Ray_li

Iv been applying for Design Engineering jobs for along time now with no success. Please tell me what you think of my covering letter that i send to companies. Or if it is possible post me your covering letter plaese (best if it along the lines of engineering)
Thanks

Ray

************************************************** ****************

Dear Sir or Madam:

Design Engineer

I read with interest to your advertisement for the above position, as in particular the description outlined relates to my qualifications and experience within a challenging environment.

I have successfully completed my degree at Coventry University and not only have I improved my skills but I have also gained valuable experiences in design. My studied course options include: Design Methods; Engineering Science; Manufacturing Technology; Materials; CAD/CAM and Electronics / Control / Microprocessors, which provides me with a comprehensive knowledge suitable for all areas within an organisation such as yours. I am highly proficient in design, having designed a Portable Massaging chair that folds into a Massaging Table.

I learn quickly and work well under pressure. I am a confident person with an outgoing personality; therefore I work well within a group. I am also a self-motivated person who is able to work efficiently and effectively as an individual. I co-led a group of designers to design a Mobile Base Transceiver Station for Nokia Networks. As a group member I had to make some important decisions, which involved the selection of materials and incorporate technical functionality of the final design. The most important decision I had to make was to finalise the design of the Mobile Base Transceiver Station.

With my experience over the past three years, both in academic and in personality, I feel that I am suited to your requirements as I always have a keen interest in the areas that you require. For example, my Portable Massaging chair that folds into a Massaging table.

The prospect at Company name here presents a comprehensive mix of all areas to further develop my potentials and I also believe that my character and skills as well as knowledge will be well suited to Company name here needs. In addition, your company offers the challenges that I have always been looking forward to and at the same time providing me with first hand experience of a pro-active design company.

I enclosed a copy of my CV and I would be glad to discuss my application further with you at your convenience. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours faithfully


[Edited by Ray_li - 4/13/2003 3:39:40 PM]

carl

Only mention the portable massaging chair that folds into a massaging table the once!

Other than that, it looks fine. See if you can tailor the letter and CV to each job for which you apply, rather than just mailmerging the company name and position into a form letter. I applied for well in excess of 200 jobs after I left university

James Neill

iTrader: (1)

Crikey - a bit long, here's mine. BTW - have never failed to get an interview for a job application. May be it's luck - may be not ??

---------------------------

Dear <whoever>

I would like to place my name before you, for the position of <whatever>, in answer to your recent advertisement (<whereever&gt.

Currently employed as a consultant with the <organisation> which is a <whatever> company. I feel my experience and qualifications would be well suited to the position.

A brief resume of my qualifications and career to date is enclosed for your consideration. Naturally I world be pleased to provide any further details should my application be of interest.

---------------------------

There you go. My view is that no one reads covering letters - they just go for the resume.

Regards
James


[Edited by James Neill - 4/13/2003 5:05:26 PM]

MarkO

"I learn quickly and work well under pressure. I am a confident person with an outgoing personality; therefore I work well within a group. I am also a self-motivated person who is able to work efficiently and effectively as an individual."

Whenever I've been interviewing or helping with recruitment, I've always found these sorts of things slightly cheesy and pointless. After all, you would say that, wouldn't you? (this isn't a criticism, just an observation).

I agree about shortening the letter, though. It needs to be more punchy - the detail about specific projects, etc., should be in the CV.

One other thing - whenever possible, modify & tailor the letter (and the CV) to match the specific job you're going for. It takes a bit more effort than just changing the company name/job title, but it'll look better to the person reading it. Mail-merged cover-letters are easy to spot....

DJFish

Lose the second massage chair reference, makes it sound like you hang around Turkish baths,
Shorten to make it a bit punchier,

Try to mention something specific about the company ie: "I notice that your company was an industry leader in 2002 when you won such and such award and I feel I'd be able to contribute to your continuing success"
Makes it sound like you've done your homework.

Good luck

Dave

Ray_li

James-Wow. looking at yours and mine it does seem a bit long. will do my best to shorten it.

Marko- im opened to criticism. I trying to learn as much as possible

Keep them cuming i need more.

Ray

[Edited by Ray_li - 4/13/2003 7:49:00 PM]

Mice_Elf

Ray...That is an incredibly long covering letter!!

Mine always consisted of the following :

Dear Sir / Madam,

With reference to your advertisement (o)in newspaper or internet site, please find enclosed my CV.

Many thanks
Me.

No one reads those things anyway. Never failed to get me an interview, though!

MattN

got to agree it's too long.

Now I'm interviewing I get loads of really long CV's last thing I want is a long letter.

Keep it short, very short, intorduce yourself and why you are writing, let your CV do the talking. In fact sometimes HR don't even pass on the letter!

Brendan Hughes

What They Said - too long. It's a monologue FFS! And reads like a model covering letter off a university website - all the buzzwords.

Fairly short sentences, mention your degree (perhaps don't even say which uni) and a couple of projects, all inside two paras.
Covering letter should simply encourage them to read your CV by pointing out either the two or three key points in it.

Completely agree with personalising it to fit the company too. It's usually quite obvious from applicants who really is interested in the company and who has just done a mail merge.

Good luck

Brendan

[Edited by Brendan Hughes - 4/13/2003 9:34:26 PM]

hades

I always use something nearly as small as mice_elf's, but with something like "I feel the following points make me particularly suited to <position name>:", with three or four short bullet points, based on your CV, the job advert and anything else you know about the company; something to quickly make them think you are worth looking at.

AndyC_772

iTrader: (2)

I agree that it's long, but it also feels very contrived and unnatural, like you're trying to include as many buzzwords as possible. Your CV is the place to list your skills and experience, so all that the covering letter really needs to do is explain which position you're applying for and where you saw the ad.

You could also include a couple of lines explaining why you want to work for that particular company, but leave out the jargon - just say in plain English why you picked that particular job out of others that were advertised (assuming that there is actually something you like about that company, and that you're not applying out of desperation or because they're paying the most!).

Good luck

Andy.

SWRTWannabe

Shouldn't that be "I read with interest your advertisement" i.e. no "to"?

Mice_Elf

Or even "I read your advert with interest"...

Scumbag

IMHO the covering letter should always be tailored to the specific vacancy for which you are applying...maybe mention something about the company, or the skills mentioned in the advert, and link h=them to yourself. Keep it fairly short, mind.

You may want to tailor the CV to the post as well

Good luck

SB

Little Miss WRX

As people have said above, a covering letter should basically experess interest for the position......the CV does the rest of the work.....which you should ideally tailor for each job application.

bros2

[Edited by bros2 - 7/3/2003 10:11:27 AM]

Ray_li

Thanks everyone. Im going to spend the day re-doing my covering letter. i'll keep you updated with my progress.
Would post my CV but it will come out all funny cuz its in MS word.

Ray