New TAX !!!!! Grrrrrrrrrr
06 March 2007, 04:42 PM
#1
New TAX !!!!! Grrrrrrrrrr
Heard about this today 
STOP PRESS: FROM INLAND REVENUE
New Peni-Tax from April 2007
The only thing that the Government has not taxed yet is the male *****.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in a hole.
On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective from the 6th of April 2007, the ***** will now be taxed according to size.
The brackets are as follows:
10 - 12" Luxury Tax £300.00
8 - 10" Pole Tax £250.00
5 - 8" Privilege Tax £150.00
3 - 5" Nuisance Tax £30.00
Males exceeding 12" must file capital gains.
Anyone under 3 inches is eligible for a tax refund.
PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION
STOP PRESS: FROM INLAND REVENUE
New Peni-Tax from April 2007
The only thing that the Government has not taxed yet is the male *****.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in a hole.
On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective from the 6th of April 2007, the ***** will now be taxed according to size.
The brackets are as follows:
10 - 12" Luxury Tax £300.00
8 - 10" Pole Tax £250.00
5 - 8" Privilege Tax £150.00
3 - 5" Nuisance Tax £30.00
Males exceeding 12" must file capital gains.
Anyone under 3 inches is eligible for a tax refund.
PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION
06 March 2007, 04:51 PM
#2
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Heard about this today
STOP PRESS: FROM INLAND REVENUE
New Peni-Tax from April 2007
The only thing that the Government has not taxed yet is the male *****.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in a hole.
On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective from the 6th of April 2007, the ***** will now be taxed according to size.
The brackets are as follows:
10 - 12" Luxury Tax £300.00
8 - 10" Pole Tax £250.00
5 - 8" Privilege Tax £150.00
3 - 5" Nuisance Tax £30.00
Males exceeding 12" must file capital gains.
Anyone under 3 inches is eligible for a tax refund.
PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION
STOP PRESS: FROM INLAND REVENUE
New Peni-Tax from April 2007
The only thing that the Government has not taxed yet is the male *****.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in a hole.
On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective from the 6th of April 2007, the ***** will now be taxed according to size.
The brackets are as follows:
10 - 12" Luxury Tax £300.00
8 - 10" Pole Tax £250.00
5 - 8" Privilege Tax £150.00
3 - 5" Nuisance Tax £30.00
Males exceeding 12" must file capital gains.
Anyone under 3 inches is eligible for a tax refund.
PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION
Do I do a self assessment?
Or should I get an IFA in to go over my affairs?
And if I fold it in half the tax man won't know if I am coming or going.
Mark
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