boxst

Hello

So i am approaching the age where my body is starting to complain visibly about the lack of exercise.

Mrs. Boxst is going away for three weeks, and I would like her to come back to a slightly fitter less flabby me. Any suggestions?

My thoughts turn to exercise everyday of course, but I don't know what.

Thank you for your input.

Steve.

P.S. Please no mention of the masturbation diet!

philz

If you don't do any regular exercise this is what will happen.

Day 1 : Go to gym and work hard
Day 2,3,4,5,6 : ache like mad and swear to never go back again.

Whatever you do, take it pretty easy at first otherwise your body will soon tell you about it!

ozzy

1. Start running for starters (or use a mountain bike)
2. Start doing bodyweight circuits - press-ups (std, wide-arm, close-arm), sit-ups, pull-ups (if you can), squat thrusts, dips (use some of your kitchen/dining room chairs), dumbell curls (or under-hand pull-ups), burpees, shuttle runs (25m sprints), squats, lunges, dorsal raises, etc.....
3. Start dieting

3 weeks isn't a long time and unless you go on a radical diet and start doing push-ups all day you'll not notice a huge improvement. If you just join a gym a go full on, you'll end up with nothing but sore muscles for days afterwards. Or better still, you'll tear a muscle and end up in bandages for your wife's return.

Other option is to get some liposuction and some chest/bicep implants

Stefan

ChrisB

Or hire a body double for Mrs B's return

andrewdelvard

You could always buy her a doll. Got them on offer in my shop at the moment £30 for #Big John#. The latex isn't the best quality but it's got a massive ****.

Just an idea

Tiggs

3 weeks on strict atkins diet (do a search) and u will look visably slimmer......guaranteed.

super_si

do like me 600 stomach excercises every day.

In 3 weeks you'll have a 4 pack at least

boxst

Hello

Thank you for the suggestions.

I don't think I will be investing in "Big John", and I hope that he isn't required. The same with the surrogate Steve.

I have thought about the Gym, but it doesn't really appeal. I used to do Karate and Ninjitsu 3 or 4 times a week (God, 17 years ago!!), so I might just find some local clubs and try that again if they promise not to hurt me.

What about swimming?

Steve.

Little Miss WRX

Swimming is a great exercise - I dislike swimming mainly because I was mentally scarred by some nassty swimming instructors from school, I have a fear of deep water and the chlorine in indoor pools irritates my asthma. I am also very short sighted and hate not being able to see.

I would urge you to join a gym, it is well worth it!

Kick boxing is great to do too.

ROBO

If you want to trim down noticeably in three weeks, running, sort your diet out and upper body excercises, sit ups, press ups etc and a lot of commitment (the hard part)

Badger Stuffer

I'm just about to start training tomorrow to raise my firness as I have been a lazy ****** for too long now and it's all caught up on me.

Starting with some running at lunchtime and then some sit ups and press ups at night.

Also giving up smoking too......

any other advice guys. I need to get fit for the Police physical and this includes the bleep test which to be frank, scares the cr@p out of me.

Jason.

gregh

to get fit to do the bleep test, do practise bleep tests. It's basically short sprints, so you need to work around that, but it's also endurance as well!

The other thing I found when actually doing it, is don't be cocky and think you can outrun the early bleeps, go as slow as you can to just make the bleep - it'll be worth it in the later stages.

regards,

greg

Little Miss WRX

Aye, pace yourself!!!!

To be honest, the bleep test isn't that bad.

I remember doing the bleep test for the first time at school, I wasn't fit and was still battling to get my asthma under control.
Out of 200 odd girls, I came third and beat most of the top runners in the school.

Warm up and stretch sufficiently beforehand and ensure you save yourself for the final bleeps - they're a bugger.
I hauled myself to the end, my legs gave way in the end because I pushed them too hard with too little training and didn't bother stretching!!!!

It isn't as daunting as it is made out to be. I have to complete a bleep test for my referee fitness tests and complete the requirements comfortably - IMHO they should up the rate and make it harder!

Badger Stuffer

Greg....Cheers. I think the requirement is to get to level 8.

How far up the range is that?

I am seriously unfit at the moment. Will it take long to get fit enough to do this?

Jason.



Edited to add....."Cheers Chelle"....

[Edited by Badger Stuffer - 7/15/2003 10:17:01 AM]

Little Miss WRX

How long till your physical test?

I would recommend you get off your **** and start now!
Take it easy at first, don't push yourself, build up. It will be boring as hell, but if you don't then you may end up with numerous stress injuries such as ones I am reocvering from - shin splints for example which are a bugger to get rid of and after having them once, your chance of getting them again is increased.

