedence happened today.
Took the wife and kids shopping (so the wife could sort pressies for my parents, my sister and my nephews
) We were in TK Max and I spotted a kid of about 14 hiding in a rail full of cloths. Every few seconds he would reach out, grab something off the shelf opposite and disappear from view. Watched him for a couple of minutes and then spotted a security man approaching. Another kid (aged about 6 ) ran up to the rail of cloths, pulled them apart and said "security", then runs off. First kid jumps out of his hiding place and is about to run, but by this time, the security man is straight in front of him. This is happening about two feet from where I am standing. Security man says "Stop", kid pulls a knife. Picture the scene - security man is about 5'2, 6 stone and going paler by the second. Kid is about 5'6, 7 stone and feeling braver by the second. I am 6', 13 stone and thinking "WTF" - so I did what comes natural - I hit the kid in the gob as hard as I could (I was right out of his line of sight, and not thinking particularly clearly.) I can honestly say that there are no words to describe the feeling of satisfaction when he dropped the knife, staggered sideways, made a half effort to turn towards me, got another Steven Segal styleeee punch in the gob, kick in the nuts and final headbut in the gob before going down like a snotter. Next thing I know, alarms go off, store door closes and a massive scrap beaks out. Turns out that of about 40 people in the store, 10 were customers, 10 were either PSNI or store security and the other 20 were two gangs of shoplifters.
Anyway - net result - 20 shoplifters scooped, PSNI guy asked me to come down sometime, view the tape and make a statement, although in his opinion 'I was protecting my family from the knife wielding maniac' - daughter now thinks I might be Batman or one of The Incredibles and my wrist hurts nearly as much as my knuckles.
Took the wife and kids shopping (so the wife could sort pressies for my parents, my sister and my nephews
) We were in TK Max and I spotted a kid of about 14 hiding in a rail full of cloths. Every few seconds he would reach out, grab something off the shelf opposite and disappear from view. Watched him for a couple of minutes and then spotted a security man approaching. Another kid (aged about 6 ) ran up to the rail of cloths, pulled them apart and said "security", then runs off. First kid jumps out of his hiding place and is about to run, but by this time, the security man is straight in front of him. This is happening about two feet from where I am standing. Security man says "Stop", kid pulls a knife. Picture the scene - security man is about 5'2, 6 stone and going paler by the second. Kid is about 5'6, 7 stone and feeling braver by the second. I am 6', 13 stone and thinking "WTF" - so I did what comes natural - I hit the kid in the gob as hard as I could (I was right out of his line of sight, and not thinking particularly clearly.) I can honestly say that there are no words to describe the feeling of satisfaction when he dropped the knife, staggered sideways, made a half effort to turn towards me, got another Steven Segal styleeee punch in the gob, kick in the nuts and final headbut in the gob before going down like a snotter. Next thing I know, alarms go off, store door closes and a massive scrap beaks out. Turns out that of about 40 people in the store, 10 were customers, 10 were either PSNI or store security and the other 20 were two gangs of shoplifters. Anyway - net result - 20 shoplifters scooped, PSNI guy asked me to come down sometime, view the tape and make a statement, although in his opinion 'I was protecting my family from the knife wielding maniac' - daughter now thinks I might be Batman or one of The Incredibles and my wrist hurts nearly as much as my knuckles.
Trending Topics
13 December 2004, 12:24 AM
#9
Scooby Regular
Shoplifting is rife in TKMax - the gangs are bunches of chavs/pikeys
Well done though ...... good beating a 14 year old up??
You 13 stone and 6 foot - me 6 foot and 20 stone, ME Tarzan - YOU Jane!!
Pete
Well done though ...... good beating a 14 year old up??
You 13 stone and 6 foot - me 6 foot and 20 stone, ME Tarzan - YOU Jane!!
Pete
13 December 2004, 12:27 AM
#12
Scooby Regular
Course its not him in the middle - thats Mr Muscles off the Oven cleaner Ads!!
Thats not someone who could beat up a 14 year old!! Anyway, why is he wearing a badge? Forgot his name!!??
