I dont want to eat the bloody thing... Lost the receipt. thought maybe trying to jump start the thing with a car battery and taking it to Epping forest.

 

PMSL

Wrong forum me thinks

 

You will need Turkey Resurrection V1.01b [1]








[1] This software is for thawed frozen turkeys and should not be under any circumstances used on Live or Fresh Killed Turkeys

[Edited by Cha0s. - 12/24/2003 4:22:18 PM]

 

Be serious....

I'm sure I can do it. trouble is it could die from the cold as it might take ages for its feathers to grow back??? Also is Epping safe?? some queer ******* visit late at night I am told.

And what about Foxes.. will they attack it??? Thinking about maybe attaching one of those ultra sonic things that scares off dogs/cats etc.

 

If you build it a small enclosure and feed it daily it should be ok, if you do want to do that then bring it out may way, i will look after it for you. Ive always wanted a pet frozen turky

 

Luke, you're a liar.

We all know you've already f**ked it to death.

Oh well, it least it died happy.

 

PMSL

 

No dissapointed

 

So cruel you lot....so cruel

 

Hmmmm, before thawing I would recommend you locate a head for the poor thing.

You may also need to re-attach it's internals organs, which are conveniently located in a little plastic bag in it's belly.

Stitching will then be required to hold it all together, but that may be a problem if it's frozen. Perhaps just monitor the body temperature and start stiching before the blood starts flowing again. Timing is crucial here!

And finally, you will need to make some prosthetic feet, but I'm sure a couple of ice-lolly sticks and sticky back plastic will take care of that.

Good luck, and I wish the Turkey well in it's new found freedom.

D.

 

Please read the thread title.


It is already defrosted.

I'm going to see if any zoo's will take it in.

 

good point about the head

No Head no Gobble Gobble

 

All you need to do is to fix all of the cell membrane damage(which would be widespread and critical) accross the entire body of the turkey,affix a new head donated from a live turkey via extensive micro-surgery(and using technology not yet invented)graft new 'trotters' ,feathers,internal organs(including a full heart/lung/liver transplant from a live donor)and if you can 'bring it around' after that lot and keep it alive you may release it into the wild ,but i wouldn't count on it bieng an easy procedure...

 

Please ensure you put the head back at the correct end or you will have a very unhappy turkey having to spend the rest of its life looking up its own ...... PS. Nice to see an animal loving thread for a change. DL

 

If youve thrown the neck away have a word with John Bobbit. He may be able to help you out there!

Chip.

[Edited by Chip - 12/24/2003 6:09:11 PM]

 

ITS ALL INTACT.

 

Is this still in NSR??

Have all the mods gone home early for Christmas?

 

No they are all trying to revive their turkeys