Sort out some good comfortable runners, check out my thread where Ozzy has some great advice in there.

ALWAYS do stretching to warm up and down - a light jog aswell as stretching.

ChrisB

How fit do you have to be to join the Police. Not even break into a sweat by the looks of it...

SteveV-WRX

Badger Stuffer

they have actually just standardised (sp) the 'bleep test' level needed for all applicants, men and women no need to be able to achieve level 5 - 8, or so says my application i have recieved a couple of days ago (surrey police).

Steve

Little Miss WRX

Does look pretty easy to me - if they lower it for women, then men should have no problem at all!

Badger Stuffer

Col....Cheers Chris.

Still sh1ting myself though as I am well below adverage fitness.

I should be looking at taking the physical in about 3 months so I figure that if I start now then I should be OK.

I hope.

Jason.

Anyone here recently done it?

ozzy

Jason,

You need to start running to build your core cardiovascular system (i.e. heart & lungs). The bleep test is used to determine just what the maximum amount of oxygen your body can intake and use. It's used to come up with a so-called VO2 max score.

Basically, it's just some shuttle runs which get progressively faster. You need to keep in time with the beeps. If you are falling behind, I think you get one or two shuttles to catch up. If you can't then that's your limit.

I think the average for a reasonably fit person is around level 9-10.

Don't worry too much about it. They'll be other blokes running the test with you and should help push you on. I have a CD of the bleep test if you want a copy. All you need is a CD player, some cones about 15m apart and a mate to count the shuttles.

The best method of increasing your VO2 max is to perform some interval sessions. Start building your core CV by starting to do regular runs/jogs. If you haven't ran in years, I'd suggest doing 3 runs of between 15-20mins. Increase your runs by 5-10mins every 2 weeks (more if you feel fit enough).

Usually you need to have a good long period of steady running before starting intervals, but if you're short on time start after the 2nd week.

Find a local football pitch and try sprinting around it as fast as you can. (if you can't manage it, try 1/2 the picth). Rest for 2-3mins, then do this again. Try to run 3 laps/half-laps in total.

The distance isn't important in the early stages. Every 2 weeks, try adding an additional lap or decreasing your rest (recovery time in between laps).

As long as your pushing yourself, you'll get a huge benefit from this type of training and it'll help you with the shuttle runs.

I've was told not to do too many interval sessions. Once a week is fine.
Have a look here for some examples.

Good luck,

Stefan

ozzy

Level 5-8

Jeez that's pretty low. You could get to level 5 with your eyes shut

With 3 months, you could easily get into double-figures on a bleep test. I went from absolutely no running, to doing the test in 6 weeks and reached level 11.

I'm doing the bleep test for my Royal Marine fitness assessment at the end of next month, so I'll see if I've improved any.

Stefan

Badger Stuffer

Cheers guys. YThanks for the advice. I'll start tonight and keep on pushing until I am confident.

I have 3 months so it should be plenty of time.



Thanks again.

SteveV-WRX

on the similar point, i'm looking for a training partner at the moment, based in west london, im not particularly fit, but as with BS looking to get into the police so have some specific goals in mind.

added advantage is that i'm a leisure mangaer, so easy access to facilities.

if similar, give me a PM as per profile.

Steve

ScoobyJawa

I've not spoken to one Osteopath or Physio that recomends running or jogging, its so unbelievable harsh on your knees its one of the worst things you can do and a big cause of knee probs when you are older. They always recommend a good workout on a bike which is far less intensive on the body but just as good.

Badger Stuffer

Cheers Steve but a bit far for me to travel.

Thanks for the poffer though.

Jason.

Little Miss WRX

Steve, fancy getting across to Aus? I need a training partner also.

ScoobyJawa, you have a point - when jogging, jog on soft surfaces such as grass, not pavement or road. I have a grass oval track literally 100 metres from where I live.

ScoobyJawa

Handy

Tiggs

on the police thing....i applied to Thames Valley about 9-10 years ago, as i had asthma they said do the physical first as if you fail you know to not bother with any other tests.

did the test and MY GOD the standard was gross....there where 3ft6 ladies there that could do a press up without getting on their knees and the bleep test..aggggghhhh.

after level 6-7ish there was only me and one other bloke left.....the others buggered of and left us to it (he beat me...scarwny triathalete geek!)

anyway, they all passed...pathetic.

Tiggs

luckly for me i then fail my dictaion test and never got in! thank god!

Little Miss WRX

Oddly enough, I tend to get more issues with my knees than when I run!!!!

ScoobyJawa

Weird - I have terrible knees and I can cycle as far as you want with no issues - running just knackers them.

Ah well - just going on what I was told ..........