Pete
Thats not someone who could beat up a 14 year old!! Anyway, why is he wearing a badge? Forgot his name!!??
Pete
13 December 2004, 12:34 AM
#14
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: In the naughty corner
Posts: 10,869
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by pslewis
You 13 stone and 6 foot - me 6 foot and 20 stone, ME Tarzan - YOU Jane!!
Last edited by TurboKitty; 13 December 2004 at 12:46 AM. Reason: Oops, forgot the apostrophe...Can't upset the pedants ;)
13 December 2004, 12:38 AM
#15
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 2,644
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by pslewis
Anyway, why is he wearing a badge? Forgot his name!!??
13 December 2004, 12:43 AM
#16
Scooby Regular
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2000
Posts: 26,619
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Originally Posted by pslewis
You 13 stone and 6 foot - me 6 foot and 20 stone, ME Tarzan - YOU Jane!!
Pete
Pete
Pete - I used to be a fat **** as well - amazing what you can do with excercise.
(btw - yes - beating up a 14 yo thieving scum is nice - it might make him think the next time - might not train his chav kids to thieve - probably save the entire nation 1p each - everyone should try it
)
13 December 2004, 09:24 AM
#17
Scooby Senior
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Next door to the WiFi connection
Posts: 16,293
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
so no 1 has mentioned anything about prosecuting you? personally IMO you deserve a medal but things dont usually work out that way do they
but things dont usually work out that way do they
13 December 2004, 09:58 AM
#21
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: The biosphere
Posts: 7,824
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Nice one FB! What was the damage?
Fractured Orbit - 20 pts
Boken Jaw - 20 pts
Broken nose - 10 pts
Lost Teeth - 10 pts each
Black eye - 5 pts each
Concussion - 5pts
Split lip/cuts - 3 pts per laceration
Fractured Orbit - 20 pts
Boken Jaw - 20 pts
Broken nose - 10 pts
Lost Teeth - 10 pts each
Black eye - 5 pts each
Concussion - 5pts
Split lip/cuts - 3 pts per laceration
13 December 2004, 11:04 AM
#23
BANNED
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: LIVERPOOL THE CENTRE OF EXCELLENCE
Posts: 8,511
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
Good on you.
Now for the lesson.......
Never give your name and address to anyone after smacking someone, even if he was a knife wielding maniac.
Never return to the venue, to " view " a cctv video.
Always dissappear after the event, dont hang around for the back slapping and congrats.
What you should now expect, IMHO.
You will get sued for assault, GBH, ABH or similar.
You will forget about the event until a letter drops on your mat in about six months time from a 'No Win No Fee' solicitors office.
The shoplifter will have legal aid because he isnt working, and will have full representation, you will get shafted.
Been there done that.
Sorry to put a downer on your heroic efforts, but this is the reality, sad but true.
I hope it doesnt happen to you.
Now for the lesson.......
Never give your name and address to anyone after smacking someone, even if he was a knife wielding maniac.
Never return to the venue, to " view " a cctv video.
Always dissappear after the event, dont hang around for the back slapping and congrats.
What you should now expect, IMHO.
You will get sued for assault, GBH, ABH or similar.
You will forget about the event until a letter drops on your mat in about six months time from a 'No Win No Fee' solicitors office.
The shoplifter will have legal aid because he isnt working, and will have full representation, you will get shafted.
Been there done that.
Sorry to put a downer on your heroic efforts, but this is the reality, sad but true.
I hope it doesnt happen to you.
13 December 2004, 11:25 AM
#24
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Sunny BELFAST
Posts: 19,408
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
@FB
Holy **** batman, nice one m8. hate these wee ******* costing us money in the long run, but what surprises me even more is that PSNI actually had 20 officers actually working !! good job, fookin hero in my book.
cheers
sinky
Holy **** batman, nice one m8. hate these wee ******* costing us money in the long run, but what surprises me even more is that PSNI actually had 20 officers actually working !!
good job, fookin hero in my book.cheers
sinky
13 December 2004, 12:01 PM
#25
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Bangor, Northern Ireland
Posts: 2,033
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
well done FB. i too fear that yoza speaks the truth :-(
it's bad enough venturing into chaz ridden shops (i.e. castlecourt) but this sort of thing just pisses me off.
must admit if i was in the same situation i probably wouldn't have been so brave!
it's bad enough venturing into chaz ridden shops (i.e. castlecourt) but this sort of thing just pisses me off.
must admit if i was in the same situation i probably wouldn't have been so brave!
