Depends on how well they are getting on.

My landlord is separated from his partner and has been for some time.

They both worked out an amicable arrangement for access to the kids which works well for both of them.
The kids know what is going on and are happy as both parents still get on well as friends.

So your mate and his partner need to talk to each other to sort it out.

[Edited by Little Miss WRX - 9/2/2002 10:47:59 AM]

 

Is/was it the right decision?

 

Depends whose kids they are.

 

Morning Mark! Yeah, spose so!

Just a mate who wants to leave their other half, but doesn't want to miss out on their kids growing up. I have no idea what to advise, wondered if anyone on here had ever been in that predicament...

 

Ta 'Chelle. I guess he'll say he's tried that; i don't know whether they're getting on well still, but he's not a happy bunny for sure...

 

My parents tryed this for a while....

I think it would work well if it was a "house sharing" type agreement, i.e. it was made quite clear they weren't trying to maintain a relationship which would just confuse the kids...they would also have to be *very* good friends, I used to dread coming home from school due to the atmosphere that was in the house, def. needs to be a positive one with everyone getting on reasonably well....

Otherwise - if it's constant shouting/fighting/argueing (even if it's quiet - the Simpsons episode where Homer and Marge go and sit in the car to argue and not let the kids know, Bart and Lisa at the window saying "Mum and Dad are arguing again!" springs to mind - kids always know what's going on....) then def. not. Just makes for an unhappy/stressful atmosphere for the kids If living appart is the answer, then make sure a good arrangement is worked out and stuck to. We used to have a room at each house which worked quite well and made some means to eliminating the "moving house every week" feeling....not easy, but I'd say the best solution if the above was the case...

All only IMO though!

Jen

 

Jen, appreciate that, some great ideas.

But wouldn't "house-sharing" prevent them getting on with their lives? I'm assuming they'd rather find new people to do things with, and no potential partner is going to buy into this sort of scheme are they..?

 

Tel Boy - I agree It would be limiting, and prehaps a bit like an American sitcom - but I have seen the arrangement work, albeit in a large house (i.e. enough bedrooms for everyone), I think it would take a certain type of very tolerant person...and of course understanding potential partners, guess it depends on how much people are prepared to sacrifice for the kids....

I guess in the ideal world living next door would be the solution...

Jen

 

TelBoy - they're doing a story along these lines on Coronation Street at the moment. Perhaps your 'friend' should check it out?

 

Mark, trust me mate, it ain't me. I'll mention it, thanks.