13 December 2004, 01:30 PM
#26
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 566
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
TOP!
made me laugh as i saw a cartoon the other day with Granny from Tweety and Silvester swinging her fist and saying "POW! Right in the kisser"!! seemed to make the connection some how!
Yoza, can he counter sue as he now is too stressed when he goes shopping with the Mrs and kids??
made me laugh as i saw a cartoon the other day with Granny from Tweety and Silvester swinging her fist and saying "POW! Right in the kisser"!! seemed to make the connection some how!
Yoza, can he counter sue as he now is too stressed when he goes shopping with the Mrs and kids??
13 December 2004, 04:08 PM
#27
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,050
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
unfortunately i echo yozas words
ive been known to have the odd dust up myself (used to be a doorman)
and at one stage i had 4 yes 4 seperate gbh charges pending. I stress Im not a violent man, but doorwork neccesitates force. You will in all probability get sued if you left any kind of marks on this ******. This will be the scenario. He will deny all wrong doing, he will say he was minding his own business and that you set upon him causing these appaling injuries. Does the security tape show you striking him?
If it does i fear you are looking at
a, guilty plea for ABH after plea bargaining down from GBH-fine and conditional discharge
b, risking a not guilty plea and seeing what evidence his brief can pull out of his hat
Its a shame. but with the ambulance chasing tossers we have turned into a blame culture, ****** loving nation
b,
ive been known to have the odd dust up myself (used to be a doorman)
and at one stage i had 4 yes 4 seperate gbh charges pending. I stress Im not a violent man, but doorwork neccesitates force. You will in all probability get sued if you left any kind of marks on this ******. This will be the scenario. He will deny all wrong doing, he will say he was minding his own business and that you set upon him causing these appaling injuries. Does the security tape show you striking him?
If it does i fear you are looking at
a, guilty plea for ABH after plea bargaining down from GBH-fine and conditional discharge
b, risking a not guilty plea and seeing what evidence his brief can pull out of his hat
Its a shame. but with the ambulance chasing tossers we have turned into a blame culture, ****** loving nation
b,
13 December 2004, 04:21 PM
#28
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: The biosphere
Posts: 7,824
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
If he tries to sue then why not counter-sue the little f*ck for mental trauma to you, your family and the security guard for threatening you with a knife?
As for the criminal charges, I think it would be very disappointing if the police decided retrospectively that a crime had been committed after deciding to take no action at the time. Sadly in this day and age though, who knows!
As for the criminal charges, I think it would be very disappointing if the police decided retrospectively that a crime had been committed after deciding to take no action at the time. Sadly in this day and age though, who knows!
13 December 2004, 04:31 PM
#29
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,050
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
it wouldnt be a police prosecution neccesarily. The little **** will just ring one of the many no win no fee muppets who will just press charges. I would just distance yourself from the whole thing. Refuse to go back to the shop and shop elsewhere. The little tossers will get bailed quick smart and no doubt hang around the same shop. Do yourself a favour and lay low
13 December 2004, 04:35 PM
#30
Scooby Regular
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: The biosphere
Posts: 7,824
Likes: 0
Received 0 Likes
on
0 Posts
ABH, GBH etc are all criminal charges as far as I'm aware and can only be instigated by the police...
I'm no expert, but if the ****** brought a civil action it would be for "damages" like loss of earnings etc. and wouldn't carry the same names or penalties as criminal offences.
I'm no expert, but if the ****** brought a civil action it would be for "damages" like loss of earnings etc. and wouldn't carry the same names or penalties as criminal offences.